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im in a endless hell hole - October 13th 2015, 01:26 PM

im in mental institute for over 6 months now im only allowed to come home the weekends i cant take this anymore i just wanna go to sleep and never wake up again my life i fucked up but at the end there is no turning back cry every day to sleep if im not allowed to come home im here until im 18 just thinking of that just wanna make you die i never talked about it to my friends on xbox


it takes a strong man to deny whats right in front of him and if the truth is undeniable you create your own
   
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Re: im in a endless hell hole - October 13th 2015, 10:46 PM

Hey there.

Sounds like you're struggling a lot right now and I'm sorry for that. May I ask why you are going to be in the mental institute until you are 18? If my knowledge is correct, you should only be there for the purpose of recovery for the issues you are dealing with; not until you are a legal adult. Forgive me if I'm wrong!

As hard as it might be, I suggest reaching out to the staff there and letting them know how you feel. There should be counselors available for you to talk to and express how you're feeling. That could help a lot because they could offer you comfort and maybe find ways to help you feel more comfortable there. Along with simply being able to get these feelings off your chest.

While you are there, do you have anything to do in terms of hobbies and distractions to make your stay a bit more happier? Creative hobbies such as crafts, painting/drawing and creative writing could be a rather fun distraction that also lets you express yourself at the same time. Simply journaling could be a good outlet too. You should be allowed visitors so is there a way your family and/or friends could arrange to visit you during the week? As for people there, are you able to socialize with others your age to make friends? That could be a rather positive experience to be able to talk with others who may be able to relate to things that you are going through also.

I don't know the full story and details so I'm not fully aware of what you're going through but regardless, I want to encourage you to keep holding on. Continuing on may seem impossible but it is possible. Recovery is possible and you are strong enough to make it through this. Don't give up on yourself, okay? You can do this and you don't have to do it alone. Don't be afraid to ask for help and lean on others. Take care.
   
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Re: im in a endless hell hole - October 14th 2015, 07:55 AM

the weekends dont go to great 1 time the cops came and brought me back to the mental institute and if i behave i can go home early


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Re: im in a endless hell hole - October 14th 2015, 02:26 PM

Hi there.

I relate to how you feel in someways because I've spent years on psychiatric wards too. I have the same question as Nala though. Why do you have to stay until you're eighteen? Normally, you get discharged when you are doing generally better and when this has been going on for a period of time. IE you woudn't just get discharged after a few weeks of feeling better but you could possibly after a few months of feeling better. This could happen within in a few months for you, in a few years, or even after you're eighteen. It sounds like they are focusing to get you out for the wrong reasons. I want to make sure you are well to come out, your age doesn't matter; So why discharge when you're eighteen? I hope that makes sense?

Can I ask what kind of ward you are on? Ie acute ward, dbt ward etc? Do you have an activity co-ordinator on the word or even an occupational therapist that you could talk to about getting joined in in some activities and games? If you are on a therapy ward then are you engaging in the therapy and if you aren't doing so then maybe that's something you could start doing? Bring your own hobbies in too! For example, when I was in hospital, I used to do a lot of knittiw and sewing (but it did have to be supervised), writing letters, listening to music, exercise, reading, playing board games with others etc. Can you try doing things like these? Visits are also great for while you're in hospital. Nothing can cheer you up more I find. Do you get many visits or do they not go well?

I don't know a lot about your situation, what led you to this point or why you are in hospital, but if you want to talk about it then know that we're here to listen to you, okay? You aren't alone in this and we're more than happy to help you through this as much and as best as we can do. But the more you talk to (if you feel comfortable with doing so) then the more we can help you and that's all we want; to help you. And talk to the staff on the ward too. Its what they are there for. I know talking can be a scary thing but its one of the main keys to getting better or at least I think it is and its so important you don't isolate yourself.

I hope this helps in some way and I hope things start to look up for you. Take good care of yourself and remember we're always here!
Jessie


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Re: im in a endless hell hole - October 15th 2015, 09:08 AM

Hello there

I think you need to change your outlook in life because it appears that you're looking at things very negatively, and everyone goes through challenges. But what i can tell you is that things will eventually work out for you . There's no permanent mess-up or mistake as time heals all wounds. There's always another chance.. stop being critical of yourself. Everyone has flaws.. it's how we overcome them that matters. It's how we beat them, and how we appreciate ourselves and make ourselves happy.

You're better than you think you are. And it's always going to be that way because you're stronger than you think you are, and you deserve better than to feel this way.

I'll always be here if you want someone to rant to. Pm me anytime!


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rant to me if there's anything!

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As usual... pm me if you are ever having a tough day, and I'll respond immediately.

You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
   
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