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Numb. - September 13th 2012, 04:25 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Have you ever just felt.. numb? Like completely void of all emotion? Before, that was all I wanted. To feel nothing. To not hurt or be sad anymore. But it's really not as great as I thought.. I don't feel happiness, fear, not even sadness or anger. How does one function without emotion? I know it's bad, and an addicting habit, but I've recently started.. scratching myself. Not with my nails or anything, but with a pair of scissors. I never draw blood, but I keep running the point across my skin until the skin breaks. Physical pain seems to be the only thing I am capable of feeling now, and that's a scary thought. I don't want to hurt myself.. but I also don't want to be an emotionless robot.. I just do know how else to.. make myself feel something..
   
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Re: Numb. - September 13th 2012, 01:38 PM

Do you care about anything or are you apathetic towards life in general? Cuz thats not a good sign, I don't mean to freak you out but that could be serious, i experienced the same thing. Not feeling anything and needing to feel something. I know it's probably not what you want to hear but what helped me was going to see a counselor....it took a couple before I found the right one but in the end it helped a lot and I finally got some answers so you should seriously consider that Good luck girly, feel free to PM me anytime with any questions or concerns.
   
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Re: Numb. - September 14th 2012, 02:50 AM

I mean yeah, there are certain things I care about, but more often than not, I just feel completely apathetic. I know I should talk to someone, and I will take that into consideration. Thank you c:
   
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Re: Numb. - September 14th 2012, 06:10 AM

No prob Talking to a counselor isn't as scary as it sounds, really
   
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Re: Numb. - September 14th 2012, 06:23 AM

It's not so much the fact that it sounds scary.. even though it does. It's more so just telling my mom. And the fact that I was forced to talk to my school counselor once, I know it's not the same, but it didn't exactly do much.. I just don't want to risk wasting everyone's time and money.. Kinda stupid, I know..
   
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Re: Numb. - September 14th 2012, 06:39 AM

yea, telling parents is hard......being under 18 sucks cuz you cant just go do something like that on your own......ive been dealing with depression for over a year now and just now told my mom, cuz i had to but thats besides the point........maybe not making it such a big deal, maybe saying "hey mom, I think it might be a good idea if I could see a counselor, nothing serious just need a little help" idk I never had to do that....ummm I'll let you know if I have more suggestions.
   
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Re: Numb. - September 14th 2012, 11:36 PM

Yeah.. but I mean, the good thing is I'll be 18 in November, so maybe in a couple months I'll.. revisit the topic. I dunno.
   
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