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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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PrettyBoiSwag Offline
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Name: Brandon
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Unhappy Im litterally about to go crazy! - January 29th 2013, 03:25 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So im a ftm transgender im still in highschool i first came out to my dad he just said he will accept me for who i am and before my freshmen year in highschool i tried to come out to my mother but i didnt go so well because you see im a christian and my mom believes im going to hell and all me and her ever do is get into arguments till this day. Once my freshmen year started i say in like december i noticed i started to get really depressed because i dont have the right parts and in highschool you have sports and girls. I first started considering suicide in like february of last year i had a major crush on this one girl but she rejected me because of lacking parts. Know as a sophmore its all,gotten worse for me i love basketball and really want to play but not for the girps because im not one and it would be uncomfortable for me and them because im alittle on the popular side and so everyone knows i like girls. I also love football i mean i planned on trying out but i dont know im just tired of missing out on every damn thing im missing my whole boyhood because of it id like to go to my homecoming and winterfest dances even be on court because it would be a cool opportunity for me. I mean know im starting to feel lonely because most of my friends have girlfriends or boyfriends ive never had a girlfriend or a real kiss from a girl which sucks because i do happen to want a girlfriend i pass and have been told im badd but i just feel like no girl would ever date me because either they want a dick or their a lesbian i mean lacking the parts is already stressful enough but when im rejected because of it i start to feel worse its to the point were i dont like hearing people talk about realationships and marriage or even pregnancy because i cant produce sperm. The surgery for transguys isnt even all that good im just really starting to get suicidle again im always misunderstood i just feel imma be lonely for the rest of my life nothin is going my way im just ready to call it quits on life again

Last edited by PrettyBoiSwag; January 29th 2013 at 06:52 PM.
   
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arepo Offline
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Re: Im litterally about to go crazy! - February 12th 2013, 12:08 AM

Hey there, welcome to TeenHelp. I'm sorry you haven't received a reply sooner!

It's very good that your dad accepts you for who you are, turn to him if you ever need someone to talk to if you can. As for your mum, I don't think she doesn't love you or really hates you. I think she's just confused about it because you have to remember, you're a completely different generation than she is and when she was your age it generally wasn't accepted like it is now. I think she will come around to it, just give her some time to accept it.

With school, you should look into talking to your school guidance counsellor. They can definitely help you pursue things like sports and things like that, that have a gender binary. Meet with them as soon as possible and let them know how you're feeling, they can really help accommodate you in school.

With dating, well, I'm honestly no good at it myself. :no sweat: I do know that friends are also an important part of anyone's life. I think you should try to focus more on your friendships than dating relationships right now. I'm assuming people are pretty accepting of you at school, just that you're having trouble with the sports and stuff. (Like I said, guidance counsellors are like magic wizards.) For ftm's it is a little bit more difficult with not having the sexual parts you think you should have. I can't entirely relate, but I can a little bit. But there is always someone out there that will love you for who you are regardless of what's in your pants.

You're never truly alone unless you make it that way, which can happen when you're suicidal or depressed. You might be isolating more and not hanging out with your friends. You need to be social because not being social is just going to make you feel much more alone and hopeless when you're not. If you're ever feeling like you're really going to hurt yourself, call your parents or 911 and get to an emergency room. You need to stay safe. I don't know you very well, but I don't want to not see you around anymore.

You also might want to consider therapy, which can help a lot. They have much better advice and techniques for you to use than I could ever come up with.

Stay strong and remember you can message me at any time and I will listen to anything you have to say.

- Immy.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
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PrettyBoiSwag Offline
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Re: Im litterally about to go crazy! - February 17th 2013, 10:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Neutrois View Post
Hey there, welcome to TeenHelp. I'm sorry you haven't received a reply sooner!

It's very good that your dad accepts you for who you are, turn to him if you ever need someone to talk to if you can. As for your mum, I don't think she doesn't love you or really hates you. I think she's just confused about it because you have to remember, you're a completely different generation than she is and when she was your age it generally wasn't accepted like it is now. I think she will come around to it, just give her some time to accept it.

With school, you should look into talking to your school guidance counsellor. They can definitely help you pursue things like sports and things like that, that have a gender binary. Meet with them as soon as possible and let them know how you're feeling, they can really help accommodate you in school.

With dating, well, I'm honestly no good at it myself. :no sweat: I do know that friends are also an important part of anyone's life. I think you should try to focus more on your friendships than dating relationships right now. I'm assuming people are pretty accepting of you at school, just that you're having trouble with the sports and stuff. (Like I said, guidance counsellors are like magic wizards.) For ftm's it is a little bit more difficult with not having the sexual parts you think you should have. I can't entirely relate, but I can a little bit. But there is always someone out there that will love you for who you are regardless of what's in your pants.

You're never truly alone unless you make it that way, which can happen when you're suicidal or depressed. You might be isolating more and not hanging out with your friends. You need to be social because not being social is just going to make you feel much more alone and hopeless when you're not. If you're ever feeling like you're really going to hurt yourself, call your parents or 911 and get to an emergency room. You need to stay safe. I don't know you very well, but I don't want to not see you around anymore.

You also might want to consider therapy, which can help a lot. They have much better advice and techniques for you to use than I could ever come up with.

Stay strong and remember you can message me at any time and I will listen to anything you have to say.

- Immy.
Well when i am social i just get negative stuff and i hear what your saying but that stuff is still gonna bother me
   
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