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Question boyfriend - September 18th 2014, 08:23 AM

So I have been a long sufferer of bi-polar, ADHD and anxiety...I have always viewed myself as hard to handle and not worth the time. 3 months ago I started going out with my current boyfriend. ..now before him crying at the drop of a hat was normal for me, but now that I have someone who does not call me a baby for crying....I just cry harder and more often. When he scolds me, when I think I did something wrong, and the like...and then my anxiety kicks in and tells me he is going to leave me because I am such a baby...I know this rambling probably made no sense to anyone here..
I Just want to k ow if this is normal...or is there something wrong with me?

P.s. I do have meds for bi-polar but do not take them as they make me shutdown completly and I feel like a vegtible

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Thumbs up Re: boyfriend - September 21st 2014, 06:25 PM

Well first thing I understand your struggle as I also suffer from those same illnesses so I hope I can be of help. You are worth the time you are just as human as any else just with a mental illness. Far as your boyfriend goes I think you are probably just used to people treating you like you can't handle yourself because of your disorders and he is different because he doesn't treat you like a baby, but if he calls you a baby and says he is gone to leave you because of your anxiety he is probably not worth the time. When you have serious illnesses you need people who will support you and help in any way possible. The last thing is that you said you have meds for bipolar but don't take them. I understand the zombie like side effects that comes with psych meds, but you probably shouldn't go off your medicine with out talking to your doctor. You might have to keep trying different medications to find the right one for you. I really hope that this helps you in some kind of way. Just remember that you are not a burden on any one.

~ "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can't change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference." ~

Last edited by ~Creative Disaster~; September 22nd 2014 at 06:23 AM.
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Re: boyfriend - September 21st 2014, 08:42 PM

I'm in recovery from depression, but I've been having issues with anxiety recently. I've also been dating my girlfriend for 3 1/2 months, so I understand the insecurity and fear that she'll leave me because I'm too much to handle. For me, part of it is that our relationship is so new that it feels a bit more delicate and that makes me afraid it'll fall apart. Maybe that's part of it for you as well?

I also understand feeling like I'm too much to handle or like I'm expressing my pain too much. The thing is, it's important to be able to talk about what's wrong with your significant other; and as long as you have fun, lighthearted interactions as well, it's fine. If it gets to the point where most of your interactions are about these heavy topics, then it could become unhealthy. If this becomes a problem, I would recommend that you see a therapist (if you're not already). That way you can do the bulk of your emotional unloading in therapy, and not have to put that all on your boyfriend. It's very important that you share what's going on with your boyfriend, and that you get some comfort from him; but you can find other emotional outlets so it doesn't become too much for any one person to handle.
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Re: boyfriend - September 22nd 2014, 04:17 AM

If you don't like your medication, I definitely want to encourage you to talk to your doctor. There are several different medications for bipolar disorder, so if the first one you tried isn't working for you, then you can switch until you find some that work and help you.
As for your question, it is normal. In fact, it's a good thing that you feel comfortable enough to cry in front of your boyfriend. If you're afraid you are wearing him down, then I encourage you to talk to him. Tell him how you're feeling and that you are worried you are upset too often. If he respects you, he will reassure you that it's okay and he is here for you.

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