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Am I normal? I think I need help. - September 11th 2014, 07:47 PM

Okay, so here's the thing. I am somewhat anti-social. I will try to explain in the best way I can.

I might have personality issues. I have a problem with most people. Nothing violent. I just don't like most people, including friends which also includes friends who are nice to me. There are VERY FEW people that I will say that I definitely like and enjoy spending time with. I am not really close to my relatives but I don't consider that a problem so let's leave that. The problem is with friends. I prefer staying home (maybe because I think I am lazy) than hanging out with friends most of the time. I am not the type of guy who has many friends. I have a very limited number of friends and I think I don't even like most of them. If we just stop talking today, I don't think I'll ever miss them. If I move away, I don't think I will be able to stay in contact with them. I won't bother to. These are my college friends that I am talking about. The only reason why I consider them friends and talk to and all is because we meet everything in college. We are classfellows (both guys and girls) so we gotta meet everyday. In this past summer vacations of 3 months, I hardly met them once even though they all live nearby. Kept in touch on Facebook (but if it was up to me I wouldn't have done that either). And I am very sure that after graduation, I won't bother to even stay in touch with any of them. Generally, they are good friends, sincere with me, they like me too - I know it. The problem is not with them, it's with me. I have that loner type of personality. I also have friends who I actually like and enjoy hanging out with but these are the people that I can count on one hand's fingers. I don't even like making new friends or talking to new people. I get so many chances. I mean when I hang out with these friends, sometimes they invite their other friends too and that is the time for me to talk with their friends and become friends with them too but I don't. I hardly talk to them. Again, I'm sure the problem is with me. This also include their female friends. Mostly, (don't judge me) I feel that I have intense dislike for their female friends. I look at them and I feel intense dislike. They haven't done anything to me but it's like that I don't like their faces. This is with females, not males I think. I am completely straight. Then there are some girls that I like, I find them hot, I want to talk to them, I want to be friends with them. I don't know why there are some girls whose faces I cannot tolerate then there are some girls who attract me. There are only a few guys that I like and want to become friends with them (nothing sexual, as I said I am completely straight). If I have to stay home all the time, I can. I obviously get bored and want to do something/go out to kill the boredom but I would HARDLY bother to call up any of my friends and make any plans with them - this also includes the friends that I actually like.

Lately, I have been feeling this a lot that these I am quite fed up (for no apparent reason) with these college friends. I would again say that I know for sure that they like me and enjoy spending time with me, but I don't. I do go out with them and all but inside me I am not enjoying. It feels like I'm doing this forcefully. And lately I have noticed that this dislike for them is increasing.

I feel something is up with my personality. What do you guys think after reading all this?

P.S. I am a completely non-violent guy. Never get any temptations to hit someone or hurt someone. Whenever I have a problem/conflict/fight with someone, I don't escalate things but just wish that they stop existing for me and I stop existing for them and we both ignore each other completely and everything goes back to normal.

P.S.S. I am sexually charged up most of the time so this personality issues thing has got nothing to do with any sexual problems that you may think I have. I am sexually active. And I think I should also mention that I don't think I suffer from any kind of depression or anything like that. I get bored a lot but nothing like depression. But I do feel frustrated a lot.
   
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Its.Just.Angie Offline
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Re: Am I normal? I think I need help. - September 11th 2014, 08:32 PM

Hi

I believe you are PERFECTLY normal in my opinion... To be honest I don't like some my friends... But I'll never hurt them in anyway.. If it gets to the point where it is causing from you to be truely happy with yourself... Then yes you do need help.. If you think you need help.. Most likely you need help. It doesn't hurt to try it either... But its YOUR choice to make.. But if do think its a problem... Then I recommend trying to get help.
   
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Re: Am I normal? I think I need help. - September 11th 2014, 08:33 PM

From what you've described, for me, it sounded like antisocial personality disorder (I did NOT judge you in any way or said that you surely have that. I am just guessing). But I am not a professional and nobody on TH could diagnose you.

I'd suggest you to make an appointment with a therapist or a psychologist to make things clear and maybe diagnose you with it and to give you the right treatment.

I hope I helped a bit.



Colin / 17 / Pre-op Trans-Guy
on T since 12/21/16





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