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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:18 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I cant hold on much anymore I'm Loosing hope I'm feeling like. Crying an cutting all over my body and not eating urges strong help please

Last edited by .:Bibliophile:.; December 29th 2010 at 01:12 AM. Reason: Adding a triggering prefix to better fit guideline
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:19 PM

What is the matter? If you need someone to talk to, you can PM me if you want.


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:32 PM

I'm not dealing well with triggers an Ed an sh an OCD :depression
ESP.. intense triggers ESP fighting with my family alot and worried about my future I feel like cutting all over now
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:35 PM

Is there something you can do to get all your stress out other than cutting? Cutting is amung one of the worst things you can do to yourself. Its an addiction and if it hasn't yet gotten to be that way, it will be. You can do other things like scream as loud as you can, throw a pillow at the wall, beat up a pillow, I don't know. Anything but cut or do other harm to yourself.


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:38 PM

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Is there something you can do to get all your stress out other than cutting? Cutting is amung one of the worst things you can do to yourself. Its an addiction and if it hasn't yet gotten to be that way, it will be. You can do other things like scream as loud as you can, throw a pillow at the wall, beat up a pillow, I don't know. Anything but cut or do other harm to yourself.
Cutting or purging or over excercise are my otioptions now and my therapist said that i had to promise to stay age though told her that I'll be safe
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:42 PM

They don't have to be your only options. They never did.


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 28th 2010, 11:44 PM

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They don't have to be your only options. They never did.
Please let me do one of those options
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 29th 2010, 12:01 AM

Nobody here is going to let you do any of those harmful things. It's not up to us to give you permission to do anything. We can tell you it's not good to do something, but at the end of the day, you're the one who has the make the choice. You can either be healthy, or not. If you decide you want to deal with this the healthy way, then keep yourself distracted and go do something you enjoy. Read a book? Watch a movie? Write a happy story? If you decide not to do this the healthy way, we can't really help.
   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 29th 2010, 12:04 AM

My triggers are intense and I'm stressed out Max and sore all over but I need immediate relief from neg emotions fastest way is to overexcercise
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 29th 2010, 12:14 AM

But none of those things help at all. They make everything worse. How are we supposed to help you if you don't want anything to change?


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 29th 2010, 12:16 AM

Don't hurt yourself, hun. You can get through this, I promise. Let me know if you want to talk, I'm here for you


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 29th 2010, 12:40 AM

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But none of those things help at all. They make everything worse. How are we supposed to help you if you don't want anything to change?
Ok I'll try to clean after I stop feelin dzzy
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 30th 2010, 11:31 PM

How have you been over the last few days? Any better?


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 09:59 PM

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How have you been over the last few days? Any better?
Still feeling depressed and down cutting urge and purging urge very intense
I've almost cut me but I stayed away from sharp objects and I cleaned while listening to good music
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 10:27 PM

Well it is good that you have not cut. That is a step up and you should be proud of yourself.


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 10:38 PM

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Well it is good that you have not cut. That is a step up and you should be proud of yourself.
Maybe I'm not sure
I can't Beileve I ate two pieces of pizza now I'm going to take two diet pills soon
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 10:40 PM

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Maybe I'm not sure
I can't Beileve I ate two pieces of pizza now I'm going to take two diet pills soon

Diet pills really don't work and it's not going to help your problem. It's good you didn't hurt yourself and it's GOOD that you ate. Two pieces of pizza won't hurt you.


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 10:44 PM

It's pathetic I'm still hungry


I'm about to take those two diet pills
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Diet pills really don't work and it's not going to help your problem. It's good you didn't hurt yourself and it's GOOD that you ate. Two pieces of pizza won't hurt you.
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 10:58 PM

You're not pathetic. If you're still hungry, eat. That's your body's way of telling you it needs food...

And I would advise you not to take them, but I can't stop you, really. You can do whatever but it won't help. Just keep that in mind.


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 10:59 PM

2 pieces is nothing. My sister eats 5 or 6 and she is as thin as a rail lol.


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:01 PM

I'll excercise an take two diet pills a day
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:02 PM

Well I'll excercise cals now to punish body for wanting food

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You're not pathetic. If you're still hungry, eat. That's your body's way of telling you it needs food...

And I would advise you not to take them, but I can't stop you, really. You can do whatever but it won't help. Just keep that in mind.
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:05 PM

Why punish your body for wanting something it needs?

Honestly, if you keep doing this you're going to end up dead. I don't mean to sound so harsh but that's reality.


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:10 PM

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Why punish your body for wanting something it needs?

Honestly, if you keep doing this you're going to end up dead. I don't mean to sound so harsh but that's reality.
my body is pathetic weak stupid useless
Weak

Body wants me fat so no I'll punish body
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:14 PM

I. Hate my body with a passion
Wish I was much thinner
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:14 PM

What was the point in making this thread if you don't seem to try and consider other people's advice? You want help and you know it, but giving up is just making you weaker. You'd have to agree having this battle between your thoughts and your body is not going over well. I think we can safely say you're not very happy. Don't you want to be healthy and get out of this cycle? Being healthy doesn't mean "fat", just so you know.


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:18 PM

Yea well I'm up to my wits with recovery and everything but ED so intense arghh I hate how I look and can never be good enough recovery seems so meek and far off and terrifying ESP weight restoration yuck
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What was the point in making this thread if you don't seem to try and consider other people's advice? You want help and you know it, but giving up is just making you weaker. You'd have to agree having this battle between your thoughts and your body is not going over well. I think we can safely say you're not very happy. Don't you want to be healthy and get out of this cycle? Being healthy doesn't mean "fat", just so you know.
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:34 PM

I understand, I truly do. And I know how scary it can be. You're correct in saying it's far off, but not in the sense you used it in. Once you start receiving help from others and are in recovery, it seems like it'll take a long time until you're fully better. And that's mostly correct, because it won't happen overnight. BUT. It's not impossible at all. You're strong enough- I know you are- and you can get through this. Once you push yourself through this tough time you'll be so much more happy. And as always, it wouldn't be called recovery if there weren't challenges attached to it. It's not supposed to be easy, but if you think about it like... If you give up you'll have to go through it all over again. If you keep yourself positive, mostly, and you think you can do it, you will. Obviously relapse is probably going to happen, but that isn't really a bad thing always. I think if you realize you made a mistake and can quickly pick yourself up again you'll be okay. But I don't think you're to that point yet. I think I've read that you have a counselor or therapist? I think it would help if you tell her these things you're telling us (and I know I'm not the first to tell you that). Maybe seek additional support from support groups (I'm not sure if you're in one or not) in your area?


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:47 PM

Fuck recovery it's to much to take to do weight restoration makes me panic to the point where I almost pass out

I hate weight. Hate it I fear weight restoration extremely I do have a therapist an in outpatient treatment

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I understand, I truly do. And I know how scary it can be. You're correct in saying it's far off, but not in the sense you used it in. Once you start receiving help from others and are in recovery, it seems like it'll take a long time until you're fully better. And that's mostly correct, because it won't happen overnight. BUT. It's not impossible at all. You're strong enough- I know you are- and you can get through this. Once you push yourself through this tough time you'll be so much more happy. And as always, it wouldn't be called recovery if there weren't challenges attached to it. It's not supposed to be easy, but if you think about it like... If you give up you'll have to go through it all over again. If you keep yourself positive, mostly, and you think you can do it, you will. Obviously relapse is probably going to happen, but that isn't really a bad thing always. I think if you realize you made a mistake and can quickly pick yourself up again you'll be okay. But I don't think you're to that point yet. I think I've read that you have a counselor or therapist? I think it would help if you tell her these things you're telling us (and I know I'm not the first to tell you that). Maybe seek additional support from support groups (I'm not sure if you're in one or not) in your area?
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:52 PM

You're overwhelmed with what you have to do. So maybe ask if you could slow down the process a little bit?


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - December 31st 2010, 11:58 PM

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You're overwhelmed with what you have to do. So maybe ask if you could slow down the process a little bit?
it's terrible even if I did it would be overwhelming I really want to cut now so badly cut of my fat

I can't recover
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:10 AM

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I can't recover
You've recovered before, you CAN and WILL recover again.

You need to remember, the perception of being fat is just a false illusion. You do not want to be thinner, you are TOO thin as it is. You need nutrition and to gain a healthy weight to live a happier life.
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:13 AM

Look, we can tell you that there is nothing wrong with you, that you will make it through, that you are not fat, and things like that. We can say that we care and I know a lot of us do. But these things, they are just words on a computer screen. They mean nothing until you believe us. Until you decide to think that way. We can't make you, we can't change you. We can try to help but we can't really help unless you let us. You are not letting us. I myself don't really know what to say to you anymore. I don't know if there is anything more that we can do.


   
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:26 AM

Thanks for giving up on me
And you guys I appreciate everything it's just I m so down an weak and think heaven might be more peaceful

I just cope with ED an sh I have alot of things going on and I feel like stowing and hopeless an powerless I wish I was ethier recovered and happy or in heaven
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Look, we can tell you that there is nothing wrong with you, that you will make it through, that you are not fat, and things like that. We can say that we care and I know a lot of us do. But these things, they are just words on a computer screen. They mean nothing until you believe us. Until you decide to think that way. We can't make you, we can't change you. We can try to help but we can't really help unless you let us. You are not letting us. I myself don't really know what to say to you anymore. I don't know if there is anything more that we can do.
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:33 AM

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You've recovered before, you CAN and WILL recover again.

You need to remember, the perception of being fat is just a false illusion. You do not want to be thinner, you are TOO thin as it is. You need nutrition and to gain a healthy weight to live a happier life.
I'm not happy am I no I'm not and no hope for myself I can't be postitive
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:39 AM

We're not giving up on you, we just don't how else to help you if you don't take our advice.


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:42 AM

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We're not giving up on you, we just don't how else to help you if you don't take our advice.
Holidays are always the worst for me now I'm overtired and sad an non stop freezing and dzzy what helps? I might need to calm down and lay off food for a half a day or so and do yoga also be easy on myself
I'm sorry I'm a bother in this world
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:45 AM

Laying off food is not going to help. And you know that very well. Eating is going help.

And I never said you were a bother.


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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 12:53 AM

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Originally Posted by Open Your Eyes View Post
Laying off food is not going to help. And you know that very well. Eating is going help.

And I never said you were a bother.
Eating makes me sick and I sometimes burp up acid
Food does not help I'll have tea and low fat products and get to gym maybe to workout
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Re: I'm so down an feelin a tad bid suicidal and about to give up - January 1st 2011, 01:56 AM

You don't seem to listen, so I'm going to leave this alone.

If you need anything PM me.


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