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Goals and Ambitions Share your goals and ambitions here, whether they are about your future career, recovery aims or anything else you're hoping to achieve.

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BreathingIn Offline
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Changing plans and goals. - July 14th 2015, 06:41 PM

Hi all. I've posted on here several times because I'm very stressed out in my life. You all have been so helpful and uplifting in my hard times, and I thank you for that

I think A LOT, almost non stop, about my life and where it's going. I'm enrolled in graduate school for my MBA in the fall, but it's at a school that I don't want to go to. I'm unsure if I even want to go to graduate school because I don't want to put off working for another 2 years. I live at home with my parents and I cannot take it anymore.

I can't get a job. I applied for many entry level business jobs and can't get one. I applied to be a waitress and couldn't even get that. My grandparents set me up for a job stocking shelves at a grocery store, where the manager is family, and he will pay me more than minimum wage. I don't want to work there because I do not like the idea that my family had to get me a job. It makes me feel like I cannot do anything for myself. But I'm starting to give in and am thinking about taking the job just to have money because my plans and goals in life are changing.

So here's the big thing - I live just outside of a medium sized city in the US. Literally less than 5 miles from the downtown area. I grew up in the country and my parents and I moved here for me to go to college in the city four years ago.

Well, I'm sick of the city. I don't like it at all and I think it's the main reason for my stress and anxiety. I miss the quiet, simple life outside of the city. I'm not from a tiny, tiny small town, but it's not a city, you know? It's about an hour outside of the city. It's a perfect area mixed with shopping centers, business districts, and pretty rural communities. Here in the city, it's all jammed packed bullsh!t with too many people and too much noise. We just got back from vacation in a small ocean town where it was quiet constantly. It was so relaxing! Now we're home and a neighbor has been hammering something since 8am (it's now 2pm). Every single day there is noise outside, such as heavy construction, or neighbors doing stupid things like hammering something for 6 hours. It's dirty and there are a lot of weird and very mean people too. I'm just very uncomfortable here overall.

I feel like my best bet is to take that grocery store job just to save money to move back to the area where I grew up. I physically cannot handle the city anymore. I feel like it's stressing me out so bad that it's going to give me cancer or something. I'm not being sarcastic, I'm very serious.

My plan is to take the grocery store job, save up money, buy a car (the problem here is I am buying a brand new car because I don't trust used cars), and then move back to where I'm from. That way, it's cheaper to live out there where I would be able to get a small job to afford my car and an apartment. The idea of getting a new car is more of an investment because it will last me at LEAST 10 years granted I don't wreck it

I hope this is plausible No matter what, if I live in the city I will never be able to live on my own which is something I am desperate to do. A studio apartment here is no less than $800-$900 a month and it's not the best quality place. Where I grew up, I can get a 1 bedroom apartment for half that price and it's a gorgeous place. A payment for a new car would be between $350-$400 a month, maybe including insurance. I don't eat much so groceries wouldn't be expensive. I think I'd do pretty well. There is even a great university there where I could get my MBA when I want to.

Another problem is my parents will fight me endlessly to tell me my plan is wrong and stupid and that I don't know what I'm doing. My family is very emotionally abusive and shelters me. I guess it would come down to involving a family therapist to help me there.

I just want to live on my own. I think that since it's cheaper to go back to where I'm from and that I'm happier there, that is my best option. Should I take that grocery store job? I'm thinking I have to if I want even a chance at moving out.

Thanks for reading all this.. I know it's long haha
   
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Re: Changing plans and goals. - July 14th 2015, 07:11 PM

actually, this should be moved to the Goals and Ambitions forum. my bad!
   
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Re: Changing plans and goals. - July 15th 2015, 07:43 PM

Hey there,

I completely understand your frustration with the situation you're currently in. I'm actually going through something very similar and I realize that it's a really difficult thing to struggle with.

The most important thing that you need to remember is this: this is YOUR life. The choices that you make are going to affect you and have an impact on your happiness and overall well-being. If getting out of the city is something that you feel you will benefit from, there's no reason at all that you shouldn't chase that dream.

Personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with taking the job that your grandparents set up for you. I understand the fact that you would prefer a job that you were able to obtain on your own but, for the time being, this is something that will provide you with the money that you need to move out of your current city into a place that you will be happier. This job might not be what you were hoping for, but it will help you get one step closer to the things that you want out of life.

I know it's stressful, but you'll figure everything out in time. Just maintain faith in yourself and, when things get tough, remind yourself that it is all to help you have your best chance at happiness.

Take care!


wanderlust consumed her;
foreign hearts & exotic minds compelled her.
she had a gypsy soul
and a vibrant heart for the unknown.
-d. marie
   
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BreathingIn Offline
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Re: Changing plans and goals. - July 15th 2015, 11:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elixir. View Post
Hey there,

I completely understand your frustration with the situation you're currently in. I'm actually going through something very similar and I realize that it's a really difficult thing to struggle with.

The most important thing that you need to remember is this: this is YOUR life. The choices that you make are going to affect you and have an impact on your happiness and overall well-being. If getting out of the city is something that you feel you will benefit from, there's no reason at all that you shouldn't chase that dream.

Personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with taking the job that your grandparents set up for you. I understand the fact that you would prefer a job that you were able to obtain on your own but, for the time being, this is something that will provide you with the money that you need to move out of your current city into a place that you will be happier. This job might not be what you were hoping for, but it will help you get one step closer to the things that you want out of life.

I know it's stressful, but you'll figure everything out in time. Just maintain faith in yourself and, when things get tough, remind yourself that it is all to help you have your best chance at happiness.

Take care!
Thank you for your understanding <3 I called that job today and the hiring manager is calling me back next week
   
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Hiraeth Offline
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Re: Changing plans and goals. - July 18th 2015, 10:32 PM

Moved

I understand being sick of the big city and the need to distance oneself from emotionally abusive family members. Good luck with that job!


"If limitations exist, it is because we have erased the possibility of potential."

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