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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Frangelina Offline
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Name: Fran
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: UK

Posts: 42
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Join Date: January 13th 2009

So, This Is How It Is. - May 9th 2010, 02:46 PM

Im going to die.
END OF!

Things are starting to slip, Im not hearing voices but I know I will be soon as Im stopping my medication. My mood is getting worse and Im starving myself again.
I dont have any college or 6th form to go to. I don't have any friends who live near me (only people I met through the hospital) and hardly any of my favourite clothes fit me now and i don't have a job.

if nothing is going to go my way then I wonder why I am still living this shit life?

like seriously (i can see this is turning into a rant) whats the point in living when I cant get a job because i have schizophrenia, i cant get into college because I was in hospital and missed the deadline to apply.

WHAT IS THE POINT?

God I hate myself soo much I just want to die. Why is it so hard to kill yourself?

anyway that is all

chesca xox


LIVE

LOVE

LIFE

   
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Name: Anna
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Location: UK

Posts: 1,101
Blog Entries: 122
Join Date: February 18th 2010

Re: So, This Is How It Is. - May 9th 2010, 07:19 PM

Hey there Fran,

It is only hard when it isn't the right time. I know how you feel, I know how hard life can be. But the fact you have reached out to us for help shows that it isn't all that you want - there is still a glimmer of hope inside you. You don't deserve to be feeling like this, not at all. But you are strong - you have shown that, and I believe you can get through it. Things will get better for you, I promise, but it will just take time.

Have you tried talking to your Local Education Authorities or the Colleges near you? Given that you had a valid reason for not filling an application in on time, they might make an allowance? It would be worth looking into yes? Even if you can't this time, there is always next year - I know it seems far away but it could come quicker than you think.

Why is it that you are stopping your medication? Because you don't like it or because the doctor or whoever says you should? For whatever reason, I think you need to talk to your doctor again about how you are feeling about it all, and how you are struggling at the moment. People can only help you if they know exactly what is going on for you.

You don't need to starve yourself Fran, you are beautiful as you are. I know that is hard to believe - I struggle to believe it myself. But it is true. You are stunning the way you are. Thin isn't neccessarily pretty either, not at all. Beauty is more than being thin. It is about being happy with yourself. But, being thin won't satisfy that.

I hope things start to look up for you, stay strong and keep fighting right? You can do this.
PM me if you ever need anything alright?
Take care.
Anna




You have to have the negative things in life
to be able to appreciate the positives.
TG 05/04/2013
   
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