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I can't control myself. - June 8th 2009, 12:42 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Im sat here rocking back and forward like a fucking mentalist.
Contemplating my suicide for the millionth time.
Hoping to get it right.
I'm so angry, I'm shaking.
I can't breathe, I just want to kill myself.
I want to cause pain.
I can't control myself.
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Re: I can't control myself. - June 8th 2009, 02:04 AM


Calm Down!
Deep breathe, it's going to be okay.
Your not a "mentalist," your just having a hard time right now.
You'll get through this!
Don't kill yourself, things might seem hard and unbearable right now but you can and you will get through this! You just have to fight! You can control yourself, you can get through this! Everything will be okay, PM me if you want to talk!

when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
we're not alone <3
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Re: I can't control myself. - June 8th 2009, 02:25 AM

You're sitting there and you're contemplating suicide, you say, for the millionth time. Think about all of the reasons why you haven't done it already. Now, I know what you're going to say. You're going to make up some excuse like "I am too scared" or something. That's wrong. Deep down, I'm sure that you know suicide isn't the answer to your problems.

What's making you feel the way you do? Is there something specific or is it just the combination of many things and it's finally taking a toll on you? Whatever the case is, an eighteen year old shouldn't be feeling the way you do. I'm sorry that you're currently experiencing this; it's probably not a nice feeling.

Does anyone know that you're currently feeling the way you are? I know it might not be an easy subject to talk about but believe me, it could potentially make the world of a difference for you. There are so many people who care about you and do not want to see anything happen to you. It seems like you're battling a lot right now and you must be a very strong person. Not everyone is able to handle as much as you are right now.

Unfortunately, there are many things in life that we aren't able to cope with on our own. This kind of thing is one of them. Talk to someone about the way you're feeling. You don't necessarily have to seek mental help. You can talk to an adult that you trust; just tell someone.

Do you have any hobbies or anything? Sometimes when I feel down or upset, I listen to music - music that describes how I feel. I know that may sound corny and everything but it helps me a lot. Another friend of mine exercises when she feels down. You need to find some kind of coping mechanism to help you get through these rough times.

Unfortunately, there will always be times where you'll feel down in life. It is during times like these that you need to lean on your close friends and family members who love you very much. I know you can get through whatever it is that you're battling now. Giving up shouldn't be an option. [:

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Re: I can't control myself. - June 8th 2009, 11:22 AM

I went to see my doctor this morning at 'talk'...and coz I OD'd last night. He's calling me back for tests and now I'm scared. Ugh. ):
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Re: I can't control myself. - June 15th 2009, 03:26 AM

Hey LJ,
Don't be scared they will try and help you through it the best they can. Let us know how it goes and if anything they say they can help you with sounds even the slighest bit useful to you do consider it may not be the perfect answer but i'm sure it will help you out. All the best and if you ever wanna talk drop me a line.
Take care
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Re: I can't control myself. - June 15th 2009, 03:53 AM


Being scared is reasonable, I think a lot of people go through that when they have to talk to their doctors or get tests. But, don't be afraid because the doctor wants to help you and he will not do something that will harm you.

Please stay safe and let us all know what happened with your doctor and pm or aim me if you need someone to talk to.

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