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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
TH Anonymous Offline
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Unhappy Made peace - February 18th 2018, 08:54 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I'm suicidal and I need help.

Last edited by Hypothesis.; March 5th 2018 at 05:59 AM. Reason: Removing goodbye note/editing to allow for support.
   
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Re: Made peace - February 19th 2018, 01:42 AM

I don't really know you. I do know, however, if you're struggling with ideas of suicide you must be hurting deeply, and for that I am sorry. You deserve happiness, and you deserve to live, and for you to think neither of those things is true anymore is something to mourn. I can't change your mind. If you want to go tomorrow then that's your choice; none of us can really stop you.

But I will say this: if you're posting it here, there must be some tiny voice inside that's telling you it doesn't want to die. That YOU don't want to die. And I think it's damn important to listen to that voice. It's there for a reason and it means something. Your life means something, even if you're feeling pain, even if it hurts, there's still meaning. I'm not going to give you bullshit about how suffering makes you stronger; while it does, it still sucks, and I don't think hearing that has ever really helped anyone, but I will tell you there's a better way. This doesn't have to be your only choice. This doesn't have to be the end. There can be more to your story.

I'm going to share something with you. It's one of my favorite poems, and I want a tattoo of it some day, when I can afford it. It says the following:

My highest ambition is to crawl
Out from underneath the wreckage
And laugh at all the things
That thought they could bury me.

When I get hopeless I think of this poem. I don't want to be buried alive by my moods, by the harm people have done to me. I want to live. I want to be more. And I know that you can be more too. You don't have to be buried either.

So get help. Go to your nearest emergency room, call emergency services, hell; call one of the hotlines listed at the top of this web page. There is more for you, I know it, and with help I think you can see it too.

Good luck to you. I hope you make the choice to live.


Love joins
Love unites
Love breaks us apart
The power to conquer here in our hearts
Enduring and sacred
Eternal as time
For love, love alone will conquer all


"A Million," by VNV Nation
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Re: Made peace - March 5th 2018, 06:18 AM

I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling right now and you should be proud of yourself for reaching out here. I agree with Jordan that the fact that you posted here shows that there's at least some part of you that would like to live. Hang on to any reasons that you can think of, even if you think it is something small. These things add up. This is a link to a list of reasons to live. There are so many on there that you are bound to find one that may fit you. Maybe you can even write down the reasons and keep them with you, or at least somewhere you may be able to see them when you are feeling down, so that way you always have something you can look at.

This is a list of alternatives and coping mechanisms you can use. If you are thinking of harming yourself, maybe one of these can help. For example, if you need a distraction we have a whole section of alternatives that work for that. While not every alternative works for every person, if you keep trying I'm sure you'll find a few that work.

This is a list of hotlines. While I definitely do recommend finding someone in your life that you can use for support and advice, a hotline is good in a crisis. It is also useful because they are anonymous and likely will be unbiased.

You are not alone, and I know you can do this.

-Dez


   
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Re: Made peace - March 5th 2018, 10:34 AM

[I am gonna share a story. I get bullied. have my whole life. but there is one gurl who i was friends with who would cut herself. I am also a cutter. This girl decided she wanted me expelled so she goes to the office and claims i was bullying her.(i wasn't) i get suspended. i go home and down a bunch of benadril. Then i regret, and here i doubt. needless to say i lived, but i should not have lived, God saved me. now i have quit cutting and am on the road to recovery, but i am going it alone. no one knows that i attempted suicide but you, so, i will heavily rely on you guys. i need to know if you all will be there for me and help me on my one manned journey to healthyness. message me if your with me.
   
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