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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Self-harming while not at home - March 7th 2017, 06:54 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So I know it is really bad and I shouldn;t do it. But I find myself self-harming in class, or in the bathroom, or waiting for class. Last Moday I was self-harming on myself while waiting to take a test and then during the test I was doing it too. Yesterday I had a jeans that had holes in them, well it showed the wound I got from self-harming last Monday before and during my test. Anyways I am pretty sure it is infected, well I started picking at it and rubbing it until it started bleeding. Today I was just in the bathroom and saw the wound again and I made it bleed.

I have thought about bringing a razor to college so it would be easier to self-harm. But what if people found out I was SH at school, would they bring attention to it to someone? I really do not want to have the crisis team called on me again. That happened last semester and it was horrible.

I know I need help on how to feel my emotions with out hurting myself while at school, but I just don't know how to. i mean i wear a rubber band around my wrist so I can snap it if I feel like hurting myself, but the thing is I am afraid that will bring attention to me, and everyone will know what I am thinking about. Because it is well known that if you are snapping a rubber band around your wrist you want to hurt yourself or are thinking about doing something you shouldn't. I am also afraid of the noise it would make.

I haven't really been bringing Pixie because she is Hyper and she really doesn't sit still that well. Plus I have to hold her because so won't just lay down on the ground so it's kind of a problem. This summer I am going to train her more so that she can come to school with me next fall.

I just want to know ways I can stop myself from thinking about hurting myself or actually hurting myself while I am in class or at school period. I feel like I am the only one that self-harms outside of there house. I honestly will self-harm anywhere I feel the need too.


Don't lose who you are, in the blur of the stars
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay
Sometimes it's hard, to follow your heart
Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
Just be true to who you are
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|Forum Mod: LGBT, Sexuality and gender identity, Eating Disorders, Self-Harm, Peer Pressure and Bullying, Disability|
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Re: Self-harming while not at home - March 10th 2017, 12:07 AM

Hey Essa,

It sounds like you are struggling a lot right now. Trust me, you aren't the only one who self-harms outside of your home. When I self-harmed, I would self-harm wherever I felt the need to as well; rather that was school, class, work, or when I was out with friends. A lot of people go through this, so don't think you are alone in this.

As for if someone finds out you are self-harming at school and what would happen, it really depends on the school, each school handles it differently. I go to a small private college, and the counselor isn't really that well equipped, but I didn't get kicked out or anything for it.

Do you have a counselor that you speak too? Or are there any professors that you can chat with? I know that some of them really do care about you as a person and wouldn't mind helping (again, I don't know if they would involve anybody or not because that typically depends solely on the professor and how they feel). But I have two professors at my college that I can talk to about my mental health issues, and it's really nice having them because it offers a safe space for me to go when I am on a campus. Maybe that could help you as well.

Also, I think the rubber band is a find idea. I actually use it for my anxiety, so it's not just people who self-harm who use it, so I don't think people would automatically associate that with self-harm. Plus, it's really not that loud if you just do it softly. If it's a coping mechanism for you to use I would say continue to use. What other coping mechanisms do you have?

I really hope that everything turns out okay for you, and I am so sorry that you are struggling right now. If you want to chat, feel free to send me a message. I'm always here for you. <3
   
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Re: Self-harming while not at home - March 23rd 2017, 09:38 PM

Hey, Essa.

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling so much to the point of self-harming in class and at school in general. I know you've posted this a few weeks ago so I'm wondering if the infected wound has been smoothly healing up? I hope it's healing up and if not, it is a good idea to keep it covered to prevent your clothing from rubbing against it and to help prevent you from scratching/picking at it.

On the subject of what your school would do depends on your school I believe, and definitely depends on the individual who witnesses you self-harm. It is ultimately up to them regarding what they do with that information.

If you are afraid of the noise a rubber band would make in class, it is understandable. Rather than a rubber band, would a hair tie work better? You may find those to be helpful if they're elastic enough since it doesn't make noise and since it's lined with soft material, it isn't actually harmful. Aside from the rubber band, do any other alternatives help? Does it help to have something that keeps your hands busy such as silly putty for example? As far as handling emotions, does it help to keep scrap paper to write down feelings/thoughts on?

I'm sorry you haven't been able to bring Pixie. I know she was helping you for awhile. Is she just hyper or is she loud? I'm wondering if you could bring one of those small material dog tents/shelter crates that zip up so you could be around her, and she'd be able to lay down since she knows she doesn't have free reign around the school. My dog has a small tent and she doesn't like to use it, but when I put a soft dog bed in it she wanted to lay in it voluntarily. Pixie might be more calm if the opening of the tent is facing you that way she isn't overwhelmed by all the people in the school. I hope the training helps. Do you know anyone who can help train her to make it easier?

You definitely aren't the only one who thinks about self-harming, or does self-harm outside of home. Many do it at work among other places. Even though it can be hard to leave it home, it is a good idea to refrain from carrying harmful tools that way you'd be more likely to try out an alternative since you can't self-harm. I know it is incredibly hard to push through the urge but it can help you push through more urges even when you do have tools available.

I hope you are doing okay, Essa. PM me anytime you need to talk!
   
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Re: Self-harming while not at home - March 23rd 2017, 09:54 PM

The infection went away. I self-harmed at school and told on myself and got the crisis team called. I have now withdrawn from school because I can't handle it.


Don't lose who you are, in the blur of the stars
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay
Sometimes it's hard, to follow your heart
Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
Just be true to who you are
|Member 2007||Senior Community Mentor||Social Media Guru||Resource & Newsletter Editor||Writer||Chat Mod|
|Forum Mod: LGBT, Sexuality and gender identity, Eating Disorders, Self-Harm, Peer Pressure and Bullying, Disability|
|PM/VM|


   
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