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Flora Offline
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How to deal with the past? - October 22nd 2012, 06:49 PM

I didn't really know where to put this, but basically the past year or so has been horrific for me. I'm not going to detail it all out, that would take far too long. Leaving school provided me with a change to close off that 'section' of my life. I seriously thought I had wrapped everything up and forgot about it all, but it appears I may still have some sort of mental block lingering in the back of my mind because of my past.

I've been having dreams where I feel like there's a ghost shadowing me, and he feels threatening, as if he's trying to kill me. It doesn't matter where I am, what I'm doing, who I'm with in the dream... he's there. It often makes me up, and leaves me so stressed out I feel like he's there in my bedroom. I've googled it, and found that dreams where a ghost is trying to kill you may represent that you need to confront your past and repressed emotions, and let go of them. I know the internet isn't known for being the most accurate source, but at this point, I'll try anything.

I'm aware my past is preventing me subconsciously from doing things, so I think it's about time I tried to deal with it again. But this time, do it properly and leave no stone unturned.

So, my question is, how do you go about 'confronting your past and repressed emotions'? I have no idea where to start, and help would be greatly valued.. Thanks

“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.”

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Re: How to deal with the past? - October 24th 2012, 10:11 AM

" Just to get lessons and not to be worried " .
Past always have bitter realities and matters up to some extent.So the people who get the lesson from this make their present and future happy and progressive.So let me tell you that just get the lesson by considering past your master.It is also true that past has strong effects in our life.
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Re: How to deal with the past? - November 5th 2012, 06:37 AM

Everyone has both happy and sad incidents in their past life. But we don’t have to worry about past failures because they have already happened and we cannot go back and change those. The best thing is learn lessons from the past and plan your future properly.
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Re: How to deal with the past? - November 6th 2012, 03:17 AM

First, I'm sorry that the only responses you've received so far have been from spammers.

Second, I'm a bit confused on what you're asking us about. Do you know what is holding you back, or do you have a suspicion that you've repressed a memory? If it's the former, then there's nothing to hold you back from processing the memory now. You mentioned that you might see a psychological professional in another post, so talking about that memory with them could be a great starting point. If it's the latter, then it's a bit more complicated. Some traumatic memories won't resurface until you're reminded of it (ex. you witnessed a murder at a carnival, and tasting cotton candy "triggers" the memory). Other memories seemingly come back on their own, when the mind is ready to process them (and won't become completely overwhelmed). You can't really force the process, especially if you can't remember the circumstances surrounding the memory. All you can do is carry on with your life, despite the suspicion you have. I personally don't give much stock to dream interpretation - "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." I could say the same thing for ghosts. Maybe it means something, or maybe it doesn't.

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Re: How to deal with the past? - November 6th 2012, 05:46 PM

Wow, I totally forgot about this thread

Anyway, I'm not aware of having a repressed memory, but I suppose that's the whole point of one I think it's more a case of me going through a rough spot and experiencing something I'd rather forget. When that happens I usually think about it at every oppertunity I get, I'll run through what happen bit by bit in my head, for a few weeks. Once it's clear in my head that what has happened has happened I'll make sure I forget it ever happened. If somebody asks me about it I deny it ever happened.

I know there's things that happened in the past that are really holding me back now. For example, I used to be really good at History, I always got the best score on the tests, then one day I didn't do as well. Then I got depressed, or whatever it was, and I got loads worse. I never regained my confidence. Right now, I'm doing A-level history, and I feel like I haven't got a chance at it, just because I associate the subject with all the frustration and self loathing that happened around it in the past.
I've tried to let go of it, but I'm finding it impossible. I've never confronted it, just buried it, and it's dug back out. There's similar things happening in other areas of my day to day life, and I know I'm going to end up a total mess again if I don't deal with the past. Quite frankly, I'm sick of it governing my life. People say the past makes you who you are, but I really hate what it's turned me into.

And about the ghost dreams, I've noticed that what I think about before I go to sleep really twists my dreams. If I'm make myself totally distressed thinking about what I've done wrong in the past, Mr. ghost pays a visit. It might be nothing, it just seemed like a strange coincidence.

“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.”

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