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Exclamation Friend's Life is Falling Apart - November 16th 2016, 12:29 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

IF YOU ARE READING THIS MESSAGE, PLEASE READ ALL THE WAY THROUGH. I am at a loss, and I have come here for help. To give some backstory (this is not what the post is about), I found out that my best friend had hurt my other friend sexually who was his girlfriend at the time. I was so unbelievably angry at him that I never wanted to talk to him again, and I expressed how I felt to him. It is obvious now that there was a misunderstanding, and I will not go through all the details--long story short, he did not know what he was putting my other friend through because of a number of factors. I am aware that he may be lying and that it is solely his fault, but I had to forgive him, and I need help. Him and I have, on many different occasions, expressed how special we are to each other. I believe that he is my soul mate, not romantically, but inn my life. Anyway, now his whole life is falling apart. He has schizophrenia, dissociative identity disorder, complex PTSD from living in a harmful place located in Russia for the first half of his life, and has abusive parents. Something recently happened with his mother and the school guidance counselor found out. He is spiraling downwards. He has told me he sometimes feels a strong urge not to take his medication, he is having painful ringing in his ears, he hears his heartbeat, he is getting out of breath, sometimes everything goes black, etc. And usually, I am the person that can assist him. But he no longer feels that I care, because I hurt him. I did this because I thought he was a monster. He has made up with my other friend now, albeit she is still keeping her guard around him. I was, at a point, worried he would hurt someone who is now involved with him romantically, but he has made it clear that he will never hurt her. But I, on the other hand, am hurting so much. I am trying so hard to help, but he says he's lost me. That is one of the single most intense pains I've ever felt, that my soul mate feels I do not care, and he thinks there is nothing he can do about it. And now, along with the severe emotionally pain of what he thinks about me, I can't help him. He says he's lost his trust in himself, and I have, along with others, as well. He has attempted suicide multiple times before so I am extremely worried for him. I sent him this message to tell him how much he means to me:
Quote:
[NAME], despite the fact that [the situation in which I said I lost trust in you] only [happened] a few days ago, a lot has changed. I don't feel that way anymore. And what you said is not true. I haven't [lost trust in you]. I wont [lose trust in you]. I am just stuck right now and i need to cry because i never want you to feel this way and i am just beyond devastated to know that this is happening to you. you haven't lost my trust. i promise. i swear on my life you haven't lost my trust and you haven't lost me. please [NAME]. i cant let this happen." SECOND MESSAGE: "i cant let myself lose someone that i view more important than me. i just cant. i have never ever felt this pain before."
Someone, please help. I am struggling, and he is struggling. Thank you.
   
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Re: Friend's Life is Falling Apart - November 16th 2016, 02:51 AM

Hey, I'm really sorry such things are happening to both you and your friend. I think it's great that you've already told him how you feel so that he knows your perspective on things. If you could go into a little more detail, has he responded to the message? His response may change what you need to do about this situation. If he still feels he's lost you, maybe let him know that (already being told how much he means to you) you didn't just assist him all this time throughout different troubles for nothing and that nothing will change that. You've been through a lot together and you don't want to just throw it all away. Hope that (somewhat) helped. Good luck! Pm me if you ever wanna talk

-Jessica
   
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