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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
UltraViolet Offline
Emotionally Unstable
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Name: Lea
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Join Date: January 6th 2009

Last night... - March 26th 2010, 02:29 PM

i felt empty
really numb
really alone
and i realised...the fight is more pointless now than ever
everythin in my mind, my body, myself...i just want to die
its all i could think, the tears just started...
i only saw my threapist 8 hours before and he was giving me new ideas/ways to try and cope.
And i said to him there and then 'what if it doesnt work? what if i cant do it?'
i knew i would fail.
so now its all just about time
when and how i suppose
im exhausted of life, of people, of living, im to tired of everything

'thanks to you i never trusted...'
- Boy Kill Boy

This depression is a killer...
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Pour the Teapot Offline
Train whistles and cicadas
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Re: Last night... - March 26th 2010, 03:40 PM

ok Lea, calm down. things will get better, trust me. try using the coping skills your counscler taught you, because i bet they will help. by posting on here, you have proved that you don't really want to die. things will look up. just hang in there! PM me anytime.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
NuHalo Offline
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Re: Last night... - March 26th 2010, 11:04 PM

It may give you peace of mind to know that others are suffering as much as you are. And most, moreso. If it doesn't then maybe it will tell you that your problems aren't so bad, at least you have ways to fix them and get back on your feet.

It isn't worth it moping around and wondering what is on the other side of life. What is held in death, because it is what it is. Death. If there is no point in living then there is no point in dying either. It's just as pointless as life.

That is, until you find yourself a reason to live. You find it eventually.. everyone does. Just take your time now and keep searching for it. Then you will find that death is just the next part of life, but you have a reason to live, after all.

Take care.

Click here to PM me any time, I'm here to help you if you want to talk to someone.

Beware lest you lose the substance, by grasping at the shadow. - The Dog and the Shadow, Aesop
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fuzzycosmicears Offline
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Join Date: March 26th 2010

Re: Last night... - March 26th 2010, 11:51 PM

One way I looked at it when I went through a state of mind where I had thoughts about suicide was "How can nothing be better than this?" It can't. Because what you have is life. Something that, when analyzed, is very complex on the creation. It amazes me still how we are created for 9 months until birth. The truth is you can not undo it. Whether or not you realize it, you leave loved ones behind. Committing suicide is not the way to handle/cope with a situation. There are people out there who want to help you such as your counselor. The only way the new ways your counselor was telling you to try would not work is if you refuse to let them work. They may not work immediately, so give it some time.
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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
WillO'Wisp Offline
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Re: Last night... - March 27th 2010, 12:54 AM

I think your depression persists because you are not looking at things in a more positive, optimistic form, and you are not believing in yourself.
You need to want to get better and believe you can, and try to look at the positive side of things and all the good things in your life and yourself that keep you going, remember you are strong and keep telling yourself you can get through this because you can. Build yourself up and keep believing in yourself. The greatest strength is within yourself, even if you don't know it yet, you will discover it if you just try hard enough.
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