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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Fanatic Offline
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Thoughts going through my mind. - May 4th 2016, 12:51 AM

So, I suffer from moderate to severe depression and really anything can set me off in the deep end. Recently, I've been having a lot of family living problems and problems with work. Work sucks already and can't find somewhere where I'll feel completely stress-free and have time to collect my thoughts and cope. The upkeep with house's cleaning is outdated and we had just got over bug infection in my house. I think at my house, I always have to yell or argue with my family, because they can't be responsible, reasonable adults and clean up after themselves or even their kids. I'm down the boiling point to getting beyond pissed at them and all of this stress that I've been fighting off since December 2015 has affecting and setting off my depression in a more aggressive way. I never had suicide written in my mind since I was dealing with family problems when I was younger and now it's coming back. I can't get suicide off my mind and thoughts of cutting myself off my mind. The only safe place I had was my dorm and I don't go back in another four months. I just feel completely and utterly trapped in a situation that has made me lash out in other parts of my life where I wouldn't lash out so easily which is worrying me. I just want to be out of my workplace and of my home and live more securely and comfortable again. I'm afraid that I might do something dangerous if the situations keep making me stress to the point where I'll be emotionally numb and wont care whether I hurt myself or even die.



"I'm not a piece of cake for you to just discard
While you walk away with the frosting of my heart
So I'm taking back what's mine, you'll miss
The slice of heaven that I gave to you last night
." - "Cake" by Melanie Martinez


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Re: Thoughts going through my mind. - May 5th 2016, 01:51 PM

Hello.

I think that for you, you need to think about more positive things and not let any previous bad memories get into your mind. There's no point thinking about what has happened in the past because things will get better. Perhaps you might wanna try some meditation / mental exercises or perhaps just get into more fun stuff. I find that fun, happiness and good memories really help to take your mind off things and it'll really enable you to forget about any negative happenings that have taken place in your past. But there's also nothing wrong with other healthy releases...

Crying does help, but I hope it doesn't come to that. You've went through a lot... and you should only cry happy tears because you clearly are a responsible person who knows whats right from what's wrong.

It's tough, but I do think that you should rant out your feelings more often.. it'll also help you to relax, calm down and enjoy yourself. I just think that you need more things for you to look forward to in your life, and it's better if you really, really end up being happy, calm and the more outlets you have to rant to, the better. You should try diary-writing, music or some sports. Those will enable you to have more outlets to express yourself and this certainly helps.

I know that things will work out for you.. if you need anyone, I'll always be around. Always.


It's called a tunnel because there's ALWAYS a light at the end.



rant to me if there's anything!

http://www.teenhelp.org/private.php?do=newpm&u=27464

screwdriverneedsgas

As usual... pm me if you are ever having a tough day, and I'll respond immediately.

You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
   
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