Triggering (SH): Why is all of this happening?:(

CantBreathe! · **Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 13th 2009, 02:27 AM

I got the worst news today my friend kelly her chemo failed

she has 3 months! i cant loose her i need her

. then my uncle tom ahd cancer. and so does his wife my aunt and you know whats weird she has lung cancer and shes never smoken? the my papa has dailolis

and hes skinny as a tooth pick

im crying so bad rightnow

im sitting in my room with my blade on the key board and im just starring at it and then looking down at my legs and wrist seeing what ive done

i really think im just gonna start starving myself so il die slowly and painfully theres really know point in living anymore. i give up
but why is this all happen ing i just wanna go to sleep and wake up and start over cut free ED free a new life but that stuff doesnt happen now does it.

FastForward2012 · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 13th 2009, 02:59 AM

I'm so incredibly sorry about Kelly. I can't even imagine what that must be like for both of you. I guess just try to spend as much time with her as you can. I'll pray for both of you.

My family has a history with cancer too, I know how scary the whole ordeal is. My dad had cancer his lymph nodes and they said its from smoking,and he's never smoked in his life. He got it from the microwave. But this isn't about me. Just pray for them. Is your Aunt or Uncle having any treatment for the cancer?
My granny used to be on dialysis. I know that whole concept as well. I'm really sorry, Crystal. I think the best thing to do is to be with them. and pray for them. Just know that God won't hand you anything that he knows you can't handle.

If I was with you, I would give you a biggg hug. But i'm not there, so a virtual hug will have to do. I'm sorry that you hurt yourself. Taking the pain you feel inside out on yourself will not make things any better. only worse. But I'm sure i'm not the first person to tell you that. Please don't starve yourself, Crystal. You will make it through all of this. Things will get better. I'm not going to say soon because I don't know what will happen,but things will get better eventually. You're so young. too young to go out. Please don't give up. Hang in there. I'm here any time you need someone too talk too. Any time. Even if I'm not on, you can still send me a PM or VM. I'll read it and reply ASAP. I care. You aren't alone, and just hang in there.

The fact of the matter is that you won't go to sleep and wake up cut free with a new life. So instead, we learn from these things. We get stronger. We see our imperctions,and we fix them. We change ourselves. We wake up broken,and start the process to being whole again. No-one can tell you what to do. In the end, its all up to you what you want to do. You run your life. I can tell you that cutting isn't the way to handle things. and that I hope that you won't do it again, because thats how I feel. But if you do, I'm there for you. I want to help you. I will pray for you,and your friend Kelly,and your family members.

CantBreathe! · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 13th 2009, 03:03 AM

thanks you, gina

FastForward2012 · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 13th 2009, 03:04 AM

You're welcome,Crystal. Any time.

.Brittany. · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 13th 2009, 11:44 PM

Hi Crystal,

It seems as though you are going through a lot at the moment. You should be proud of yourself for trying to seek help. It shows that coming here and posting means that there is a part of you that doesn't want to do this. All that I can recommend is spend all your spare time with them, pray for them (if you pray), and just hope that they will be okay. There is still hope! Stay strong, you have made it this far, you can keep going!

PM me anytime
Brittany

.:BreakingBeautifully:. · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 15th 2009, 01:20 AM

Hey,

I am so sorry that all this is happening to you but it will be okay. I know it doesn't seem like it right now but somehow it will work out. Please hang on.

I know how hard it can be to have to deal with sick loved ones and what not but don't you think they would want you to be happy? I know that's something someone told me once and it made a lot of sense. Your loved ones may be sick but that doesn't mean that they want you to be sick with them so try to enjoy life as best you can because I am sure that is what they would want.

Please don't cut because I don't think any of your loved ones would want that and eat because I am sure that is what they would want you to do as well.

Hang in there and if you ever want to talk feel free to pm me.

~Jenna~

InMyTimeOfDying · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 15th 2009, 04:36 AM

hey crystal,
im really sorry about your friend kelly and your families battle with cancer.
the pain your feeling is unimaginable.
i know, but please don't cut, ED.
your family wouldn't want that.
and i know, deep down you wouldn't want that for yourself.
i know your life is falling apart right now.
but im here, so is teen help.
we will help you to the best of our abilities.
don't give up. don't breakdown.
im here, were here.
pm me anytime

Beautiful_mind · **Re: Why is all of this happening?:( -** July 16th 2009, 04:32 AM

yuo can have that life with not self harm and no eatinf disoder. trust me. you have to be strong i know it seems like you cant but just try it sounds like theres alot hapening in your life right now talk to a parent or friend they can help support you through the tought times. you can get past this and have that great life. pleas pm me i wanna help yuo through this a best i can