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Oh, Bother Offline
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Scratched the hell out of my face - January 29th 2017, 08:36 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Last night I was so anxious I started reopening scars that were bubbled up and then I had an it6ch on my face and I couldn't stop scratching it now I have a long scab like thing on my face(that looks like a burn). I feel like shit because it makes me look uglier than I already am. It has neosporin on it and it's covered but my grandma says I'm not going to cover it tomorrow for school. I'm going to look even uglier. How am I going to stop myself from picking it? I am a compulsive picker and do it without noticing.



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Re: Scratched the hell out of my face - January 29th 2017, 10:10 PM

Hi, Frankie.

May I ask why your grandmother says you're not going to cover it for school? Honestly, I think that'd be your best option. Depending on the size of the wound you could put one of those thin, clear-ish band-aids that don't stand out entirely. Not only would it hold antibiotic ointment there and keep it from getting wiped off, but it'd prevent you from being able to pick at it through the day.

I'm not sure where it is on your face, but depending, are you able to cover it, such as with a headband or some other type of headwear?

One last thing; you're not ugly, Frankie. You're beautiful inside and out. You're welcome to PM me if you need anything. Take care and hang in there.
   
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Re: Scratched the hell out of my face - January 30th 2017, 12:00 AM

I told my grandma that I would probably cover it, and she said that was fine. She said I could just tell people I burned myself with a curling/flat iron. But the problem is it's on the side where it is shaved. So I don't know how well that is going to work.

I cannot hide it with anything because it is like two or three inches away from my left ear. It is big too so I can't use a band-aid I have to use a pad and tape. So it looks weird on my face.

I just really don't want to get made fun off because I have this thing on my face covered up or not covered. I know people think I'm not ugly but I truly believe it and see the ugliness in the mirror all the damn time.

I am so fucking frustrated with myself too because it seems like every time I start school something happens. But I will not let this effect me I will go this full semester with school and will get b's or a's .

I have my art and that is helping a lot, but the problem is I have ideas of what I want to draw in my head and then when I go to draw them I can't put it on paper. It really pisses me off and then I want to hurt myself for being stupid because I don't know how to get what I see or think on to paper.

I'm sorry this is so long. I'm sorry I am me.



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Re: Scratched the hell out of my face - January 31st 2017, 08:20 PM

I hope you found a way to cover it. Bear in mind that if anyone asks what happened you're not obligated to tell them anything. I don't think anyone will make fun of you but if they do that is because they have some kind of inner problem with themselves; it says more about them than it does about you.

I don't draw but I can kind of relate in that I sometimes have difficulty in getting the right words on paper when I'm writing something. Maybe you could start slowly. For instance, you could think of how you're feeling and use a color to represent it. Or you could listen to some music, try to release some feelings, and draw based on that. Remember there's no wrong way when it comes to art.

I hope you are doing okay.


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Re: Scratched the hell out of my face - February 1st 2017, 06:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by I Believe In Me View Post
I told my grandma that I would probably cover it, and she said that was fine. She said I could just tell people I burned myself with a curling/flat iron. But the problem is it's on the side where it is shaved. So I don't know how well that is going to work.

I cannot hide it with anything because it is like two or three inches away from my left ear. It is big too so I can't use a band-aid I have to use a pad and tape. So it looks weird on my face.

I just really don't want to get made fun off because I have this thing on my face covered up or not covered. I know people think I'm not ugly but I truly believe it and see the ugliness in the mirror all the damn time.

I am so fucking frustrated with myself too because it seems like every time I start school something happens. But I will not let this effect me I will go this full semester with school and will get b's or a's .

I have my art and that is helping a lot, but the problem is I have ideas of what I want to draw in my head and then when I go to draw them I can't put it on paper. It really pisses me off and then I want to hurt myself for being stupid because I don't know how to get what I see or think on to paper.

I'm sorry this is so long. I'm sorry I am me.
I understand. It can be difficult and embarrassing to have a sore on your face. Something that may help is remembering that both girls and guys have acne breakouts and struggle similarly as far as insecurities go when facing a day of school and/or public outings. The sore on your face doesn't make you less beautiful. It'll heal.

Your determination is admirable. I'm happy to see you so committed to school. Keep in mind you don't have to do absolutely perfectly. It's okay to not be okay, and struggle in school. What matters is that you continue trying and take it step by step to do your best, while continuing to take care of yourself.

That's great that you have your art. I understand the frustration you mentioned about having ideas in your head and not being able to put it on paper. What helps me is watching guide videos about drawing on YouTube. And it also helps to simply doodle and try out different methods of drawing what you have in mind. Try to remember you're practicing and experimenting; you don't have to automatically draw it perfectly down to every detail. Have fun with it. As Cassado said, there's no wrong way with art.

If you still get frustrated, would it help to color? Coloring books are very relaxing as it relieves stress and I'm wondering if that's something you've already tried or are interested in giving a try when you're having urges/feeling angry?

Please don't apologize for being you. You're a sweet person and you don't have to apologize for a long response or being you. You are great, okay? And you're welcome to write as much as you need to because I honestly don't mind reading and trying to respond the best I can. I hope you're doing okay now.
   
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Re: Scratched the hell out of my face - February 1st 2017, 05:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nala View Post


I understand. It can be difficult and embarrassing to have a sore on your face. Something that may help is remembering that both girls and guys have acne breakouts and struggle similarly as far as insecurities go when facing a day of school and/or public outings. The sore on your face doesn't make you less beautiful. It'll heal.

Your determination is admirable. I'm happy to see you so committed to school. Keep in mind you don't have to do absolutely perfectly. It's okay to not be okay, and struggle in school. What matters is that you continue trying and take it step by step to do your best, while continuing to take care of yourself.

That's great that you have your art. I understand the frustration you mentioned about having ideas in your head and not being able to put it on paper. What helps me is watching guide videos about drawing on YouTube. And it also helps to simply doodle and try out different methods of drawing what you have in mind. Try to remember you're practicing and experimenting; you don't have to automatically draw it perfectly down to every detail. Have fun with it. As Cassado said, there's no wrong way with art.

If you still get frustrated, would it help to color? Coloring books are very relaxing as it relieves stress and I'm wondering if that's something you've already tried or are interested in giving a try when you're having urges/feeling angry?

Please don't apologize for being you. You're a sweet person and you don't have to apologize for a long response or being you. You are great, okay? And you're welcome to write as much as you need to because I honestly don't mind reading and trying to respond the best I can. I hope you're doing okay now.
Thank you so much. Nobody commented on the gauze I had on my face Monday. Then yesterday and today I have it un covered and nobody has said a word. And it honestly make me feel a whole lot better knowing nobody is going to say anything. Usually in high school people would notice and make fun of me that is why I was so terrified.

The only problem I have now is since it is on my face I can feel it every time my face moves, or like now I can feel it like making a scab(if that makes sense) and since I can feel that I want to pick it so damn bad. But then I don't want to because then it will leave an even worse scar then it already will. I just don't know how to distract myself while I am in class or just sitting. I will find that my hand will automatically go to it and press it or rub it so I can feel pain when i am in class. I just don't know.



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Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow.
Just walk beside me and be my friend"
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