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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
brokensmilexx Offline
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I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 29th 2011, 09:12 PM

I didn't cut for like 2 and a half weeks. Until now.
I have an essay due tomorrow, but even if I don't finish it I can finish the rest tomorrow after school and hand it in online. So I'm not worried about that.. but I've been trying since 1 to write this damn thing. I have 3 pages done..but like 4 large paragraphs still to go. And my brain has shut off.
It happens a lot, where I just can't focus anymore and the harder I try the more frustrating it f*cking gets, obviously. I've taken breaks and what not but I can't keep going.
This set me off I guess and I cut myself. Only once. But now I want to do it again. And again. And again.
I used to cut myself at least 6 times every time I cut..and right now one just isn't enough.
This, mixed with me trying to focus is not working and I feel like shit.
I don't know what to do )'x


Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind donít matter and those who matter donít mind.


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take some chances, take the fall
take your time, no need to hurry
have some fun, and never worry ♥"
   
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 29th 2011, 09:28 PM

i feel the exact same. if i cut once, i have to cut more. like you said, one is never enough. i went a month without cutting but i struggled until i gave up and couldnt handle it, now im back to cutting. i wish someone tht i cared about would give me a hug but no one will, everyones afraid of me, so im gonna give you a hughang in there and ill try to do the same. ur story made me feel not alone, thank you for sharing.


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
brokensmilexx Offline
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 29th 2011, 09:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by summerbreeze View Post
i feel the exact same. if i cut once, i have to cut more. like you said, one is never enough. i went a month without cutting but i struggled until i gave up and couldnt handle it, now im back to cutting. i wish someone tht i cared about would give me a hug but no one will, everyones afraid of me, so im gonna give you a hughang in there and ill try to do the same. ur story made me feel not alone, thank you for sharing.
Thanks for the hug heh
I'm just hoping I don't get the urge to cut all the time again.. it was an everyday thing before.
And your welcome, thanks for the support <3


Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind donít matter and those who matter donít mind.


"Live your life and risk it all
take some chances, take the fall
take your time, no need to hurry
have some fun, and never worry ♥"
   
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 29th 2011, 10:22 PM

I know how that feels. When things get really tough for me, or I start self-harming again, it turns into an every day or every other day thing. Those times last for a while, but once I get control of it again, I can go a while without self-harming, or at least have a decent amount of time between the times I do it. I hope that you can get through this. If you need anything, feel free to PM me.
   
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brokensmilexx Offline
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 29th 2011, 11:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bnwhite View Post
I know how that feels. When things get really tough for me, or I start self-harming again, it turns into an every day or every other day thing. Those times last for a while, but once I get control of it again, I can go a while without self-harming, or at least have a decent amount of time between the times I do it. I hope that you can get through this. If you need anything, feel free to PM me.
That's what I do too.
The only reason I stopped cutting was because I was worried I was going to have too many cuts and someone would notice..I had around 43 and no one noticed once. Plus I wanted to be able to wear shorts soonish (I cut my thighs pretty bad..)
Thanks for the reply, it means a lot


Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind donít matter and those who matter donít mind.


"Live your life and risk it all
take some chances, take the fall
take your time, no need to hurry
have some fun, and never worry ♥"
   
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 30th 2011, 12:26 AM

I know how you all feel, I've gone back to cutting pretty badly every day / every other day. to all of you xx
   
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 30th 2011, 12:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by brokensmilexx View Post
That's what I do too.
The only reason I stopped cutting was because I was worried I was going to have too many cuts and someone would notice..I had around 43 and no one noticed once. Plus I wanted to be able to wear shorts soonish (I cut my thighs pretty bad..)
Thanks for the reply, it means a lot
No problem! I know how difficult it can be to try and hide. I have scars on my arms and ankles, so people tend to notice them, but usually try to stay away from the topic. But you've got a great support system here. Take advantage of it and know that we're here for you.
   
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Re: I did it again..Now I want to do it yet again. - May 31st 2011, 06:44 AM

Just focus. Say to yourself "I'll cut tomorrow." And let tomorrow never come. That's one of my biggest strategies.
I get the same thing, I cut once and I'm like "Screw it, who cares, I cut yesterday, why not more"" But you have to stay strong and get through it, which I know you can.
PM me if you ever need.


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& the sun said ďit hurts to become."
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