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Goals and Ambitions Share your goals and ambitions here, whether they are about your future career, recovery aims or anything else you're hoping to achieve.

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Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 12:24 AM

Alright, guys, so I've been having a hard time lately in terms of my depression and anxiety, and I've been engaging in a lot of self-harm/ED behaviors. Yesterday I had a really eye-opening experience, and I realized that I don't want to be doing this for the rest of my life. Moreover, I don't want to be the sickest (something I've struggled with for quite a while) or to die. I want to be happy and healthy and live my life to the fullest. Naturally, this was a huge revelation for me, and I've vowed to really start working hard in therapy and to do my best not to turn to self-destructive behaviors to ease my pain, rather than simply giving into the urges like I have been.

I'm starting college in about a week and I'm trying to look at this whole experience as an opportunity for betterment and change. Going away will give my a chance not to escape my past, but to create a brighter future for myself. I've decided that I have to accept where I am and where I have been in life, including the darker places I've ventured into, but acceptance does not mean there is no room for change. So, my goal is to really start working the program and to make college a good, clean, healthy experience for myself. I know that doesn't mean I won't slip up, but I'm going to do my best to stay on track.

Wish me luck!
   
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Re: Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 12:33 AM

GOOD LUCK! I'm doing the exact same thing. I'm moving into residence on Sunday and since I don't know anyone in the area I want to try to start anew. Here I don't need to be defined by my anxiety/depression/eating disorder. I'm tired of isolating myself. I'm going to talk to people and just be really friendly and actually go out if I'm invited to something. It's time to start living my life and leave the disordered hell behind. I know it won't happen all at once but that's my intent! If you ever need someone to talk to I'm here for you Go out there and live the healthy, awesome life you deserve!


♥ PM me anytime, I'm here for you ♥

Out of the ashes I'm burning like a fire. You can save your apologies, you're nothing but a liar. I've got shame, I've got scars that I will never show. I'm a survivor in more ways than you know. 'Cause all the pain and the truth, I wear like a battle wound. So ashamed, so confused, I was broken and bruised. Now I'm a warrior.

Last edited by RiseFromTheAshes; August 22nd 2013 at 12:34 AM. Reason: typo
   
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Re: Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 03:16 AM

Good luck Kylie! It's great that you decided to make a commitment to try your best to get better. That's where recovery begins. I hope you have a wonderful college experience and that you meet all of the goals you have for yourself. College seems scary to me, but I'm sure you'll have a wonderful time


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Re: Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 02:43 PM

Good luck, Kylie! You can do this, you can even make little sticky notes with reminders. Or write on a white-board if you bring one to school with you, and look at it every day.
   
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Re: Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 03:56 PM

Thanks so much, guys! Your support means a lot to me!
   
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Re: Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 06:35 PM

I truly think that is a great goal, and a very achievable one too. It will take alot of motivation, dedication, effort, and hope/faith - but I believe, and I KNOW, you can do it!

Keep your head up, a smile on your face, and your mind on the right track and anything is achievable.


Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
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Re: Starting Anew - August 22nd 2013, 11:25 PM

It's amazing that you're starting to use this as a new opportunity! You should be proud that you came to this realization and want to better yourself. I have all the confidence in the world that you can do this and go far!


Let it come and let it be...

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Re: Starting Anew - August 23rd 2013, 02:11 PM

Thank you so much, both of you!
   
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