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Mental Health Use this forum to share your mental health concerns and to seek advice.

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Kokoro Offline
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Name: Mi Sun
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Mentally fucked up. - December 17th 2010, 10:44 PM

So, my father keeps reminding me of how mentally fucked up I am.
I'm a nutcase, all I think about is drugs, sex, HIM, my baby, and how fucked up 2010 has been.

I've smiled like an idiot all year, ALL year, all the shit it's chucked at me, from January - December, nothing but smiles. But this year is crashing down around me now. And it hurts. I can actually feel the pain now.

Feel like SH-ing, even though I haven't done it in.. a long time! Feel like getting myself into trouble, Nearly got arrested yesterday. The feeling is, I want to fuck up my own life. I want so many bad things to happen to me, so I can forget about what's going on right now. It's a stupid thing to feel. But I've been feeling it for about 2 weeks now.

I feel mentally fucked up. My mind is all over the place, I've got twatface and his best friend fucking with my head, I've got friends that don't give a shit and brag about their love lives to me. I couldn't give a shit. :l

fml.


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Katrina Offline
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Re: Mentally fucked up. - December 19th 2010, 03:29 AM

Hey Mi Sun,

Gosh, I certainly am sorry to hear you haven't had the best year (which I'm sure is an understatement). I guess the good thing, as far as that goes, is that it IS 2011. And even though the transition from December 31st of this year and January 1st of next year is only a matter of a second, it CAN be a new slate; so many people consider it one, and I think that's with good reason!

I hear what you're saying in terms of smiling in the face of crisis. You know, though, I used to think that strength could ONLY be found in being independent and "sucking it up" and just handling things by oneself. Come to find out, though, I think there's absolutely a very significant of strength found in letting your barriers down, letting other people help you, and just reaching out. ALWAYS staying strong is hard. Too hard. (:

On that note, I do think you should reach out for professional help. Clearly, your dad hasn't been supportive of you this year, and it doesn't sound like your friends are really in a place right now where they can help you, so I think the other option would be to seriously consider talking with a counselor - I know that my school has a very good guidance program... perhaps you might check into seeing if yours does as well?

Just take this holiday (since I'm guessing you're about to get out of school if you haven't already) to put your mind at ease. Give yourself some time to figure things out and just...relax as much as you can. Take good care of yourself, alright? If you need someone to listen, you know where to find me!



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Re: Mentally fucked up. - December 20th 2010, 04:26 AM

Hi Kokoro,

I totally understand about what you're saying; this year has been fucked for alot of us.
I've been admitted to hospital twice, SH'ed so much, and have caught myself shoplifting around 20 times.

If things start to get really hard, opt to look for help, and not just on TH but in your area, maybe your GP, a mental health clinician or even a drop in centre.

Also, if you ever need someone to talk to, who understands, feel free to PM me.

Stay strong babe!
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