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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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George^^ Offline
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My Friend, Her Family, And Abuse. - April 1st 2012, 11:28 PM

Okay, I have this friend, and her life isn't the easiest thing ever. Her dad left and then everything kind of fell to hell. Her mom takes drugs and drinks, and I've heard of a lot of sexual abuse, and... Well... She treats me like I'm a counciler and I need help on how to help her.

My friend has been raped by a girl, even through she's a girl it still counts as it, because it was sexual. She has talked to people about it, like a teacher and her mom (Through for the totally wrong reason of getting another pet that no one took care of, or even gave it an actual name.)

Then last year, one of her mom's ex boyfriend's broke into their house (More like just strolled through the front door, which was unlocked) and basically molested my friend and her sister. They went to the police about that, but I'm not sure what exactly happened after that.

Her uncle raped her cousin, and yet her cousin's dad has done nothing and that same uncle is still able to visit her cousin.

Her sister, I'm pretty sure it was a cousin that did this, licked her sister, in her genital area. Because her uncle leaves the porn channel on.

I don't know how to help my friend, and wish I could. But I'm not the best person because I get easily annoyed (expecially at this person, for other reasons) and I don't want to be the only person supporting her, I have my own problems too, and I just want to know the best way to help my friend get help with all this. My first answer would be to tell Social Services, but then my friend would lose her mom and then they'd have to live with us again (A different story, but her mom had a mental illness, and still does.)

So... Can anyone give me some suggestions on how to help my friend and her family?


I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a thousand fucking times
That I'm OK, that I'm fine, that it's all just in my mind
But this has got the best of me, and I can't seem to sleep
It's not 'cause you're not with me, it's cause you never leave
   
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Dr.Bobby Offline
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Re: My Friend, Her Family, And Abuse. - April 2nd 2012, 01:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by George^^ View Post
I don't want to be the only person supporting her, I have my own problems too, and I just want to know the best way to help my friend get help with all this.
Bravo. Reasonable, good judgment, good friend!

I think the first place to start, George, is to sit down calmly with her and let her know what your concerns for her are..as well as your very appropriate limitations to really help. Then work with her collaboratively on solutions, which involve telling some adults who can intervene...and not necessarily by yanking her out of her home (that's always a last resort, anyways). The first step would probably be some counseling to assess the situation and try to stabilize it.

Offer to go with her to talk with the person of her choice..it can be a teacher or a guidance counselor or your parents..someone who can support her and then make contact with the professionals who can help your friend and keep her safe.


PM me with the link of the post you'd like me to respond to.
   
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George^^ Offline
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Re: My Friend, Her Family, And Abuse. - April 2nd 2012, 01:04 PM

Thanks.
I didn't just excactly mean that she had to leave her house, but here you have to go through social services to get a counselor, and even after you get one, there is the problem of keeping them. I'll talk to her about it the next time I see her. (We don't see each other too often because we go to different schools and such.)


I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a thousand fucking times
That I'm OK, that I'm fine, that it's all just in my mind
But this has got the best of me, and I can't seem to sleep
It's not 'cause you're not with me, it's cause you never leave
   
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