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Unhappy I need help (for a close friend) - November 22nd 2016, 12:00 PM

So, a close friend of mine, his sister wants to put him on anti-depressants and I don't know what to do. I can't help but have my own opinions on anti-depressants shadow me and I don't know how to be there and understanding for him when I don't think he needs them. I have been on anti-depressants, did that for a couple years, saw people destroyed by them, have had several psychologists say that anti-depressants are a band aid solution but he got frustrated at me when I said I think he needs to wait and see what his psychologist says... I don't think he should try them, but I will support him in his decision but at the same time that is difficult? So, please help me, how can I tell him I support him without being all judgemental?

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Re: I need help (for a close friend) - November 22nd 2016, 12:26 PM

How old is this friend? Is his sister his legal guardian if he's a minor? You say you think he should wait to talk to his psychologist, do you mean she's trying to give them to him herself or has he seen a psychiatrist who prescribed them? He should absolutely not take any anti depressants he has not been prescribed by a doctor as it could be dangerous and is illegal in most, if not all, places.

As for your opinion on them, you can't decide what he does. It's unfortunate that you've had such bad experiences and seen such bad experiences but anti depressants can be life changing for a lot of people. I've had many friends on them, and I've seen them become so much more stable and happy. I've had friends who would have literally been dead without them. However, they aren't a fix alone. For them to be effective you really need to work through things by seeing a psychologist, therapist, etc. I was on them myself, though they didn't work because the cause of my problems was basically chronic sleep deprivation and wasn't mental illness. They don't work for everyone, it's not the best option for everything, but I think he should learn what works for him.

It sounds like he already knows how you feel about them, so to show you support him try to refrain from telling him what you think he should do. If he does choose to take them, don't make comments about it. It's possible he takes them and they work for him, it's also possible he takes them and they don't. Or he may choose not to try. If he does try, and it doesn't work out, refrain from any form of "I told you so" comments. You can also ask him, "what can I do to support you?"



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Re: I need help (for a close friend) - November 22nd 2016, 06:41 PM

Hey there,

It's rather unfortunate that you have had such a terrible time with Anti-depressants. I used to share the same view about them but then when I was seventeen I got in a very dark place and I attempted suicide. I ended up having to go on anti-depressants and eventually they stabilized me a little bit. Without my medications I would probably be dead right now.

I don't think it's wrong that your friend is considering anti-depressants and it's great that he has support from his sister. If they are considering this then it is likely that they are worried about what he is going through. I think him talking to his psychologist is a great idea but for some people psychology alone does not help diminish the depression. I mean, I had been i therapy for a while before I attempted suicide and it just wasn't working.

Medication should not be used without therapy in most cases and so it would be a good idea for your friend to discuss treatment options with his therapist and continue to see his therapist after going on medication.


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