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I'm Sorry I'm Such A Failure. - November 25th 2013, 05:12 PM

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I can't do anything right. I'm sorry I'm not the perfect daughter. I'm sorry I cut myself. Its not like you even care. I'm sorry I'm such a failure. I'm sorry I'm alive.

I want to cut so bad right now and kill myself. I can't take it anymore. I just need to cut. Its not like anyone cares about what happens to me. I'm done. I have my blade. Goodbye.
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Re: I'm Sorry I'm Such A Failure. - November 25th 2013, 06:58 PM

Hi there,

I'm really sorry that you're struggling right now.

First of all, why do you say that your mother doesn't care? Are you sure that she doesn't care, or do you just think that? Have you ever tried talking to her about everything and letting her know what's going on, because she may not even be realizing it. Once you tell her, though, it may spark her into action.

Whether you have told her or not, though, you really don't deserve to go through this alone. You can talk to a different family member, a friend, a teacher, guidance counselor, school nurse, coach or club adviser, religious leader, or even a doctor. Your voice deserves to be heard and there always will be someone out there who DOES care and will be willing to listen and help give you the support you deserve and maybe even solve some of the problems.

I bet you do make an impact on more people than you imagine, and if they knew that you were hurting this bad, I bet they'd care. I bet it would have such a huge effect on them if you were gone as well, so please reach out for support. There is always SOMETHING to live for, even something small. For example, you may have something you want to do in life or a place you want to go, or maybe a goal you'd like to complete. Need even more reasons to live? Click here. Sometimes you have to live for the small things and let those build up, because your big thing is coming.

Do you know what it is that is triggering you to feel this way? One thing you may want to do if you aren't sure is keep a journal. In it, you can write anything, good or bad, which also makes it a good place to vent out what you are feeling. Take special note of the times when you get these emotions, such as the urge to self harm or have suicidal thoughts, by writing down the date and time, where you were, what was happening, and how you felt. Later you can even write how you dealt with the situation. Then when you're calmer you can find patterns or events that may be causing you to feel this way that you can get help on, or at least try and solve.

Cutting does not help you deal with any of these emotions though. Instead, it does the opposite, hurts you and make things worse. Not only do you have to worry about infections or hiding the cuts from those you don't want to know, you aren't actually solving any of the problems which means they will come back or get worse. Instead, why not find a healthy, safer way to cope? This is a link to alternatives to self harm. One of these may be helpful because they give you sensations or even ways to express yourself.

Know that what you are going through isn't permanent, and won't last forever. This will get better, you just have to keep fighting.


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