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Unhappy why im i so willing to kill my self rather than to change - November 19th 2010, 10:48 PM

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i was searching the internet to get info on serquel because thats what i take and it was to see how much i needed to kill myself and it was about [edited number]mgs to kill a [edited number] pound person im only [edited smaller number] and i all ready have [edited smaller number]mgs and im dying to take them but something is holding me back my depression has become so bad that its not a second minute hour of the day where i dont think about suicide

Last edited by Gaia; November 20th 2010 at 01:41 PM. Reason: Please do not post weight numbers or medication amounts on TeenHelp [:
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Re: why im i so willing to kill my self rather than to change - November 19th 2010, 11:52 PM

You should probably be going to the person who recommended you that medication and telling them you need more therapy/psychological care.

Seems you're in a very rough spot right now, but change IS possible, it just takes some work.

Let's be honest. You're probably thinking suicide is the easy way out, but really, its no good. Not good at all. Recovery is possible, though you definitely need to commit more to it.

I suggest you work on getting more help, and put the pills away.

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Overall, Dare to be yourself.

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Re: why im i so willing to kill my self rather than to change - November 20th 2010, 12:48 AM

Sometimes that urge to really hurt yourself seems so damn appealing. I get that way too on occasion. It is tough as hell but you have to realize suicide is never the best solution. You have to remove yourself from the situation, especially the bad feelings. Calming down is hard but I have found falling asleep to be helpful. Keeping a journal is awesome too.

You said you would rather commit suicide than change. Suicide seems much easier than change--it is. But when you compare the payouts, there is no comparison. Suicide leaves you with nothing. Life gets tough but always keep your eyes on the road you want to travel. Baby steps are often all you need to get started. Little victories are still victories.
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