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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Unhappy Suffering in silence - June 10th 2017, 01:18 PM

My mom was telling me today that i will be suicide at 18. She sayd its because "i sit in a dark room hours and feel sorry for my self. Because thats who i am". I stay in my room because i dont like her and i dont sit in a dark room and feel sorry for my self. I play on my damb phone. Right now i am 15 and suffering with depression in silence. As i have been for 3 years. I cant ask for help. Because all my mom would say is that its me feeling sorry for my self and looking for attention. And if she found out i cut. She would scream at me for making her look bad. Saying i only do it for attention. Saying that i probably go around showing people and telling them to feel bad for me. So i guess telling her is out of the picture. I just dont know what to do anymore. This is no way to live. (Not refurring to suicide)
   
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Re: Suffering in silence - June 10th 2017, 01:23 PM

There are so many mistakes. Im sorry please try to read around them ��
   
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Re: Suffering in silence - June 10th 2017, 03:04 PM

I'm so sorry for what your mother is putting you through. But hopefully you won't feel as lonely as you do now because you have this platform to share your worries with people who feel exactly the same as you. And please do not take into consideration what your mother has to say about your deppression we all know deppression and self harm is not a means of seeking attention, rather a means of coping, although it shouldn't be the means that anyone needs to resort to. Maybe you could see a therapist or someone you trust and talk to them behind your mother's back so her intefernce doesn't worsen your situation? If you ever need to talk to anyone, I'm always available!
   
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Re: Suffering in silence - June 10th 2017, 03:34 PM

I cant see a theripist behind her back because the only one that would be available to me is threw the school. And if they find out that this is how i feel they are obligated to call my parents. they have no choice in the matter. And if that happends my mom would get even more mad at me.
But thank u for giving the advice. I very much apritiate it.
   
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Re: Suffering in silence - June 10th 2017, 05:41 PM

Could you chat with the guidance counselor at school but be a little vague. You don't have to chat about your cutting, you could just talk about the depression. Typically they only have to tell your parents if you are hurting yourself, so you can always leave that part out.

Also, I can kind of relate to your situation with your mom. When I was going through what you are at your age, my mom didn't know how to handle any of it. So she was always angry with me. Later, I found out it wasn't because she didn't care but because she was scared but didn't know how to help. My school counselor and dad convinced her to let me see a therapist. I don't know if that resonates with you at all, or something you could try.

We are always here for you though. You don't have to battle this alone. Also, do you have any friends at school you can chat with? That will help, as well.
   
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Re: Suffering in silence - June 10th 2017, 07:56 PM

Thanks for the option. I didnt really think of that. And its not just depression she would react like that to, its everything. She thinks i do everything for attention. Or would do anything for it. And i dont think a theripist would really be an option for me. My mom would probably say that when i stop feeling bad for my self i will stop being depressed. Somthing along those lines.
Oh and yeah i have a few friends they know they just dont talk about it. I will tell them and then it never gets brought up again. My bestfriend cuts too so we dont really talk about that to much because we obviously dont want the other person to do it but we cant just sit there and be a hypocrite you know?
So yeah i dont really know what to do. Besides go on here and try to get help. Other than that there isnt much i can do.
   
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Re: Suffering in silence - June 20th 2017, 05:47 AM

Sorry to hear that you're going through so much. Your mom seems to be treating this badly, maybe she just doesn't know how to help? Try talking to a therapist or guidance counselor.
You don't have to go through this alone, we are all here for you. You may have lost the battle, but you haven't lost the war.




Life's a tough b**ch, but you are tougher. Go show it who's boss. <lots of love and hugs>
   
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