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Tired of living - December 27th 2012, 05:00 PM

Right now, nothing's going right at all. I'm just so miserable. Why should I be alive if all I will be doing is living a miserable life, where all I will be doing is being a burden to everyone around me. I'm just so done right now. I could take all of the pills in house to kill myself. There's enough to do just that.

I'm sorry, but I can't keep living like this.




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Re: Tired of living - December 27th 2012, 05:28 PM

If you're miserable about your life, then change it. You have to be the change you wish to see. Sure, it's hard and it's not going to all happen at once but as soon you start making changes, even just small one's, you'll be making your way into recovery. In fact, I think you've already started. Sure, you're not happy as such, but I know you have your good moments and your good days. And sure, there are bad moments and bad days, just like today, but you have to make a plan for what to do on days like today. Things to keep yourself distracted with, things to do that you can enjoy, you know?

You have to take control. These thoughts, these urges, these negative emotions, they don't have to be in control unless you allow them to be. I know all of them are hard and horrible things and feelings to experience, but they are harmless. They can not hurt you, only you can hurt you. And only you can stop yourself from hurting you. You can beat them, people do and if you work hard, take responsibility and stay determined, you'll get there. You are more than capable of getting through this and you are worth the fight.

I think you're desperate for a way out of feeling this way and I think to you killing yourself seems the "best" way out because it means there's no hard work. It's not going to take months of feeling horrible emotions and overcome horrible thoughts and urges. But there's a reason for that, because the easy way, leads to nothing. Yes, no sadness, but no happiness either. The hard way out, is going to involve working hard, actually taking responsibility for yourself and your actions, beating hard and horrible urges and thoughts and it's going to take time. However, in the end, well, the goal is happiness, right? Sure, not every day will be bright and shiny. No one has a perfect life, but it will be happiness and it will not be having these urges.

And that my friend, is beautiful. That my friend, is a fight worth fighting for.


"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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Re: Tired of living - December 28th 2012, 09:30 PM

Thanks for posting this. I appreciate it. I'm doing somewhat better then what I was feeling yesterday.




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