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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 5th 2016, 03:28 AM

When I was 15 this guy touched and rubbed between my legs anyway I told this to a pychatrist that they said he was abused to because he was the same age.

Then I've talked about my Foster sister forcing herself on me he said that was not sexual abuse either. Because we e we're the same age.

Is he wrong I was I wrong this whole time thinking I was abused


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Re: Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 5th 2016, 03:58 AM

You're not wrong. My guess is that he's thinking legally. What happened to you was not okay, even if it happened to the people who also did it to you that wouldn't make it not count. But there are age differences between victim and aggressor that determine what the abuse/behavior can legally be considered. That doesn't mean it wasn't wrong, wasn't abuse, doesn't count, didn't happen or anything like that.


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Re: Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 5th 2016, 04:13 AM

yeah, no. any form of non-consensual sexual contact is REAL abuse, no matter the age.

like the above poster said, he was probably thinking in terms of legality more than the legitimate definition of abuse. maybe he thought you wanted to report it or something, so he wanted to let you know it wouldn't necessarily be considered abuse due to the age.


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Re: Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 5th 2016, 07:42 AM

Hey Frankie!

What happened to you happened to you and it was wrong. Any type of sexual contact without your consent is abuse. As the others said, your psychiatrist was probably referring to the legal view. Because you're of the same age, maybe you can't press charges or something. But it is still abuse and you were not wrong in thinking you were abused.

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Re: Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 5th 2016, 02:47 PM

Any unwanted sexual contact is abuse. Legally speaking, the higher the age gap, the more severe the penalties are for the perpetrator (because they should've known better). But that doesn't mean to say that someone the same or a similar age can't abuse you because the basic definition of abuse is that it was unwanted and non-consensual, regardless of age or even gender.

Chances are, your psychiatrist doesn't know much about sexual abuse (many people find that psychiatrists are just there to prescribe medication). Do you have a counsellor or someone else you can talk to?


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Re: Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 5th 2016, 11:18 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by DutchWelshWolf View Post
Any unwanted sexual contact is abuse. Legally speaking, the higher the age gap, the more severe the penalties are for the perpetrator (because they should've known better). But that doesn't mean to say that someone the same or a similar age can't abuse you because the basic definition of abuse is that it was unwanted and non-consensual, regardless of age or even gender.

Chances are, your psychiatrist doesn't know much about sexual abuse (many people find that psychiatrists are just there to prescribe medication). Do you have a counsellor or someone else you can talk to?
This person was just at the hospital doing my evaluations because I was suicidal. SO I didn't really take it seriously but I was just wondering.

Yes I have a therapist I am in the process of fighting with her about treatment right now. SO I may not have a therapist at the end of the day today


Don't lose who you are, in the blur of the stars
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay
Sometimes it's hard, to follow your heart
Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
Just be true to who you are
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Re: Got told they we're just as abused as me - April 6th 2016, 09:28 AM

That makes sense then. I read your other post about your treatment and your therapist and I really hope that things get sorted for you. Even if you end up having a different therapist and treatment plan instead. I just hope that it works for you


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