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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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Haruhi Offline
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OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 12:23 AM

My 'best friend' called and asked me to meet her with 2 other lads, so I did, her being my best friend.

I got there and she was with one lad, so the other came up too me, he tried to get me to go to his house. I said 'no' because it's late and my dad didnt know where I was. He then started trying to carry me, i was fighting him off while shouting, his sister came past in the car and she stopped and he let go, so I tried running home, i am not a strong runner, so he caught up to me, and grabbed me once again, pinning me down on the grass around my wrists, the flashbacks to my rape were unbearable and my friend was just laughing. He was saying he was going to have sex with me.. i was nearly in tears, and i am in tears now.. i really need a hug.

i dont knwo what to do.. :/ i am really shook up.
   
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Re: OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 12:28 AM

Hey Jordan,
I'm really sorry that this has happened to you. Is there anyone you can talk to about this? Remember that things like this are NEVER okay. Stop means stop. Nothing else. I don't have much advice but you can always talk to me if you need some support. I'm just a PM away.

Take good care of yourself.




   
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Re: OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 12:36 AM

Well it sounds like your friend was just trying to hook you up. As for that guy, I don't think he meant any harm he was just a bone head and thought you'd be turned on if he carried you. I wouldn't loose to much sleep over this one. It was just a bad night - sleep it off. I really understand though how the flash backs could take a toll on you, that is what I feel may have triggered your feelings. I hope now that your safe at home you're starting to feel better.

Perhaps you should give your friend a call and kindly say that you were out of place and uncomfortable. This could result in her not introducing you to any new guys which could be a bad thing seeing as there are good one's out there. Its up to you - as long as your okay now I'm happy.
   
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Re: OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 01:06 AM

Thank you Angelina and Ryan for your replies Means a lot.

The thing is, i KNOW my friend wasn't trying to hook me up.. not with him, even she knows he's trouble. I know he IS a bonehead. But I am sure he must've known it was hurting me, i was nearly in tears and shouting :'/

She knows about the rape and she knows how much of a huge impact on my life it had.. i dont see why she couldnt see i wasnt okay. x
   
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Re: OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 02:07 AM

To be honest, if she knew about your past and she was laughing, then she's not exactly being a good friend at all. =/ I'd try talking to her and telling her how you feel about it, if she doesn't seem to understand then it's probably best not to talk to her. I know losing friends is difficult, but if they're only going to hurt you it isn't worth it, you really deserve to be treated far better than that. But sometimes people make silly mistakes and act inconsiderate in social situations without thinking, talk to her and hopefully she might understand where you're coming from.

Are their any other friends, family or people you trust that you can talk to atm too? Having support and people there for you would probably help a lot after what you went through, and would help distract you from flashbacks. Take care and really hope you'll be ok.


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Re: OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 02:28 AM

Although from the guys point of view he honestly may not have realized he was hurting you. See some guys are pretty rough and don't realize that they can't be that aggressive to girls. The reason I sound so defensive on his part is because I know a lot of losers like that, old friends and so on. He's probably not a quick thinker and he was head over heals for you, he could have thought that a cute wrestling match would be a good way to kick the awkwardness - it sounds really dumb but I wouldn't put it past me you never know with those boneheads.

Meanwhile your thinking "Get Off ME!"


Even your friend could have been intimidated by him, I don't know. Laughter is a sign of insecurity in some respects, so I wouldn't blast her because if she wholeheartedly felt he was assaulting you, guaranteed she would have done something. She also could have seriously liked the guy she was with and didn't want to tell off his friend in respect for him. There's more side story here then meets the eye I think.
   
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Re: OMFG..I AM SHAKING AND SCARED :/ - August 25th 2010, 02:15 PM

Thanks Ryan for your reply, I can see some aspects are actually right.. I just think he was WAAAY to forceful, and when someone puts me under force and i can't move.. i panic and have flashbacks.

Maybe I overreacted?
Well i spoke to my friend today, and she did apologise, she said she didnt realise it affected me so much. :/
I think i'll just forget about it.

Thanks everyone for your replies, means so much :')
   
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