TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Imaginary Offline
Member
Average Joe
***
 
Imaginary's Avatar
 
Location: Arkham Asylum, Gotham City

Posts: 193
Join Date: January 14th 2009

How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 03:55 AM

I really hate myself. No, I can't go to a counselor or parent/teacher/whatever, I just need to know how to do this myself.

How do I stop hating myself?


myspace.com/lonesome_fish for poetry. I like feedback sometimes. And I like smiley faces .
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
MadPoet Offline
You're the Original <3
Outside, huh?
**********
 
MadPoet's Avatar
 
Name: Amanda.
Age: 23
Gender: Female.
Location: Michigan.

Posts: 4,685
Blog Entries: 121
Join Date: January 8th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:08 AM

Hey :] I know how you're feeling right now, as I'm frequently in this situation myself. I think that one of the main problems, based on my experiences, is that often when you feel like this about yourself, you tend to put yourself down a lot. Would you say that this often true about yourself? That maybe this dislike of yourself is caused by a lack of confidence? If that's the case, I'd simply try to monitor your thinking a bit more often. For instance, try to catch yourself when you're thinking negatively about yourself. Every time you do catch yourself, replace that negative thought with something positive about yourself. That way, the positive thoughts may cancel out the negative thoughts. Pay more attention to the things that you do like about yourself, rather than the flaws that you find in yourself. I know this is all easier said than done, but with a bit of work it gets easier and easier.





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Imaginary Offline
Member
Average Joe
***
 
Imaginary's Avatar
 
Location: Arkham Asylum, Gotham City

Posts: 193
Join Date: January 14th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:09 AM

Okaaay, but I don't like anything about myself. That's why I'm riddled with hate.

Thanks anyway.


myspace.com/lonesome_fish for poetry. I like feedback sometimes. And I like smiley faces .
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
dancer Offline
love, anonymous
I've been here a while
********
 
dancer's Avatar
 
Age: 28
Gender: Female

Posts: 1,234
Join Date: March 25th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:11 AM

Hey you

Do you know why you hate yourself? Figuring out why and then trying to find ways to change that might help.

And hey, you do have a whole lot to like about yourself, anyway

Hang in there.


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Imaginary Offline
Member
Average Joe
***
 
Imaginary's Avatar
 
Location: Arkham Asylum, Gotham City

Posts: 193
Join Date: January 14th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:14 AM

I've spent my entire life changing myself. fine tuning my shitty self and aparently it doesn't work. I still hate myself.

Thanks though. I really do need suggestions; I'm fucking dead otherwise.


myspace.com/lonesome_fish for poetry. I like feedback sometimes. And I like smiley faces .
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
MadPoet Offline
You're the Original <3
Outside, huh?
**********
 
MadPoet's Avatar
 
Name: Amanda.
Age: 23
Gender: Female.
Location: Michigan.

Posts: 4,685
Blog Entries: 121
Join Date: January 8th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:18 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Imaginary View Post
Okaaay, but I don't like anything about myself. That's why I'm riddled with hate.

Thanks anyway.
Well then, you're simply not focusing on your good qualities. Like I said, pay attention for the things that you do right in life for awhile, and I'm sure that after awhile you will realize that you have just as many, if not more, positive qualities as compared to negative. It's easy to ignore what we do right in life and simply jump to the conclusion that we never do anything that makes us a good person, but the thing is that no matter what anyone says about us, each and every one of us has good qualities waiting to be discovered. If you can't think of enough good qualities about yourself, simply try to cut the negative thinking all together. All the awful things you say about yourself, when you catch yourself saying those things, simply convince yourself that those things are not true - that you're a good person, that you have good qualities, just as everyone else does. If you let those negative opinions of yourself completely take over, then obviously you're going to feel this way. But you have power over how you think of yourself. If there's something you despise about yourself, then change it. But also realize that everyone has imperfections, but real strength and beauty comes from being able to accept those imperfections. Anyway, sorry this was so long

If you ever need to talk, you're always welcome to PM me. Take care :]





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
.:Bibliophile:. Offline
PM me anytime!

TeenHelp Veteran
*************
 
.:Bibliophile:.'s Avatar
 
Gender: Just me

Posts: 16,313
Blog Entries: 1722
Join Date: January 18th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:21 AM

Hey,

Dancer is right. You have to figure out the reasons behind your hatred for yourself and then come to terms with those feelings. If you do not know the feelings behind your self hatred you can't really fix it because you won't be dealing with the feelings involved.

After you figure out the feelings behind your self-hatred something that could help is making a list of five or more things that you like about yourself and reminding yourself on a daily basis that you have these good qualities.

For example:

I have a nice smile
I am a good listener

And you repeatedly say those things over and over to yourself; it does help.

If you can't think of anything ask a friend for help(or someone on here maybe?) and use what they tell you.

After a while, hopefully, you will start to feel better about yourself and your list will grow.

Please hang in there and if you need anything please feel free to pm me.


|Lead Moderator|Newsletter Officer|
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
dancer Offline
love, anonymous
I've been here a while
********
 
dancer's Avatar
 
Age: 28
Gender: Female

Posts: 1,234
Join Date: March 25th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:28 AM

Well then we'll keep finding suggestions.

Maybe don't try to "change" yourself, but "add." For example, instead of saying "I don't like how I'm not confident," try saying "I'm going to try to look even strangers in the eye." Instead of focusing on not not liking a behavior, you're just adding one that you do like.

What do you think?

Hang in there. PM me anytime!


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Imaginary Offline
Member
Average Joe
***
 
Imaginary's Avatar
 
Location: Arkham Asylum, Gotham City

Posts: 193
Join Date: January 14th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:53 AM

Hey, I've made a list! Lookie! I'm kind of proud, not really...

Why I Should Like Myself!

I can steal shit. Iím an okay shoplifter, which Iím kindaí proud of.
UhhhÖ. Iíve faced most of my known fears, other than heights and my mother.
Iím kindaí smart, I guess. But my brains arenít applicable to any real life situation so Iím pretty useless in that area.
As far as I know, Iím not afraid of death, so thatís a plus. Itís kind of admiral I guess.
I uhhhhÖ. Can see/sense the future occasionally. Although this is more a result of God trying to keep me alive for some strange reason.
Wow, Iím pretty delusional.
I whine a lot. I mean, look at all my old posts. Geez, Iím an ickle baby!
Okay, okay, focus. Good things, good thingsÖ
I have some good ideas. But I never bring them into fruition because I hate myself, and Iím lazy, and I donít like people making fun of me.
Iím pretty annoying. I guess that can come in handy sometimes. Like in the movies where the annoying kid does something heroic because of their irksomeness.
I can read kindaí fast. Except when I get a lapse in memory and forget what the fuck is going on and have to retract. FUuuuuck.
My mother buys me things sometimes. I know that doesnít really have anything to do with me, and what she buys is usually shit, but I felt it needed to be mentioned.
I can make all manner of popping noises with my mouth! There! Not a lot of people can do that.
I think I could do a lot of things if I didnít hate myself. Thatís sort of depressing actually when I realize how little Iíve actually done to make myself better and improve on my skills and shitÖ GRR!
Iím sure I could be a real prominent persun if I didnít hate myself.
I reeeeeaaallly hate myself for that last thing.
Shit. This is hard. What the fuck do I have to do to become confident and such? Grrrr fuck midgetsí assholes in the monkey ice cream factory!
I can snap the normal way. Thatís something I guess.
OH! Iím kindaí good at cutting myself! And burning myself is something Iím moderately not complete shit at. Well, Iíve only done it a few times. Although, Iím not like champion cutter of the flame either. Iím slightly above average in that department.
When I trick myself into not hating myself, I can make womin moist in the pants. Itís more fun if theyíre married and think theyíre straight.
Iím stupidÖ. wait, thatís not a good oneÖ. Fuuuuck!
Iím going to kill myself Iím going to kill myself Iím going to kill myself Iím going to kill myself.

Fuuuck! WHY DO I SUCK SO MUCH ASS!?!


Iím pretty sure I know why I hate myself. My mother. And I donít really know how to deal with that. Just being in her presence makes me want to press the back of my throat on a pair of open scissors (you win an internet if you guess the movie).

Thanks for the help. I don't know if that worked, but I feel a little better.


myspace.com/lonesome_fish for poetry. I like feedback sometimes. And I like smiley faces .
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
dancer Offline
love, anonymous
I've been here a while
********
 
dancer's Avatar
 
Age: 28
Gender: Female

Posts: 1,234
Join Date: March 25th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 05:05 AM

Why is the fact that you're a good writer not on their? Your writing always has a lot of character. Definitely not insipid.

So anyway, that needs to be on there

Don't worry about what you may or may not have done up till now. Just realize that hey, you can be a pretty awesome person, and instead of lamenting that you haven't yet, just focus on trying to start being that person. It's awesome that you've face most of your fears - now work on facing your obstacles.

Not so sure about the cutting and burning thing... maybe try to keep your list to things that are productive, healthy for you. To things that build you up, rather than hurt you.

Please don't kill yourself. You stand out, which is an amazing thing to do. And you mean a lot to me as a friend. When things feel overwhelming, please find some way to take care of yourself, to find a way to let out all your frustration without taking it out on you.

Hang in there.


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
TheWhiteTornado Offline
Member
Senior TeenHelper
*******
 
TheWhiteTornado's Avatar
 
Name: Jack
Age: 25
Gender: Male

Posts: 786
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 06:07 AM

Try this (it helped me). Start giving advice where you can on this site, and do it more and more often. Eventually you may come to realize that, if nothing else, you're managing to help others, and through that you become more and more pleased with what you're doing and the kind of person you're becoming. It sounds weird, but it genuinely feels good to know that you've managed to help others and it gives you a sense of purpose.


"What do we live for, if not to make life less difficult for each other?"
-George Eliot

"Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
-Groucho Marx

"Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin."
-Grace Hansen
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
AshtrayHeart Offline
Human Wreckage
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
AshtrayHeart's Avatar
 
Name: Jess.
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Location: Suffolk, England.

Posts: 591
Blog Entries: 5
Join Date: July 11th 2009

Re: How do I stop hating myself? - July 11th 2009, 04:42 PM

Try to think of a positive thing about yourself or do everyday, I hope it slowly helps.
It's hard to like yourself sometimes I know, but you just have to have more faith in yourself and believe in yourself more.


'Cause there's no pride to be found when you follow sheep around..

<3 15/3/09 <3
11 months, I love you.
  Send a message via MSN to AshtrayHeart  
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
hating, stop

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright ©1998-2018, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.