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Mad Mel Offline
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Unhappy Could this be a sign of manic depression or just "hormones" as my counsellor put it? - August 24th 2009, 06:35 AM

Okay, so let me preface by saying that I've seen two counsellors (one to talk to me, the other to decide what medicine I get and what illness I have) for three years now.
Mental illness runs HARD through my family. Bipolar, depression, anxiety, manic, Asperger's, etc. etc.

My mom took me in because she was concerned I might be bipolar, given my extreme ups and downs. The counsellor who decides who has what quickly dismissed the notion saying, "All teenagers are bipolar. What she's experiencing is only hormones." But still agreed I could see a therapist-counsellor. He belittled me to the point where I couldn't look at him for fear I'd start crying, so then he critisized me for "not listening". I actually burst out crying when we got to the car and I never cry.

Anyhow, my counsellor-counsellor Jessica talked with me for a few weeks and made another appointment with Chris (the other counsellor). After consulting Jessica's notes (and my systematically shredding a fray on my shirt) Chris grumblingly admitted I appeared to be showing signs of generalized anxiety and mild OCD.

All right, that was all fine and dandy for when I'm down.
But I go through periods of being so obscenely hyper and happy that I want to just shop, run, dance, scream, anything. My pupils get so large, I talk so fast, do so much, and go so long without sleeping that my father and counsellor have both suspected I've taken drugs. I will race downstairs and babble at my mom for several minutes, run back upstairs to text my friends, then run back down to babble some more.

I've been riding a "high" for a couple of days now and suddenly I feel a crashing low. I just feel like everything's hopeless. Really, it's taking all of my willpower not to seek out something sharp.
Just today, also, when sprinting downstairs my mom commented that she still thinks I'm manic. I'm typically pretty good at hiding when I'm feeling gloomy and angry, because I hate being a burden on people.
But I think you can kinda get an idea of why I'm not exactly jumping for joy at the prospect of meeting with Chris again?

So, I dunno. What do you think?

Last edited by Mad Mel; August 24th 2009 at 06:36 AM. Reason: Forgot a sentance.
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Prozac Offline
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Re: Could this be a sign of manic depression or just "hormones" as my counsellor put it? - August 24th 2009, 11:26 AM

Hey there Melissa,

I'm very glad that you have taken the action to already see two counsellors for what you're struggling with right now, you should be proud of yourself for managing to take those steps and they are the best ones you could have taken.

It's good that you have managed to see a therapist and a counsellor and that you (and/or your mother) have talked to them about your concerns. It is also good that you have looked at your family history of mental illness as that can often help with trying to explore your own mind and mental state - some illnesses such as bipolar can be inherited. I assume that you have already talked to your counsellor about your family's past.

I am sorry that you feel as though your counsellor quickly dismissed the possibility of bipolar and that they stated "All teenagers are bipolar." - that statement is simply untrue. Where it is true that all teenagers do have moodswings, bipolar is different to your average teenage moodswings and if you're concerned about your moodswings then they should definitely be monitored. Perhaps you could try and put this idea to your counsellor once again and maybe even produce a mood diary to try and show your counsellors some 'evidence' of what you mean by your mood episodes. The symptoms that you are describing could possibly be bipolar symptoms, but they could also be moodswings, it is up to a psychologist or psychiatrist to decide that but it is not fair of them to just dismiss the notion.

I think that it would be a very good idea to bring up this idea with your counsellor again, it is important that they do explore what you want to explore and what you feel as though the problem is - you are entitled to that. It is also important that you're comfortable with your therapist-counsellor too, perhaps you could look into seeing someone else that you could be more comfortable with?

Take care.
   
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Mad Mel Offline
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Re: Could this be a sign of manic depression or just "hormones" as my counsellor put it? - August 24th 2009, 08:00 PM

Thank you Stephanie. =]
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