i just need help

[jackzeron]

sorry if this isn't where this goes or where this should be talked about but my life seems like i'm just sitting back and taking a ride because no matter what i do or say i end up doing the exact same thing and i'm starting to hate myself for it. my worst issue is not being able to motivate myself at all, followed by low self esteem, anti-social behavior, a severely heightened sex drive, and that i act on impulse and it makes my life a living hell... lately i have been lashing out at friends and pushing every one away because when ever i try to talk about this with any one I'm met with hostility or i'm told "your stupid that's nothing big its your own damn fault." but it seems like no matter how hard i want to get to work i always find myself giving up and getting onto video games... I'm intelligent, i know how to do most of this stuff but it seems like i can never get myself to sit down and do it... my parents since i have been about 9 - 10 years old have basicly saw me as some one living in their house, we never talk to each other unless we need something from the other person, that and they have expected me to learn everything without any help or guidence, my father used to be very abusive both physicaly and vocaly but now its only vocal, always yelled at me saying i was stupid for not getting it and that i'm just being lazy.... so basiclly... i want to change .... i just don't know how...

[PSY]

Welcome to TeenHelp! =)

It's hard to differentiate between "normal" and "abnormal" behavior sometimes. Procrastination/lack of motivation is one of those areas. A lot of people may tell you, "You're lazy," "Just try harder," "Just do what you're supposed to," etc. Well, sometimes it's just a matter of developing better habits, and other times a bit of additional help is needed. I can't diagnose you with ADD/ADHD or an impulse control disorder, but it might not hurt to see a psychological professional and rule out mental illnesses. At the very least, it may help you to talk to someone about the abuse you've suffered from. If you don't think getting a referral from your regular doctor is possible (due to health insurance and/or your parents finding out), you could start off by talking to your school counselor (or school psychologist, if one is available). There may also be free/low-cost community clinics in your area, as well as support groups for teens who struggle with similar issues.

[Chair]

Ever tried people-watching? Can just go to a coffee shop or a mall, get a drink. Find somewhere to sit and try to picture yourself in the shoes of other people around you. What would you buy if you were them? Why are they ordering what they're ordering? How much would you tip if you'd ordered the same thing and received the same service? How would you react to the waitress if she complimented you?
You can learn a lot about people and yourself just by doing that. Once you have played enough scenarios in your head, you can put yourself in the place of the shopper/restaurant costumer/dog-walker... etc. And then you can decide how you would treat yourself if you were the waiter/store clerk etc. and compare that to the treatment you receive.
Sounds strange, but it's not that complicated, and you learn a lot about yourself and even more about others. By doing this you could gradually motivate yourself to do more things.