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Disability (Mention of suicide)

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Posted May 14th 2022 at 01:08 AM by Ennui.

I am more stable now than when I was in the hospital which is good, but I still feel sad and anxious a lot of the time. My prescriber mentioned the words "treatment resistant" to me and sometimes I worry that that's the case. I have been in therapy off and on since the 8th grade and have been on medication for around 6 or 7 years and am still miserable a lot of the time.

I have a post up about work and the possibility of applying for disability. Even if I do end up applying for and/or getting approved for disability, I sometimes find it hard to admit that I have a disability. I tell myself that no, it can't be that bad, but when you attempt suicide because of your job (because of working in general really), you know that it's that bad.

Driving is still an issue as well. I haven't driven since I failed and the thought gives me anxiety. I'm afraid of failure.

It's also weird that a little over a month ago I tried to kill myself and ended up in the hospital. Now life goes on and I'm expected to be okay and act like nothing ever happened.

I don't know, I've just been feeling off.
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    eaty's Avatar
    Accepting that you have a disability is hard, and I totally get it. I’ve finally come to terms with it, and gotten to a point where I don’t feel like I need to push myself to please everyone else who doesn’t understand. So I get it.

    I’m always around if you need anything, even if it’s just to share pet photos.
    permalink
    Posted May 14th 2022 at 02:05 AM by eaty eaty is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Arabesque- golfing girl.'s Avatar
    I'm sorry about all of this and I hope that you will be okay soon and everything works out for you soon. Sending you lots of to help you.
    permalink
    Posted May 14th 2022 at 12:19 PM by Arabesque- golfing girl. Arabesque- golfing girl. is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Admitting and accepting you have a disability can be really tough, especially when those around you aren't supportive or believe you truly have any type of debilitating condition. I think it's important to remember you know yourself the best, all you can do is keep advocating.

    I'm always here to listen and offer support if you ever choose to reach out. :hug:
    permalink
    Posted May 15th 2022 at 03:34 PM by
 
 
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