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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
juanx Offline
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Name: juan pierre
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Smile just want to be good enough for once in my life - November 4th 2013, 11:33 AM

Hey people,how u all doing,my names juan pierre and I'm a self harmer,I tried to quit but I just keep on craving more cuts,last night I almost fainted,I went a little too deep,today at work with long sleeves,its pretty hot but I don't want to show my fresh cuts,so I keep hiding them,its been two months now that I don't want to eat cause I'm just not hungry anymore,I want to wear t-shirts but I'm so afraid what people will think of me when they see my cuts,I don't know what to do anymore,does anyone have suggestions on how to overcome my fear,thank you for your time

Last edited by Hypothesis.; November 4th 2013 at 11:38 AM. Reason: Removing grieving prefix.
   
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Re: just want to be good enough for once in my life - November 4th 2013, 11:45 AM

Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear about everything that you are going through right now!

As far as what people will think of you, think of it this way. The people that think badly of you, maybe they're not people you want in your life anyway, if they're not willing to support you through this. The people who are actually concerned about it are the ones you want to keep, because they would be the ones who want to support you. You don't deserve to keep hiding this if you don't want to, and you DO deserve to wear whatever you want.

I think it would really help you to speak to someone about what you are feeling right now. You don't deserve to go through this alone, and speaking to someone can really help. Talk to a friend or family member, doctor, a coworker you trust, therapist, or religious leader, for instance. Your voice deserves to be heard and there will be someone willing to help. They can help you cope in different ways, help solve your problems, or even just be someone else you can vent to. It's really worth it.

Do you know what it is that is making you want to self harm? If you are unsure, maybe you can keep a journal where you document what's going on. Take special notes of the urges to self harm. Write down the date and time, what was happening, where you were, and how you felt. You can even write how you dealt, such as by self harm or not. Then when you are calmer you can look back and notice patterns or events that may be causing it that you can work on solving.

Try and find things to do in the place of self harming as well. It's excellent that you want to quit, and alternatives may help with that! This is a link to a list of alternatives. If one doesn't work, don't get discouraged, but instead try another, because one is bound to work. I find ones with self expression like writing, art, or music to help me the most, but find one that works best for you. These are healthier, safer ways to cope because you won't have to worry about going to deep or hiding anything. Remind yourself of the reasons why you don't want to self harm anymore, like the hiding it.

I am also going to give you a link to first aid information, since you mentioned you have gone too deep. It can help you take care of it and know what to look out for. Here is that link.

As far as not wanting to eat, I know you may not want to, but you need the nutrients from food in order to have the energy you need to carry out the daily activities. Try and eat at least small meals so you can get the energy you require, and work your way back up to eating a full meal.

Write down anything that you like about yourself or things you have accomplished. These are things to remind yourself you ARE amazing and ARE worth recovery.

I think that the first step towards quitting self harm is wanting to stop, and since you want to quit, I think you are on the right track. You can do this!

-Dez


   
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Re: just want to be good enough for once in my life - November 4th 2013, 08:24 PM

Hey dez,thank you so much for listening,I draw pictures of how I feel and it sometimes takes my mind to another place,away from thinking about cutting again but last night it all came back again,family problems,lonelyness,self hate,no love,I felt so depressed and irritated all over again,I want to turn to a new page in my life but I find it hard to do that,sometimes I'm afraid of what I can do to myself,I haven't been in a relationship for 5 years now and still going,I find it difficult to speak to girls,its just I'm too shy.last week saturday we had a housewarming party cause me and my best friend and his girl moved in together,but on the day of the party I felt so left out,abandonned,all his friends were there although I don't have friends,they left me when I dropped out of school in 2009,the only thing I want and really need in life is someone that understands me and someone to love me for who I am and not for what they want me to be,I know I'm not perfect.....thank you for your time and the advice,I will try to make it work,much appreciation thanx
   
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Unhappy sorry for not being strong enough - November 5th 2013, 11:08 AM

Just want to give up,everyday I think why am I still here,everybody I look at that's around me are just so happy,I feel like an outcast,abandonned and left alone to cry,what can I do so that people can notice me and just talk to me so that I can know and feel that somebody cares about me and have a interest in me,I just want to feel special again and not feel like an empty soul,anyone that can help?
   
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Re: just want to be good enough for once in my life - November 5th 2013, 03:26 PM

Juan,

If you want people to help, you need to take the first step and tell them yourself, not wait for someone to notice for you. For people that have never experienced self harm, this can be a difficult thing to say, because they don't know how it will affect you and whether you wanted people to find out.

I strongly suggest that you see someone about your current situation, even if it's only once to try it out, I seriously think you would benefit from this based on posts from you that I have came across on the forum, I know it's hard but it's something you should try out if you want to feel like someone cares.

I hope this helped you, stay strong.

~Jack.
   
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Re: just want to be good enough for once in my life - November 7th 2013, 04:07 AM

Wear your t shirt, and wear it with pride, your cuts, they tell a story they tell people where touve been and how tou got out, they are your scars, your reminder, yet your history, wear it with pride , scars may seem ugly but people with true hearts will understand


-Colorful_Outlooks

Fall down 99 times, get up the hundredth.
   
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