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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Unhappy Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 07:29 AM

So I have started self harming about 2 months ago, and its gottsn to the point where I'm doing it atleast once per day, ill just sit down and start cutting my upper arm. The blood doesn't bother me, and I don'tend to feel pain. I don't cut anywhere near my wrist so that isn't a concern. My concern is well I've been cutting the past 2 days a lot and have 30 cuts on my arm and 15 cuts on my legs.


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Re: Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 08:12 AM

Hey, Jacob:

What's been causing your increased cutting? Has there been extra stress or extra triggers? Or have your coping mechanisms not been working out as well lately?

Take a deep breath. You can get through this.

Have you been taking proper care of your cuts; cleaning and bandaging them?
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 05:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhoenixAshton View Post
Hey, Jacob:

What's been causing your increased cutting? Has there been extra stress or extra triggers? Or have your coping mechanisms not been working out as well lately?

Take a deep breath. You can get through this.

Have you been taking proper care of your cuts; cleaning and bandaging them?
Well, on the first was two months to the day that my ex left me, and thus I have cut a lot lately.as for coping methods, I use to smoke but I haven't had a pack for 3 months almost 4, so that's taking a toll on me a lot.


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Re: Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 06:36 PM

It sounds like the cutting is getting to an addictive point. You should try alternatives. Like snapping a rubber band, where you cut. It'll hurt and might take the urge away. Or you can write or journal about how you're feeling. You can dance? You can talk to me if you'd like. I understand.
Another thing is, you could go one by one, kind of. Instead of 5 cuts, do 3, then 2, then 1, then none. You get it? It's hard to just stop all together. Little by little, hun. You'll be okay. <3 stay strong.
   
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Re: Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 08:12 PM

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Originally Posted by HopefulOlivia View Post
It sounds like the cutting is getting to an addictive point. You should try alternatives. Like snapping a rubber band, where you cut. It'll hurt and might take the urge away. Or you can write or journal about how you're feeling. You can dance? You can talk to me if you'd like. I understand.
Another thing is, you could go one by one, kind of. Instead of 5 cuts, do 3, then 2, then 1, then none. You get it? It's hard to just stop all together. Little by little, hun. You'll be okay. <3 stay strong.
I've tried the rubber band and it didn't help, also since the cuts are on my upper arm I hide them easily from people so not many people know. As for writing a journal, well I tried writing stories but they got dark and scared people so I gaveup on that. And lastly your idea of doing 3, then 2 ect... well that's a great idea! But once I pick up my knife and start I find it hard to stop, hence the now 40+ cuts


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Re: Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 09:06 PM

Jacob,
You should try looking at the alternatives to self harm page on this forum. There are a lot of different ideas on it to try to keep yourself occupied and distracted when u want to cut. And I agree with Olivia- try to cut less(I know it's hard but you can do it!) and try keeping a journal. Journals are very helpful. They serve as a wonderful way to sort out your thoughts and feelings (and its a much better way to cope).
Another thing you can do is find someone to talk to. You could explain to a close friend how you are feeling or you can find a therapist to talk to. And if you do decide to get professional help, you can most likely find some treatment for depression too.
Stopping SH is very possible. Keep on trying to stop and try some alternatives. You can do it!
<3 Nal


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Re: Self harmer here - August 4th 2013, 09:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nal View Post
Jacob,
You should try looking at the alternatives to self harm page on this forum. There are a lot of different ideas on it to try to keep yourself occupied and distracted when u want to cut. And I agree with Olivia- try to cut less(I know it's hard but you can do it!) and try keeping a journal. Journals are very helpful. They serve as a wonderful way to sort out your thoughts and feelings (and its a much better way to cope).
Another thing you can do is find someone to talk to. You could explain to a close friend how you are feeling or you can find a therapist to talk to. And if you do decide to get professional help, you can most likely find some treatment for depression too.
Stopping SH is very possible. Keep on trying to stop and try some alternatives. You can do it!
<3 Nal
I have a few close friends I tell, but I tend to distance myself from getting too close and really opening up to people because when I do theyend up leaving me. As for keeping myself distracted, well I watch my little pony fim, and it helps me not to self harm. haha


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Re: Self harmer here - August 5th 2013, 12:45 AM

Hey there!

Sorry to hear about this. Sounds like things are pretty tough for you right now.

Everyone else has offered some pretty good advice, so I won't repeat after them. I did wanna offer a little tip though. Since I tend to relapse after like, two months SH free, I'm trying something new, if you'd like to check it out, then take a look at this group.

I think it'd be great if you set goals for yourself. Don't look past that goal, till you reach it. Then set another goal. Say to yourself... "okay, I'll go SH free till August 10th", after that, August 16th. Doesn't matter how small amount of days, just reaching a goal you set for yourself should really improve your hopes on recovery. Take it one day at a time and don't give up on yourself.
   
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Re: Self harmer here - August 5th 2013, 01:54 AM

Hey there,

Self harm does become addictive and so the more you do it the more you are going to need to do it to get the same relief you once got from it. I think the best thing you can do is work on trying to overcome the self harm. I know this can be a hard thing to do but in the end self harm doesn't do any good for you.

I think you should work on trying to figure out what your alternatives are so that you can work on trying to come up with some ways to resolve those issues. I have found that turning to writing can be really helpful in finding the things that are triggering you. When you start feeling the urge to harm yourself get out a piece of paper and start writing. The more you turn to writing the more you might start opening yourself up to what your triggers are.

Is there anyone you could talk to about what is going on such as family members, friends or other trusted people in your life? I know this might be hard to do but if you can work on opening up about the things that are bothering you you won't be keeping them all pent up inside. Pent up emotions are never a good thing because those feelings just build and build waiting for a release which usually leads people to want to turn to self harm.

It might be a good idea if you considered talking to a counselor as well. I know this might be a hard thing to do but a counselor would give you a safe place to go and talk about things, help you find your triggers and help you work on finding healthy coping skills.

Something else that might help is if you were to look into the Alternatives to Self Harm. The alternatives are a great way to go about distracting yourself when you have an urge. You can go through the list and try all the things that are listed and if you give yourself time your body can adjust and the alternatives can become your new coping tools.

I really hope that this helped. I am wishing you the best of luck.


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Re: Self harmer here - August 7th 2013, 06:36 AM

Sadly I don't trust my family enough to talk to them about this, I mean I told my mother once and she just shrugged it off -.- as for a counseller...tryed it, and it didn't help (granted it was for a totaly different reason but still). I have maybe 4-8 friends that know and are trying to help me, and only 2 really help me, the rest just ignore me until I tell them I'm cutting.
As for the alternatives, ill check them out, but lately all I've wanted to do was cut...so I have, and I now have 100 (ish) cuts on my upper arm


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