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nixi noo Offline
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Name: Nicole
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Join Date: April 9th 2009

All I have - September 27th 2009, 03:26 PM

I started self harming about a year ago and at first I really wasn't that bad. I used to cut like once every two weeks or so and eventually I stopped for about 6 months but a month ago I started again.

I don't really know what happened but I started cutting sometimes 10 times a day. Now its really bad and I don't know how to stop. I try to go without cutting but I end up smashing up razors and cutting til I don't have the energy to cut anymore. Ive tried talking to the school counsellor but she won't listen to me...

what more can I do? I want to stop but then I don't know how to cope when things go wrong. Cutting is all I have to get me through the days anymore
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Liz94 Offline
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Re: All I have - September 27th 2009, 04:03 PM

I can strongly relate My Sh has got worse I now cut 2-5 times a day. If your school counsellor wont listen try going to your doctor. Or look up on the internet counselling services near you they will be able to help you find the reasons behind you SH
You can and will beat this I believe you can.
Just take eberything one step at a time
I know things dont seem that way right now but things can only get better.

"Casting all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." 2 Timothy 1:7

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2

PM/VM me anytime
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
forever_hannah Offline
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Re: All I have - September 27th 2009, 05:36 PM

Hey Nicole.
I'm sorry that you're going through such a hard time. First of all I want to say congrats for going six months!! That's so awesome!! If you did it once, you can do it again and go even longer next time.

Can you identify the things that trigger you and make you want to cut? If you can do that maybe you can help yourself and avoid those things and situations. Also, try the alternatives when things start to feel out of control. The link is right here. Music can help. Or writing, art, dancing, exercise, etc. One thing that I do sometimes is just get a piece of paper and rip it up into tiny pieces. It sounds dumb but I'll try to get all the bits the same size and stuff so it makes me focus on one thing that's not cutting and keeps my hands busy. Sometimes I'll even write something on the paper and rip it up to prove that I have control over it. Just like you can have control over your cutting.

If you feel like your school counselor isn't helping, is there anyone else you can talk to? Maybe a friend, parent, teacher, or somebody else? You just have to find someone that you're comfortable with. I'm seeing a therapist now who I love and helps me out so much, but before I found her I visited this other woman and we just didn't mesh. It was awful. It's like any other friendship or relationship. You'll find one that works eventually.

I hope things get better for you. PM me if you ever need to talk. Hang in there.
With hope,

Hope is real. Help is real. LOVE is the movement.
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