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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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suicide - August 24th 2010, 08:15 PM

I think about suicide excessively. I think about how I want to kill myself, I think about the chances are of succeeding in killing myself are depending on the method I use, I think about if I'll have the courage to go through with it if I do get up to actually trying to kill myself, I think about what'll happen to me after I die if I kill myself, and I think of what happens to people after they die in general. I've never told anyone about this before, I've always been too scared that they'd tell on me and I'd get forced into a psych ward. You're all probably going to tell me to get counselling or some shit for this now to help me not feel suicidal anymore, but the truth is I don't want to be rid of these feelings, I just want to release them so they're not pent up inside me anymore, they have a place in reality and not just inside my head. I want to write down why I feel this way, but it's very long and difficult to write it down, a lot of the things that are causing me to feel this way (what's happened in the past, etc) it's really hard to think about, so I'll just leave it at this.
   
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Re: suicide - August 24th 2010, 08:35 PM

u shud keep a journal, and when you're feeling like this just write and write about how you're feeling. it's a way to get out that sort of energy, and it'll also help you figure out ways to cope better when you look back on it. (i know this from experience)


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Re: suicide - August 24th 2010, 08:43 PM

I have written about it in a journal before, and it doesn't help. I only feel relief when I tell other people about it.
   
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Re: suicide - August 24th 2010, 08:50 PM

would a blog help? that way you don't necessarily have to be near someone who you can tell, but when you're feeling bad you can just post it on your blog for your friends/family to see. if you did make a blog, i'd follow it
if you ever really just need to talk though, then I'm here to PM


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Re: suicide - August 24th 2010, 08:53 PM

I don't want to make a blog who people I know in real life can see, because I'm scared of letting them know about my thoughts on suicide which I one day might go through with because I'm too scared that they'll tell someone on me to get me locked up in a psych ward.
   
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Re: suicide - August 24th 2010, 08:59 PM

I've been in a "psych ward", and quite honestly they aren't that bad. But look, I understand that, so unless you are truly in immediate danger, for now just talk to us on here - everyone here is understanding and supportive. Like I said, feel free to PM me if you need/want.
If you are really in danger of dying, trust me, go to people. Reach out to friends or family - they'll help. Going to a psychiatrical hospital is much better and much less permanent then death. We're here for you, so try to hold in there dude.


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Re: suicide - August 25th 2010, 01:08 AM

I know exactly what you're talking about. I get in moods where I have to consciously make sure I don't kill myself with household items. (I won't continue with this for fear of getting graphic.)
   
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Re: suicide - August 25th 2010, 02:02 AM

Without coming off rude, these forums are here to help people with those feelings that's not normal nor is it sane that you don't want help. So being here on a support website what is you aim - what is your question? How can we begin to help you if you don't want to change these thoughts.

I believe life has a purpose and living your life to the fullest while your alive. I don't see all the hype about dieing, everyone in the past has died along with everyone to come in the future why speed up what is certain when life was a gift and only comes once...
   
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Re: suicide - August 27th 2010, 08:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryan1 View Post
Without coming off rude, these forums are here to help people with those feelings that's not normal nor is it sane that you don't want help. So being here on a support website what is you aim - what is your question? How can we begin to help you if you don't want to change these thoughts.

I believe life has a purpose and living your life to the fullest while your alive. I don't see all the hype about dieing, everyone in the past has died along with everyone to come in the future why speed up what is certain when life was a gift and only comes once...
I do want help, just not help to not feel suicidal anymore. There are things in my life which I can't change which make it so I can't live my life to the fullest. As for death, when I think of killing myself, I don't think about death itself but what'll happen after I die so it's not really like that...
   
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Re: suicide - August 28th 2010, 02:50 AM

Hey there,

There are things in life that cannot be changed but that does not mean that you cannot live life to the fullest. What you have to do is come to terms with the things you cannot change, accept them and move on. Of course that is easier said then done but it is possible.

Reaching out for help would be a great way to come to terms with those things. I know that my therapy has helped me to slowly come to accept and cope with the things I cannot change. It is still a long and involved process, one I get tired of on occasion, but the more I accept and cope with it the 'happier' I become.

You will not always have to feel this suicidal but you need to reach out and work on the things that are causing you to feel this way. Life has a lot to offer but sometimes we have to get past all the bad that has happened before we can see it. I believe that you can get past the bad too.

I know you are afraid of getting sent to a hospital but they are not necessarily the worst places ever. The staff is usually pretty nice and they want to see the patients get better. They work with them and listen to them and allow them to get stable before pushing them back out to the real world. And, the thing to remember is that you don't, in most cases, get sent to the hospital for having thoughts of suicide. A lot of therapists don't really want to see their patient go there so they do what they can to help you without taking that step. But, if you eventually had to go there it would not be the end of the world and the doctor would only being doing it to ensure your safety.

Please hang in there and best of luck,

Jenna


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Re: suicide - August 30th 2010, 01:36 AM

Hey there

You're doing a really good thing by reaching out to us on TeenHelp.

What Jenna said is true. Chances are you're not going to get sent to a hospital just because you're having suicidal thoughts or feelings. I think for starters you should talk to a friend about how you're feeling and tell them you want help. You won't always feel as bad as you do.


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Re: suicide - August 30th 2010, 12:59 PM

Hey,

I myself has experienced the same feelings. As previous posts I have seen have said, talk to somebody you trust...maybe a friend, parent, sister, brother etc...there are so so many people that can help you release your feelings. There are also many people on here, willing to help.

Hope everything is okay for you, if you'd like to talk, please PM me

Lex-Fauzia.
   
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