Can't Take Anymore Of It

[Metal♥Lover]

I've had enough. I can't fucking deal with my parents alchohol problems anymore. It's bringing me down. They always fight and drag me into it. The house always smells like beer and pot smoke-it makes me sick. I'm done trying to get them to see how badly them doing this hurts me. My mom knows that the reason I cut is because she and dad drink. But she's sitting here in the livingroom drunk right now. That shows me she doen't care. I know quitting would be hard for them, but they haven't even been making an effort.

I'm just done with it all-done trying to talk some sense into them, done trying to get them to understand. I'm not going to confide in my mom anymore if she's not going to help me through this. I need a knife. I think I'll steal one from the kitchen drawer and hide it in my room. Cutting is my only best friend now, the only thing that makes me feel better. Venting doesn't help. Confiding in a close friend doesn't help. None of the SH alternatives even work. I can't escape. I know they won't stop drinking, even for me. They've been doing this kind of thing since before I was born, why the hell should I believe that they would quit now? I'm not stupid, I know that they won't do anything to quit. I wish there was another trusted adult in the picture, but there isn't.

[Thirteen]

What about school? There has to be a trusted adult there, like a guidance councellor.

As far as your parents go, perhaps you should talk to them both? Maybe if they both know what's up, they'll better figure out how to take care of it, I guess.

[Metal♥Lover]

Originally Posted by -ArcAngel-

What about school? There has to be a trusted adult there, like a guidance councellor.

As far as your parents go, perhaps you should talk to them both? Maybe if they both know what's up, they'll better figure out how to take care of it, I guess.

Well, I really don't trust ANY of the adults at school, not even the guidance counselor. I have my reasons for this, but I would prefer not to share them if that is acceptable.

As for talking to both parents, it won't do a thing. They both know it hurts me, even though my last post makes it seem as though my mom is the only one that knows. But my dad knows it too.

[Thirteen]

Its acceptable to not talk about it.

And well, last you said, you mentioned that your mom knew but your dad didn't, but yes, things can change.

Don't you have another family member to confide in, at least? Or a doctor?

[Metal♥Lover]

Originally Posted by -ArcAngel-

Its acceptable to not talk about it.

And well, last you said, you mentioned that your mom knew but your dad didn't, but yes, things can change.

Don't you have another family member to confide in, at least? Or a doctor?

Well, I said my dad doesn't know that I cut but he does know that him and mom drinking hurts me.

I honestly can't confide in another family member because my whole family knows about my parents' problems and how it affects me, but it's sort of an "off limits" discussion. I don't take regular trips to the doctor either, that's kinda something you don't talk about with doctors here. You talk with them about your depression, but you don't tell them about what your parents do, if that makes sense.

[teen spirit]

How about talking to a friend's mom or dad...they may be able to help in some way.

My parents are both alcoholics. No matter how much I want them to change...unless they want to change...it isn't going to happen. That I know for sure because I lived it and continue to live it. I now know that they drink because they look for their "escape" from their own lives. I am not saying that it is right...its just what they are doing to numb their problems.

You talking about cutting is also your way of "numbing" how you feel. It doesn't make the pain go away...it just creates temporary solution for you and also an addiction that you will have to somehow overcome. It's not your answer...

Talking to someone you trust won't make your parents stop the drinking and drugs but what it will do for you is release your feelings in a more constructive way. I know you love your parents and don't want to jeopardize your living arrangements with them so I can understand why you don't want to speak with someone at school. That is why I suggest perhaps a trusted parent of a friend-they may be able to provide the support and guidance that will help you.

I feel really bad for you because I know what it was like for me...I no longer live at home but that is because I am older and made that decision as I no longer wanted to be in that environment. But when I was your age...I found positive people and got involved in things (sports, groups etc) that kept me away from my home and being a witness to what I hated...it really helped me focus on what was important to me and what I wanted in my life.

I hope this helped a bit...

[clairvoyant]

this might sound like harsh advice but this is my personal opinion of your situation.
If I was in your situation and my parents' actions where causing emotional conflict with my emotions; to the point I SH. And talking hasn't gone anywhere I would have to take myself out of that abusive and destructive household. I would call child services and explain the situation. And sometimes this is the wake up call parents need. I've seen child services put kids in a home and when the parents got clean they would appeal to have their children back. If the drinking doesn't stop and you're cutting right now, I personally don't see it getting any better unless something is changed and that's the first thing that came to my mind.
Whatever you decide to do, will be the right choice.
As Einstein said, Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

[Charlie1230]

I don't know what to say. If my parents were that bad with drinking I would call the cops. They are bad parents for drinking and being drunk. They need to have sence talked into them!