im struggling with my self :(

[Dante17xD]

Hi, im having some mental fights, like i have a angel and a devil in my head, 1 says to always be good to everybody, and help people, and to dont do drugs, things like that. And then theres 1 that says to kill people, do drugs, be a bad person, rape, do a bad life and hurt other people.
I dont wanna have bad things on my had, but im afraid to turn like that, i wanna be a nice person, i like helping people, but im afraid to turn to a crazy psychopat
i really want to avoid that thoughts, but i cant. i also blame some of that thoughts for seeing many horror movies and stuff like that, that gives the idea that killing people is alright and rape is nothing bad, but i realize that is sick, for sick people.
My father and my mother dont let me watch that movies but i always watch them, without they now. But i understand that things are unreal, becouse its a movie but some teens are very sensible.
i now want to watch taxi drive, i really want to watch that movie but im afraid that makes me have more mental fights. you guys think its ok to watch?

I take a pill to concentrate on school, cuz i have a problem on concentrating. But when i take the pill, i become like a zombie, im always sad, and i dont wanna be like that. and when i dont take i become the real me i think, a happy guy ( too happy lol )
sometimes i take sometimes i dont, and people say thats bad for my body, becouse my body can star to become confuse, and i can become crazy ( lol )

you think that bad thought are from taking and not taking the pill many times and from the movies i watch. or are just a temporary thoughts ?( hope so )

Thanks




p.s - i also have a problem to express my self, when im talking i can become very boring, is there anything that can change that?

[Dante17xD]

[quote=Dante17xD;778168]Hi, im having some mental fights, like i have a angel and a devil in my head, 1 says to always be good to everybody, and help people, and to dont do drugs, things like that. And then theres 1 that says to kill people, do drugs, be a bad person, rape, do a bad life and hurt other people.
I dont wanna have bad things on my had, but im afraid to turn like that, i wanna be a nice person, i like helping people, but im afraid to turn to a crazy psychopat
i really want to avoid that thoughts, but i cant. i also blame some of that thoughts for seeing many horror movies and stuff like that, that gives the idea that killing people is alright and rape is nothing bad, but i realize that is sick, for sick people.
My father and my mother dont let me watch that movies but i always watch them, without they now. But i understand that things are unreal, becouse its a movie but some teens are very sensible.
i now want to watch taxi drive, i really want to watch that movie but im afraid that makes me have more mental fights. you guys think its ok to watch?

I take a pill to concentrate on school, cuz i have a problem on concentrating. But when i take the pill, i become like a zombie, im always sad, and i dont wanna be like that. and when i dont take i become the real me i think, a happy guy ( too happy lol )
sometimes i take sometimes i dont, and people say thats bad for my body, becouse my body can star to become confuse, and i can become crazy ( lol )

you think that bad thought are from taking and not taking the pill many times and from the movies i watch. or are just a temporary thoughts ?( hope so )

Thanks




p.s - i also have a problem to express my self, when im talking i can become very boring, is there anything that can change that? im 13]