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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Unhappy Help...I don't know what this is... - April 12th 2011, 11:46 PM

For my whole life, and especially recently, I've been having these...strange feelings. They're hard to describe, but I'll try. I start to feel like everything in my vision, everything that I can see, is a wall, a really thin wall, and really flat. And behind the wall is empty space, but I can't reach it because the wall is in the way. I also feel weird, like when I see myself in the mirror I think that's not me, that can't be me.

Then I'll suddenly try to convince myself that it is me, and I don't believe it. It's weird, it's like I...I feel like my whole life is a book that I've been reading, and then suddenly I realize, wait, it's actually real life. But it doesn't feel right. It doesn't feel like it should. I don't know. I don't know how to explain.

But I feel this weird, uncomfortable feeling, like I don't recognize myself and I don't like the person I see in the mirror. I don't like her and I am not her. At least I feel that way. I don't know why. I don't know myself. I feel like nothing's real. It's a really awful feeling I have and I freak out when I feel that way, but only on the inside. I don't let it show. But I don't know why I feel like this...

I kind of just joined this website today, partly because it looked interesting and partly because I was wondering if this feeling is weird or if other people sometimes feel this way. :/

[Edit:] And I don't know if this is the right place to put this, but I'm not sure.
   
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Re: Help...I don't know what this is... - April 13th 2011, 02:25 PM

Hello, welcome to TH.

I don't know if you are depressed, but it seems as though you are deeply agitated about something, and these visions are your way of dealing with it. Have you spoken to a professional about this? It isn't normal for you to have thoughts such as those. You shouldn't be seeing things that aren't actually there. It seems you are experiencing visions or hallucinations of things that aren't in reality. I am very concerned and worried about you. You seem very depressed and upset, I don't want you to feel this way. It is in your best interest to go and talk to a professional. Talking with them, should be able to help you further. That way, they can possibly diagnose you, or come up with solutions on how to deal with this issue. You might be having these due to depression of some kind, possibly due to events that are causing you to be depressed, but a professional should be able to come up with the answer.

I thank you for coming to teenhelp. If you ever need to talk, we are always here for you.


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Re: Help...I don't know what this is... - April 13th 2011, 05:35 PM

Seeing someone professional about all this is your best bet. I can tell you now that you are not depressed, or at least I don't believe you are. I have been through depression and it's not quite like that - but everyone goes through things differently, don't they? Bottom line, get professional help. Good luck <3



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Re: Help...I don't know what this is... - April 13th 2011, 08:37 PM

Thanks... I don't think I'm depressed, though. I'm not sure...I just don't...I don't know. I feel like I'm not depressed but I don't know what it is...

Oh...And uh, this might be kind of off topic, but someone sent me a message or something, and when I clicked to open it, it told me the pop-up got blocked, so I clicked "allow pop-ups from this site" but now I don't know where to find the message...?
   
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Re: Help...I don't know what this is... - April 13th 2011, 09:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by brick by boring brick View Post
Thanks... I don't think I'm depressed, though. I'm not sure...I just don't...I don't know. I feel like I'm not depressed but I don't know what it is...

Oh...And uh, this might be kind of off topic, but someone sent me a message or something, and when I clicked to open it, it told me the pop-up got blocked, so I clicked "allow pop-ups from this site" but now I don't know where to find the message...?
Yes, someone sent you a private message. Your internet settings must have blocked it. It happens sometimes.

Just go here to read the message
http://www.teenhelp.org/private.php


You've had a landscaper and a house keeper since you were born
The sunshine always kept you warm.
   
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Re: Help...I don't know what this is... - April 13th 2011, 09:26 PM

Hey there. I'm not a medical professional but it sounds to me like some form of depersonalisation. I advice you to talk a doctor about this, s/he should recommend you to a mental health professional. I've felt a bit like this before but that was when I first started taking my anti-depressants.

I hope you'll get the support you need


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Re: Help...I don't know what this is... - April 15th 2011, 09:30 PM

Hey
I was reading your post and really related to your feeling of not knowing yourself, and feeling like things arn't real and just being detached from yourself, like an undescribable feeling that makes you feel kinda lost from yourself. I feel like this almost everyday and somedays it makes me feel hopeless, or lost or disorientated and scared, and sometimes I can brush it off but sometimes I can't. But I always keep it to myself everyday and not really sharing with anyone as I'm scared of the reaction I'll get, but it's just kinda exhausting having all this going on in my head all the time. Like life used to be simple and would go day to day conitinuously (like a book), but now it's complicated and disorientating and uncomfortable, but kind of undescribable.
I'm not sure if this is how you're feeling or not, but if it's something like this I'd suggest talk to similar people about it as keeping it to yourself (from my experiance :P) isn't a good thing, and talking and releasing your experiances and kinda being able to relate back to reality again and feel less weirded out
Anyway, Ihope you find a way to understand what's going on.
Good luck!
   
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