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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Noire Offline
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I'm losing control - July 2nd 2017, 08:15 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Up until last weekend I had gone about a month without self-harm. I was especially proud of myself because when I self-harmed a month prior it was a one-time incident. Usually my SH tends to spiral out of control once I get started and I was so proud that I was able to keep that from happening. But once I self-harmed last Saturday it kicked off the downward spiral. I self-harmed again on Sunday. I went almost a week without self-harming but yesterday and today I engaged in deliberate picking so it would hurt, so I guess that counts as self-harm.

How do I stop this cycle? Usually it ends up with me in a psychiatric hospital. My therapist and psychiatrist already have the idea in my head that it would be good for me to go back to residential treatment, even though I already went once this year and have no plans of going back so soon. I believe I can get ahold of this and stop destroying myself if I try hard enough. I just don't have any good ideas as to how. I have goals and things to look forward to, and my life is pretty great, but in the moment when the urges come none of that matters. I don't even know WHY they are coming. It's almost like a compulsion. To my best knowledge I don't think I'm feeling angry or sad or hurt but I end up self-harming anyway; it's really confusing.

Any ideas to help?


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm losing control - July 3rd 2017, 03:31 AM

Hey. I would suggest finding the right alternative. The cycle can be hard to break, but I know you can do it. I have no wifi and I dont want to use up all my data so I'll make this short. Find an alternative, talk to people, get your mind off things, keep your nails really short or tape them, and most of all, stay strong. I know you can beat the cycle. Sending lots of love your way! PM me if you need to talk!
❤️❤️




Life's a tough b**ch, but you are tougher. Go show it who's boss. <lots of love and hugs>
   
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Re: I'm losing control - July 4th 2017, 05:02 PM

Hi There,

First off I am really glad that you are open to finding resources to help you. Out of curiosity, why does your counselor and psychiatrist want you to go to residential treatment? Is it just the self-harm that you are dealing with at the moment or is there more? If it's just self-harm and you aren't hurting yourself deeply to the point you need medical intervention every time outpatient therapy should be fine. Which it seems like is what you personally want to do.

I would suggest when you get the urges to have a safe list of people you can call. And try to keep yourself busy with a hobby. For me I grab my music player and my dogs and take them on a walk. If it's a night I either grab a book, or text a crisis line. I know it's hard when you are having urges to actually keep yourself preoccupied but it's the best you can do until you find that one that works best for you.

Also being open with your counselor is good. They can only help is much as you let them. Tell them your feelings and that you want to get this controlled outside of a treatment center and hopefully they will listen.

All in all, I hope things start looking up for you. If you ever want to chat message me! <3
   
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Re: I'm losing control - July 4th 2017, 10:45 PM

Thank you for your responses. To add a little more detail, they want me to go to residential for a couple of reasons. One is that my self-harm always starts out small, but quickly escalates into something life-threatening. This happened in January, when I actually had to get surgery for one of my wounds. So far I've self-harmed four times in ten days and this concerns them. They are also concerned about suicidal urges and my depression in general because it's limiting my function so much. Lastly, they don't feel I can be healthy in my current environment; they feel I don't have enough structure and I need to get away from the stress in my life for a bit, even though much of it is positive stress.

I was finally honest with my treatment team and my partner about the extent of my self-harm. Pretty much all objects I can self-harm with have been made inaccessible, but my doctor worries I'll just get creative and find something else. I am trying to be better and really kick my addiction so I don't have to go inpatient. I may try calling a crisis line sometime (never done it before) but I am hesitant because I don't want them to put me in the hospital.


Love joins
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The power to conquer here in our hearts
Enduring and sacred
Eternal as time
For love, love alone will conquer all


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Re: I'm losing control - July 7th 2017, 04:20 AM

Calling a crisis line could be beneficial. There is also a textline you could try and they accept texts from most major carriers.

I think that you should set a date and if things are still bad by that date then look into treatment options. I did this a couple months ago and I ended up getting to a better place so I didn't have to go into the hospital.

The thing with self harm especially when it escalates to the point of being life threatening is that sometimes being hospitalized for the long term is the only way to stop the cycle.

If there are alternatives that have worked in the past I would suggest that you try those. Sometimes you have to just live through the urges. I remember back when I stopped self harming for the first time and was truly addicted that I would live with urges for days on end. Sometimes the urges don't go away for a very long time and the only thing you can do is distract yourself. Play with apps on your phone, play video games, use a chat room of some kind etc.

I know this really isn't that helpful. Self harm is one of those things that can be really difficult to get under control.


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Re: I'm losing control - July 9th 2017, 06:44 PM

Thanks for being open to sharing more.
I can understand their concern, but I think at this point the choice is ultimately up to you. If you feel like you can beat these urges without being putting into a treatment center, then I think only you should be able to make that choice! Maybe just keep a check on how you're doing. Typically we know we're spiraling out of control. Don't be afraid to reach out if it gets to that point.

It sounds like your treatment team is being supportive and listening to what you want, which is really good. It sounds like they can be a trusted source in getting help. I'm glad that you have opened up to them and your partner.

With all of the tools you could use gone, do you feel like it has been easier to fight the urges or not?

Also, when you get the urges I would suggest just trying to do something you love. Treat yourself. You've got this and as always I'm always here. <3
   
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