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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Unhappy i give up - September 6th 2012, 10:57 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

i really feel like i'm being selfish here, but i don't know what to do anymore.i am literally on the verge of killing myself.i have scissors and a Listerine bottle right in front of me, and i intend to use these.i give up on trying.i'm always trying but it's never enough.i started cutting a lot again, and i'm so frustrated that i can't get deep enough in the skin to end this all.i don't know what to think anymore.i just don't want to live.there's no point for me here.i'm not important in any way in anyone's life.i don't believe in people anymore.everything is empty promises and empty feelings.there's no one to trust.there's no one to go to; and when you try to go to someone, you'll only get pushed away.no one wants to hear your crap, let alone help you, and i really am sorry that people have to read this crap as well.i've told my parents that i've cut again and they said they'd get a therapist for me, but they're just too busy to look for one, and i don't know where to find one.my "best friend" abandoned me even though he promised he'll be there for me, especially since he's the only other person who knows; but he gets annoyed at me instead and tells me to "get a life!" i'm not trying to push him away, but no one else is trying to help...and i can't talk to any other friends about this.if my "best friend" doesn't even want to help me, how much more other friends, right?so, there's no use in trying.i guess i'm just here to get one last advice or encouragement to go through with this.i really hate myself, even more now because i just had to post this up for help.i'm not scared of dying; i'm scared of knowing that people are lies.there is no such thing as friendship, no such thing as love, and no such thing as caring.people, like myself, just use others for their selfishness, to make themselves feel better that they aren't "like her/him", to use them to get something, to make themselves feel superior; people step on one another to get to the top.there's no one to trust and no one will ever be there for anyone else just because they care.people are lies, and i am a lie.this is why i want to die, to kill myself, and to end this all.
   
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Re: i give up - September 7th 2012, 01:25 PM

Never give up, never stop after trying to talk to one person. One person will not change anything. It's sort of like an intervention, if you will, one person can't do jackshit, but a group who pull together can if you understand. Listen, I'm sure there are many on this site willing to talk with you and help you out of the rut you find yourself in. I myself am one of them. Just send me a message if you wish to talk. And I am deadly serious, I'm not exactly a selfish person, I'd rather help others than listen to myself complain. And I'm here to help.

Sincerely,
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My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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Re: i give up - September 11th 2012, 09:49 PM

thank you for trying, Jay....but i can't do it anymore...the last person i tried to talk to, my "best friend"....he abandoned me.....he said that he can't be there, that he can't be my strength like he promised.....i can't trust anyone anymore....i have too many broken promises, and i give up....they all abandon me...even my mother doesn't want to help me...she wants to push the matter aside, and is going so far as bluffing to me....i don't have anyone who i go to....i don't have any friends.....i'm sorry....i really need to just disappear now.....
   
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Re: i give up - September 11th 2012, 10:49 PM

Inside you, something's still clinging on. You wouldn't be here otherwise.

That Listerine bottle won't kill you, for the record. There's a chance it'll happen but I'd estimate that you're 99.9% more likely to suffer from permanent brain damage instead. It's the same case with pills - unless you took a lot (I won't give the exact dosage for obvious reasons), you wouldn't die. The human body is much tougher than you give it credit for. You'd just end up paralysed or worse for the rest of your life - is that what you really want?

No, it isn't. You know that, I know that.

Regarding cutting deep enough to kill yourself, it isn't going to happen unless you use some very specific tools. If you're using a razor blade, the worst you can hope for is probably a severed nerve, which would leave you with a duff arm and not much more. Don't even try, it's not worth it.

Once you've hit the bottom, the only way to move is up. I've been in a similar situation and trust me, I look back on it almost every day and think what a dick move that would've been. You'll get through this. We'll get through this. You're not on your own.

Before you do anything rash, think about it. Ask yourself; Is this what I want? I can almost guarantee the answer will be no, as everybody has something to cling to.

Stay strong. Mail me if you have any queries.
   
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Re: i give up - September 14th 2012, 11:16 PM

Dude, you are so wrong when you say that no one cares. if no one cared, then the two people who are encoraging you on this form (now three including myself) wouldnt be here. we do care. just remember; you are NOT alone. people DO care about you. WE care about you
   
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Re: i give up - September 14th 2012, 11:22 PM

Yes! We are here and we are here to offer support. Even if a screen is between us, the internet has us together! Keep holding on! Don't give up without fighting with everything you have!

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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