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sarah679 Offline
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frightened to open up - July 13th 2010, 06:14 AM

im so frightened to open up. its like i want to. and i know it will help. and ive found a councillor that i like and trust. but its so hard. i just cant do it. ive grown up just relying on myself. and getting me out of everything. ive always kept everything inside. please help!
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Re: frightened to open up - July 13th 2010, 06:44 AM

Hi Ella,
I have to say I really know what you're going through. My first few months of seeing my psychologist were tough - I just couldn't give her the necessary details and I was so terrified she would judge me! Keep in mind that councillors deal with all sorts of problems, they chose their job because they love to do so. As humans, we can not do everything ourselves; sometimes we just need that helping hand. Maybe even try voicing your concerns about opening up directly to your councillor. He or she may help you build trust and form stronger lines of communication.
Best of luck!
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Re: frightened to open up - July 13th 2010, 07:48 AM

Perhaps you can't talk about how you are doing then, maybe writting it and give it to your councillor would help her to know how you've been feeling, and what made you feel that way. You can work about it then. Once your therapist knows, it'd be easier to talk
You can overcome this
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Re: frightened to open up - July 13th 2010, 03:52 PM

Don't push yourself to talk about everything right away or in one go. Building trust and allowing yourself to seek support with these things takes time. Work on it gradually. Maybe start off by talking to your councilor about small things and try to talk to her about something new each day. Any start can help, and after a while you might start to find you become more comfortable with talking and will be able to tell her more. Take it easy and work at your own pace. Hope everything works out.

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Re: frightened to open up - July 15th 2010, 08:50 AM

Hey there.
First off, it's great you've found a counsellor you like, and you've realised that opening up will help.
Not being able to open up to people, even a counsellor (who you know won't judge or criticise you), is actually quite common. Most people who go through therapy are hesitant at first.
Don't expect miracles - if you're used to keeping things to yourself, it will take a while to start to open up to anyone. Maybe try it bit by bit. Reveal a little about yourself, then a little more, and see how that goes.
Or, as the others have suggested, maybe try writing things down? That can be a lot easier than actually speaking about things.
Or even just tell your counsellor you're not comfortable opening up just yet, and the two of you can work through it.
Good luck with everything.

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Re: frightened to open up - July 15th 2010, 11:43 PM

I understand how you have troubles opening up and trusting people but this Councillor you are seeing, you like him/her, so that's a start. Just try talking to them and opening up to them about personal things because they can't tell anyone about anything, because if they did they'd be sued and fired, and they are professionals so you can trust them to talk about things you couldn't with other people.
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