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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Rhyfelwr Offline
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Question Should I go to a psychiatrist or not??? - December 30th 2014, 06:43 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Um, hi guys.

It's been a long time since I've been on here, for various reasons. But I need help right now from people who are able to understand my situation. Oh, and small warning, this could get long and also might be triggering.

Since around four years now, I've been seeing a counselor. Mainly check ups, because I was severely bullied for two years and some four years ago. Stuff happened.

I thought I had finished that chapter of my life. I thanked the one person I needed to thank for saving me, and I felt good about it, I really did.

But around a month ago, I started having breakdowns, I guess. Nothing major; crying at random times, losing control, etc. It happened once during school, and I went to the counselor immediately, because I knew that would be one place where I could cry without being judged. This was the third counselor, because the counselors before had always only stayed one year, for whatever reason. This is the second year (finally) of this counselor, so she knew me better than the counselors before.

She told me that it might be an idea to see a psychiatrist outside of school, because to her, this was escalating a bit, and she didn't have resources here that I would be given if I went to someone outside of school.

Now, here's the problem: I'm torn between agreeing and denying. Why? I'm growing up with a mom and dad who don't necessarily... accept depression and mental illnesses and, well, self-harm. When I came home two and a half years ago because I had attempted SH, the first reaction was me being kicked out. Yes, that happened. I basically lived by a friend for a week.

Eventually they just forgot about it, but whenever anything relating to depression, self-harm, or a counselor was brought up, both would get up and do their own thing. And, frankly, I'm scared of my dad. He didn't do anything, I've just grown up to fear him and his reactions.

Neither of them know I'm still going to a counselor, neither of them know anything, actually, except for the attempt two and a half years ago. So I'm seriously scared out of my mind as to how either of them will react when I bring up the subject of a psychiatrist outside of school.

I don't know what to do, and I'm really scared either ways. For me, seeing someone outside of school is a really big step - I guess it makes me feel like it's more official. Should I just stay with the counselor in school, or should I try and get my parents to take me to a psychiatrist? I also don't know what to expect, from anything.

Listen, if you've read up until here, thank you, really.

Could some of you please give me some advice on what to do? I'm pretty torn.
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Re: Should I go to a psychiatrist or not??? - December 30th 2014, 11:08 PM


I think the best thing to do is to go to your school counselor and talk to her about why you think seeing someone outside of school might not fly with your parents. Maybe if she could talk to your parents over the phone or something about why she thinks it's a good idea, they would be more understanding than if it came from you.

When you say you were seeing a counselor, do you mean your school counselor or someone outside of school? You could try going back to the same person. Your parents might be more understanding if it was someone they let you see before.

I think it is a good idea for you to see a psychiatrist -- especially if talking to school counselors has been helpful for you. It would probably be good to have someone you could talk to and get help from, and who could do more than your school counselor. They also probably wouldn't leave after a year. I think if you can get to a psychiatrist, you should.

You've gotten through stuff like this before -- you can do it again. No matter what happens, you can be okay at some point

Good luck!


The opposite of war isn't peace - it's creation
~Jonathan Larson

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Rhyfelwr Offline
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Re: Should I go to a psychiatrist or not??? - December 31st 2014, 09:11 AM


That is a great idea, to let the counselor talk with my parents first, that might still the waters a bit. I've only been seeing a school counselor, and my parents don't know her. Talking to school counselors has been helpful for me, so I understand where you are coming from - that if they helped, a psychiatrist might be able to help more.

Thank you very much, it's opened my eyes a bit and made me realize that the answers are right in front of me...
But thank you, so much!


"Whatever you are physically...male or female, strong or weak, ill or healthy - all those things matter less than what your heart contains. If you have the soul of a warrior, you are a warrior. All those other things, they are the glass that contains the lamp, but you are the light inside."
- Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Angel
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Re: Should I go to a psychiatrist or not??? - January 9th 2015, 10:40 AM

Good luck with everything and let me just say that this is so not fair what your parents do. That is just...unfair. It makes me sad. But I admire you and how strong and amazing you are. I hope everything will work out for you!
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Re: Should I go to a psychiatrist or not??? - January 10th 2015, 12:06 AM

Hi There,
I understand what you are going through. My family is similar though they didnt kick me out.
Having them meet with the counselor will hopefully be helpful.
You could also talk to your doctor and have them speak to your parents. Geeting a refferral from your doctor, someone they trust, could help you receive necesary support.
I hope this helps.
Take care and keep us updated if you would like.

"i don't care your intentions. I just want you to know my self-hatred never took me where I wanted to go. At the end of the day...I can pick at the pain but I can't cut it away."
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Re: Should I go to a psychiatrist or not??? - January 16th 2015, 03:34 PM

Hi there! You have been doing the right thing by talking to your counselors at school That is a very big step to begin with.

With your parents, I wouldn't worry what their reactions are. I'm not emotionally connected with my parents. As a child, anytime I brought up feeling sad or angry, they'd tell me to suck it up. There was never any sympathy or empathy. I SH'd and hid it for a long time. I've been seeing the counselor at my college for the past 3 years without them knowing (I still live at home). I was scared to go the first time because I though they'd find out. But they didn't. Each time I went to talk to the counselor, it was easier and easier.

Going to a psychiatrist is a great idea. School counselors don't have every resource to help you, they're there to talk and help you process your thoughts. It's wonderful yours suggested more to help you. I agree that you should go.

It's very easy to go outside your school to get help, and you're parents don't have to know. That's completely fine. They don't need to know everything. You are independent. You can drive yourself or take the bus, or if it's close enough just walk. What particularly are you scared of with their reactions? (Think about that, you don't have to answer here). Are they going to ask you why you're home late from school? Or are they still at work by the time you get home from school?

It may seem like hiding something from them, but if you're scared of their reactions, then it's perfectly fine. Don't be dependent on what they'll say. Only you know what you need. It's up to you to decide if you want to go see the psychiatrist. You don't have to include your parents in that decision and that's completely fine. You're doing something that will be positive in your life.

All the best
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