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DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 6th 2010, 03:14 AM

hi, new here, this is gonna be long but bare with me its very important to me that some one responds to this in a serious manner with advice and acceptance.


first off let me explain what D.I.D is it is a disorder in which the sufferer may have 2 or more distinct personalties, i.e: multi-personality disorder. the sirousness of this disorder varies from that person past experiences, may it be a tragic accident, lost of loved ones, molestation, natural disasters, and much more. there could be 2 through thousands personalities or "alters" in a body, alters manifest them selfs when the host is experienced with mental or physical stimuli that caused the disorder in the first place, such as sadness, abuse pain, or fear. now that i explained the bases of it let me tell you my story.



i my self do not have this disorder, but one of my close friends do, and it dose not scare me like "oohhh no shes crazy get away from her" but it scares me that she has to go through with this and all alone up till now in high school where she has friends to help. she thinks of me as one of her closest friends and i would do anything to protect her, but i wish i could do more. im just affraid of what might happen to her. the other day i experienced first hand her disorder as i talked to her on the phone and one of her alters came out, and had a conversation with me. she stopped saying me and i, and said we, us , and her name (which i don't want to disclose) is scared me SO much when that happened and i wanted to run... not away, but to her to hold her and help her... if anyone has advice on this matter please post... i don't think i have what it takes to help her, at least not without advice...
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 6th 2010, 08:59 AM

Above all, if she is not currently receiving professional help, I would strongly encourage you to help her to find it. Part of that would be confirming that she does in fact have DID, as there are other possibilities for the symptoms you described. DID isn't really something that you "grow out of" (although episodes to tend to decrease with age), and to learn to control it often involves intensive therapy that may last for years. Supportive friends can be a godsend, but I stress that DID in particular is something that requires professional help.

On another note, I've never heard of a person suffering from DID having thousands of alters. I've heard claims of 20-30 (which are extremely uncommon), but not as high of numbers as you mentioned.
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 7th 2010, 01:28 AM

she is in therapy and she sees a psychiatrist on a regular basis, its just that she goes to high school, and so do i, but you know how other kids can be, they don't care about other peoples feelings so shes vary vulnerable every day, i don't have any classes with her so i cant keep other people from upsetting her... i wish i could tho... the other day 3 guys just came up to her and said "ya id f!@# that" and she didn't tell me till later that night on the phone, of course the next i told them off, but i cant be there around her all day who knows what could happen, and thank you for your concern. idk if it is possible to have that may... some people may but they just don't surface very often or at all and they may be short lapses so the host may not even know them selfs...
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 7th 2010, 02:13 AM

As much as I think it is great that you want to protect her from the world, by trying to do so, you might be hurting the situation more then helping it. She has to be able to be out in public on her own and not need someone to be with her. Just because she might have D.I.D does not mean she is helpless. And I know that is not what you mean, but this feeling of always having to be with her is not healthy. Itís not healthy for you or for her. And just know that the best way you can help her is to be her friend and listen when she needs someone to talk to. That is all you can do right about now.
As for the diagnoses of D.I.D, itís such a huge controversy. I am just going to take a wild stab in the dark and say you are from America, as most people in other countries outside of American would not diagnose someone with D.I.D. There are a lot of doctors out there that think D.I.D is not an official disorder and they do not diagnose it. And with good cause, because there is a lot of good evidence out there against D.I.D.
Because it is so controversial, maybe talk to your friend about getting a second opinion. It canít hurt, it can only help. Either the other doctor will agree, or they will disagree and perhaps find a more suitable diagnosis, if there even needs to be one at all.




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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 7th 2010, 08:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anon0 View Post
first off let me explain what D.I.D is it is a disorder in which the sufferer may have 2 or more distinct personalties, i.e: multi-personality disorder. the sirousness of this disorder varies from that person past experiences, may it be a tragic accident, lost of loved ones, molestation, natural disasters, and much more. there could be 2 through thousands personalities or "alters" in a body, alters manifest them selfs when the host is experienced with mental or physical stimuli that caused the disorder in the first place, such as sadness, abuse pain, or fear. now that i explained the bases of it let me tell you my story.



i my self do not have this disorder, but one of my close friends do, and it dose not scare me like "oohhh no shes crazy get away from her" but it scares me that she has to go through with this and all alone up till now in high school where she has friends to help. she thinks of me as one of her closest friends and i would do anything to protect her, but i wish i could do more. im just affraid of what might happen to her. the other day i experienced first hand her disorder as i talked to her on the phone and one of her alters came out, and had a conversation with me. she stopped saying me and i, and said we, us , and her name (which i don't want to disclose) is scared me SO much when that happened and i wanted to run... not away, but to her to hold her and help her... if anyone has advice on this matter please post... i don't think i have what it takes to help her, at least not without advice...
One issue with finding a doctor for her is the controversy of DID. It was formerly called MPD and do you know what the main reason was for the change in the name to DID? It was previously one of if not the rarest psychiatric disorder with about 76 cases. After the movie Sybil and some others were released, the amount sky-rocketed to 40,000 (at least). The methods for treatment and the fact so many believed they had this disorder help raise the amount of cases. Eventually after hundreds or thousands of malpractice lawsuits, MPD became changed to DID. So, whenever you mention a person having DID, most doctors and people who are fairly well educated in psychology or psychiatry are going to be very skeptical. Many don't believe it's a genuine psychiatric disorder, some do and many are caught in the middle. Myself, I'm very skeptical on the disorder so I go with the side that doesn't believe it truly exists.

You mentioned she is seeing a psychiatrist and therapist so it's evident she's getting proper care. The results aren't going to be fast, they're going to be gradual and slow. The kids at school aren't helping her but you don't want to make anyone feel like they need someone to fight every tiny battle for them regardless of their diagnosis. It makes them feel helpless and may belittle them, which is what you mentioned some kids at school are doing. I wouldn't ditch her entirely but I would let her fight her own battles as she's going to have to get through it herself. You can help her out but don't be so over-protective.
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 7th 2010, 01:06 PM

First of all, you need to know that I'm quit familiar with the feeling of having different personalities. So whatever people think about DID, I know what I'm talking about.
Your friend is going through a really hard time. That's evident, everyone would. I think you're a very good friend for her and it's normal you want to protect her. It's true it can be hard, but you have to accept you can not be always there. Because later, she will have to deal with it by herself. I know it sounds hard, but it is the truth. And I swear you, I swear you that it's already very good to have someone to talk about it, to have someone who knows it and understands it.
When you are with her and something wrong may happen, nothing forbids you to talk to her and to try to keep her calm. For example, you can keep saying that it's going to be okay or that you know she can do it. I don't know, something like that.
When something's happening to me, I have (most of the time, at school) a friend who's holding my shoulders and who keeps saying: 'It's gonna be okay. It's gonna be fine. You can handle it, I know that.' That sounds a bit silly, maybe, but it really helps.
   
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February 7th 2010, 01:31 PM

sigh* i know i cant be there for her all day every day, and i accept that. but last night she spent the night with me because she didn't want to go home, and my mom just barged in my room and yelled her head off at us and told her to go home... shes probably crying right now... i'm highly upset, because my mom knows her problems, I've told her... but now she is not allowed back over ever... i guess ill see her at school tomorrow...

thanks guys

well, ... i have had a TOTAL S@#TY day... ok lat night my friend with the problem, and my other friend we where having a sleep over i guess you would call it at my house... well my friends they had to "talk" in the living room... for 2 hours... i fell asleep so idk what whats going on... well they came back in i didnt think much of it cuz i was tierd...well,this morning they told us what happened and started a total drama fest... both my friends cut them selfs... my guy friend thretend to kill him self... and when she was telling me this i got depressed... so i drank some alcohol, and smoked a pack of cigs... and they are both seeing people... did i mention that? so now there relationships are f@#$ed up, and i feel like cutting my self now too... so ya... S!@#Y day

Last edited by Lizzie; February 7th 2010 at 11:01 PM. Reason: Merge Double Post
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 8th 2010, 11:02 AM

Oh, no, that's terrible! I have a question: were you drunk? Do you drink regularly? Have you already ever cut yourself? However: if you think there may be moments you want to, you may better put all the sharp things away from you.
Do you have any idea what they do to cut theirself? Do you have any idea how often they do it? Your other friend, have you spoken with him after this? Do you know why he wanted to kill himself?
I'm sorry if I'm asking lots of questions, but it's very important!

I feel so sorry for you!

And maybe, if your other friend is feeling down or anything, you should tell him you care for him, and that you don't want to lose him. Try to convince him from that.

Last edited by Nymous; February 8th 2010 at 02:47 PM.
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 8th 2010, 11:21 PM

hey ya... everything has worked it self out for the most part... first to answer your question... i do get drunk every now and then but i didn't have enough to get me drunk this time, just 1 glass... my friend with the problems doesn't cut her self a lot she just dose it when shes REALLY stressed... she only cut like 3 times before... my other friend never cut himself and he didn't do it this time, really (just a small half inch cut on his back) he wanted to kill himself because he was scared that his current GF would leave him... which she hasn't yet but she is probably going to...

ok now for how it resolved... well my DID friend told us because she thought it was the right thing to do... the other friend not so much... well he called his GF and told her a lie saying they only kissed... then my did friend called her and told her the truth... so she called him and broke up with him... so he threatend to kill himslef... so she was like "no, no don't, i wont leave" thats what all happend yesterday... today me and my did friend talked and we came to the conclusion that my other friend is a manipulator and if he dosent get what he wants he dose stuff till he can... this is the first time he threatend to suicide tho (my guy friend also is bipolar issues but damn he must have not took his meds that day because, GEEZ... never seen him like that) but ya he has been doing this for a while but nothing this extreme... but like if he asks for something or do something he didn't like he would punch us in the arm are be like ok see if i give you anything again... so we think we might cut him out of the group, this time he went to far and hurt everyone... and now did friends guy she was seeing wants nothing to do with her... he like just said " no, i don't care, you new that was wrong and you still did it" and we just told him about her problems and how scared she was and stuff... but damn (sorry for profanity) every thing is worked out for the most part. it is all over (hopefully) and hope we can get our lives back to normal

thanks for your support guys

i love you guys anyone who game me support is awesome *hug*
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 10th 2010, 12:27 AM

... why... why the hell is this happening to me?

to day my did friend went off at my friend who she fooled with... he had nothing much to say back... so she got upset and stormed off to her class... i went after her to talk to her... i had a REALLY REALLY REALLY dumb moment and thought it would be best to show her a note that another one of my friends wrote... saying stuff like "the friend she fooled around with is not a good friend, i cant just stop being his friend ya know? things would be better if she never came around." and so she said that she was right and went back in to the lunch room to tell them that she was right... so after that my other friend looked at me and yelled " YOU SHOWED HER MY NOTE!?!?!?!" and she had a really mean look on her face and stormed off with the guy my did friend fooled with, i yelled " i thought it was the best thing to do" she turned around and she had a look on her face that said she wants to kill me... so now afraid i might lose my best friend i got depressed and about cried in 3rd block... but i didn't and i wrote her a note saying i was sorry and stuff... she almost did not take the note...i was feeling depressed so i skipped 4th and went to my smoking friends house and got high... my did friend txt me and stuff asking if i was all right, i said ya just depressed and i asked her if she could come by and see me, she said of course. so then i txt the friend that was mad at me asking for forgiveness... she did not reply... so i was just like "crap, she hates my guts now" so i got even more depressed and got even higher... well my did friend stopped by, she was still shaken up about earlier... well she smokes cigs but not weed... so when she got there we only smoked cigs and we stopped smoking the weed... well an hour later all the other friends (both the mad one and the fooling guy) so things got awkward REALLY fast... i asked her what i asked her in the txt she said "ill think about it" with a mean tone in her voice... well that made me even MORE depressed so i sat there like a lump on the bed, so did my did friend... then the mad friend got high as well and she was having a blast talking to every one except me... so i got up and sat on the front porch... the weed smoking friend came out and told me to talk to her and i explained she doesn't want to talk to me... well he went back inside and talked to her... 10 min later she came out and said she forgave me and stuff... and we are now back being BFFs... but then my did friend talked to her ex- BF cuz he was there to... he said "i will not go back out with you" so she got REALLY upset and said " i want some weed" (she is very anti-drugs so i was like wtf?) but we started to smoke and she was mellowing out at first then she got hyper and started jumping on the bed... she also tried to jump out the window... saying " well at least i have a pair to actually do it and not B!>(# about it" i had to drag her back inside... then she sat down and tried to talk to the fooling friend... this is when she got REALLY REALLY upset and started to cry... then i think one of her alters came out... she suddenly forgot where she was... forgot who was there... and we had to hold her hand and hug her for 30 min for her to calm down... by then the fooling friend left... and she had to go (she drives) so i said be careful and txt me as soon as you get home... her house in an hour away... so about an hour later when she did not txt me i got worried cuz she could have crashed or something... well she got home and shes fine now... but geeze what a day... what a day...


sorry i seem to be posting like my life story up here... but it helps me to vent it out... and i only post the interesting days... soooo ya busy 3 days...

and again thank you guys for your support and love *hugs*
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 10th 2010, 11:03 AM

Try not to think that bad things are happening to your DID friend at the moment. I mean, she might had forgotten it, or maybe an alter of her came out who didn't know she had to text you.
You can maybe contact her, try to do that.
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 10th 2010, 09:37 PM

its over... to day she came out and said we shouldn't be friends anymore... she said that she hurt all of us and that she should move on... and we figured out she was only cring out for attntion... so we cut her off. i'm a bit heart broken cuz i liked her a lot... but meh ill get over it... thanks for all your time and support
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 10th 2010, 10:40 PM

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Originally Posted by Anon0 View Post
its over... to day she came out and said we shouldn't be friends anymore... she said that she hurt all of us and that she should move on... and we figured out she was only cring out for attntion... so we cut her off. i'm a bit heart broken cuz i liked her a lot... but meh ill get over it... thanks for all your time and support
What do you mean? How was she crying for attention, faking the DID? Or something else?
   
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Re: DID (dissociative idintity disorder) - February 11th 2010, 01:30 AM

i think she really dose have DID but the other day she took advantage of that... she pretended to switch personalities only for a few seconds after she realized that wasn't working, she said out loud a secret that only the friends knew in public about one of my other friends... that was the last straw for all of us... she played with our emotions... mine most of all, i think... she chased after my friends when i told her i loved her... she tried to date one and fooled around with the other... so we cut her off, it was the best thing we could do really... now its awkward if we run in to her at school O.o... like i saw her in the hall... and i just couldn't think of what to say... i was dumbfounded at that moment, but at least our group of friends is not broken up and everything is going back to normal... well as normal as they get around here anyway...

and again thank you guys for the support and advice... now we can put this entire thing behind us
   
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