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organizedchaos Offline
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Numbness - October 29th 2018, 05:02 AM

It's been a while since I've been on here but I didn't know where else to go.

The last time I felt like this was 10th grade when I was in a living hell trying to deal with my anxiety disorder on top of normal high school crap. I got pretty depressed and isolated myself and everything got worse and worse until I was in an extremely dark place that took about a year to pull myself out of once I started regularly seeing a therapist.

Now I'm in college and the stress of leaving my family and starting classes while adapting to this entirely new lifestyle caused me to relapse after a year of being in remission with my disorder. I'm thinking about going to the counseling center to talk to someone because I feel like I'm starting to slip down that path again and I really don't want to. On the other hand I haven't been able to get myself to go because I really don't want to see a therapist again, I don't have the time and I want to be able to handle it on my own.

My disorder makes me hate myself too. I feel like a complete loser and failure. The worst is that I can't ever get the thought that I'm a major disappoinment to my family out of my head, I feel like they deserve a better daughter. One who doesn't have a disorder that makes her a freak. I have zero self confidence at this point.

There's been more and more days lately where I feel like nothing is worth it and I just want to either sit and my dorm and ignore the world or just start running and never stop. It's getting to the point where I've started to think about death. Not killing myself, I'm not suicidal, just I think about how death looks really peaceful and easy when everything about life right now is so hard.

Some days I just walk from class to class and I just don't feel anything though and I don't know how to get rid of it. My whole body just feels numb and empty and nothing seems worth the effort. If anyone has tips on how to snap yourself out of these dazes that would be great.

Kay
   
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Latte Offline
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Re: Numbness - October 29th 2018, 04:47 PM

Have you considered taking an anti depressant? (They are for anxiety disorders too!) You can discuss it with your doctor, and they can decide if it is appropriate for you, and they'll get you what's right for you. It would be well worth your time to consider it if this interfering with your life because you say you don't have the time to commit to therapy, which is fair because it often involves more than just the 1 hour a week where you are at the therapists office (e.g. you get "homework"). Then you can at least function until you can go to therapy.
   
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Re: Numbness - November 8th 2018, 02:39 PM

I agree with the ator above, consult a doctor - such questions are not solved on the forums
   
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Re: Numbness - November 9th 2018, 07:55 AM

Totally agree with the previous posters! Don't search the web for the answers, just go to the doctor.


I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best
   
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Re: Numbness - November 10th 2018, 06:28 AM

Immediately and immediately go to the doctor, it can be anything. Take care of yourself, I hope everything will be fine with you.
   
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Londrniunat Offline
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Re: Numbness - November 10th 2018, 01:32 PM

With this is not a joke, go to the doctor.
   
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Re: Numbness - November 11th 2018, 04:24 PM

Seek medical attention immediately and urgently, this is your health!
   
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lourent Offline
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Re: Numbness - November 11th 2018, 05:40 PM

go to the doctor, he will helps u
   
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