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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
xCoralinex94 Offline
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Name: Carrie
Age: 25
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Join Date: April 8th 2009

.... - June 17th 2009, 12:53 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

im tired of this.. i just want to end it all tonight.... i keep messing up.. im just in everyones way itd be better if i wasnt here. everyone would be happier better off in the end.... i hate myself, i dont evn get y im here. i just wish i could freakin die already!!!! i could just end it tonight... i want to so bad.... srry for wastin evryones time..

380 days SH free
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
silentmuffin Offline
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Re: .... - June 17th 2009, 12:59 AM

If you don't even value your own life, why are you so worried about wasting other people's time? If you're feeling this badly, now is the time to focus on YOU and find reasons to live, even if that means being "in the way" of some people...which in reality, you're not in the way at all. The people around you love you and don't want you to die.

Aš tave myliu, Nanny. I'm carrying your love with me.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Em... Offline
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Re: .... - June 17th 2009, 02:34 AM

Even though to you it may seem that you are worthless, you need to try to think a bit more optimistic. The people around you need you and love you, they don't want to see you go.
You could end it all tonight, but please don't. The next day will come, make something of yourself. I believe you have it in you, just please try.
Try to do something a bit relaxing to get your mind off of how you are feeling, escape from the world by taking a long bath, or start an arts project, and maybe you will feel better afterwards.
You aren't wasting anyone's time. We are here to help you. You even made the effort to post this, so it's great! It shows that you are asking for help to some extent. You made it this far, so please keep on going.
Like I said I believe that you have it in you to see tomorrow's light. So please stay. I know it's difficult, but there are much greater things to come for you.

You can PM me anytime if you want to talk. Take care hun.
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: .... - June 18th 2009, 12:45 AM

I've always found that it's the little things that keep me going. I once went to sleep with the full intention of ending it the next day. I wake up, and the sun was shining into my bedroom, and I started listening to my favorite song, and soon, I was feeling so incredibly alive, that I couldn't bear to think of ending it.

  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: .... - June 18th 2009, 07:08 PM

Hey there Carrie.

It seems as though you're really struggling right now. I'm sorry that you're hurting so much now, you don't deserve to be feeling this bad and you don't have to feel this way forever.

Ending your life is not the answer to anything. What do you think suicide would achieve, Carrie? No one knows what happens when we die apart from it hurting people who are still left to grieve.
When you're upset and feeling depressed or suicidal it can be easy to forget that there's a lot of people who care about you and would not want you to come to any harm. Even if you don't believe it, you have to know that there is always someone who cares about you and someone who cares.
You are not wasting anyones time, we all need help sometime or another. I'm glad that you still have some hope and are posting here to ask for some help. That takes a lot of courage and it's really great that you're managing to talk to us about how you're feeling. Do you think that you could manage to talk to an adult about how you are feeling, such as a parent or relative? If you don't feel comfortable with that, you could talk to a school counsellor or doctor or even a hotline.

There are plenty of reasons to live. Whether it is music, reading, sport, career prospects, friends, family, beautiful scenery, whatever. There's always something to aspire to, something to appreciate - you just need to start identifying these things, Carrie. You may find it useful to keep a diary and write down 5 things you've seen/done each day which has made you smile.

We're always here for you, you can get through this!
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
i_am_me_again Offline
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Re: .... - June 18th 2009, 07:59 PM

Hi Carrie

im tired of this.. i just want to end it all tonight.... i keep messing up.. im just in everyones way itd be better if i wasnt here.

Im sorry you feel this way. What proof do you have that makes you feel like you are messing up. You probably feel negative about yourself, because you feel that you keep mesing up. If you where to start telling yourself to believe you can make it, the slowly you would realise that you dont mess everything up.
Your not in anyones way at all. So many people care about you. It would not be better if you wernt here. It would be horrible if you decided to end your life. A good friend of mine commited suicide because she felt the same way....the affect was devasting. Please. Realise you are not alone & you deserve to be happy & live a full happylife.

everyone would be happier better off in the end.... i hate myself, i dont evn get y im here. i just wish i could freakin die already!!!! i could just end it tonight... i want to so bad.... srry for wastin evryones time..

Everyone wouldnt be happier or better off in the end, infact the opposite. You dont know what youve got untill youve got it & I believe you HAVE GOT IT. You can survive. Just believe in yourself.

Its normal to feel like you want to hurt yourself, even kill yourself. I find that at times I feel the same way. But, the feelings do go....you just have to help yourself. Instead of doing negative things, do positive things,...have a bath...sing a song.
Suicide is not the answer.
Things are rock bottom...cant get any worse....so why not wait untill things improve, because if things cant get worse, they are bound to get better.

Is there anyone you could talk to..like a teacher or counsellor...or relative?

If you need help, then you should get somewhere safe.

I have faith in you & I think you can pull through. It wont be easy, but you have the strenght.

My inbox is alway open, so PM whenever


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It hits its high and low notes,
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