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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 01:41 AM

Bonjour lovelies

So I'm feeling kinda triggered right now. I'm really quite angry. BUUUT instead of doing something dumb I'm just gonna tell you guys why I'm angry.

Some people are just inconsiderate. Maybe they don't mean to do the things they do, but still, it just pisses me off. They say things to me when they KNOW I have an eating disorder that are just... well, stupid. Maybe they don't know it, but honestly the things they say are just so triggering. My parents, my friends, they all say this stuff. I never realized how lightly people take this.

SO imma just tell you a couple stupid/triggering things people have said right to my face.

  • I've lost weight!
  • Ew that girl is sooo big.
  • I never realized how big she was.
  • That's gross! That girl's bones stick out.
  • I want to lose weight.
  • It's only (so and so) calories.
  • You ate all that?!
  • She's sooo thin. See, there are girls worse than you.




What have people said to you?


Only you have the power to say,
"This is not how my story will end"



   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 01:52 AM

This is an awesome thread.

"Omg, that girl shouldn't be wearing shorts."
"I wish I could look *insert extremely skinny girl."
"You're so skinny."


I said to the sun, "Tell me about the big bang"
& the sun said “it hurts to become."
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 02:34 AM

Great idea!!

"You are starting to get some curves."
"You've gained some weight, you look fuller."
"You used to be soooo skinny!"
"Remember when you wore a [EDITED]?"



When I'm sad I think, "I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt!"

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Last edited by Coffee.; July 29th 2013 at 02:49 AM. Reason: Please do not post size numbers, they are against Code of Conduct. Thanks! :]
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 09:09 AM

"Some girls should not wear a bikini"


Only you have the power to say,
"This is not how my story will end"



   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 10:21 AM

My auntie always makes indirect comments and I laugh them off but inside they hurt like hell. Like if she sees me after a couple of days, she just looks at me with disgusts and says 'you look sick' as in its my fault im so thin :@

And whenever we're out and we see someone who's bigger than average size or even someone who is generally quite big, she always say's to me, ''you're so lucky, look at them, they'd do anything to be in your position'' and it makes me so so angry because she don't even know who they are or why they are the size they are, or what size they want to be, and most of all she never considers the fact that I didn't ask to be like this, I didn't want to end up in this horrible sick downward spiral, and she never stops to think that what I consider good enough and why, is totally different to anyone else. Gosh. I just ranted a bit too much, oops :L


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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 10:42 AM

My nan used to say to me, "You look pregnant." Then I'd stop eating and she'd say, "Are you on a diet?" Then I'd eat loads again and then she'd ask if I was pregnant again and it would go on and on like this.

Thanks to her, anyone who asks me if I'm on a diet it just makes me so angry and annoyed.

My mum would sometimes say to me, "You're a skinny binny!" or it's, "You're getting a bit of steak around your legs!"

My brother recently asked, "Are you on a diet?" To contain my rage I just mumbled and walked away.

I wish my family would stop mistaking me trying to purposely lose/gain weight without understanding that my depression controls my weight. It makes me feel even worse and it makes my eating worse.


Life is for living, not for losing.
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 01:26 PM

[font="Comic Sans MS"][color="DeepSkyBlue"][b][font="Comic Sans MS"][color="DeepSkyBlue"][b]"should you really be wearing that?"
"eaten a little much today havent you?"
"you seriously eating more..."
"id ask if you were pregnant but i know your not since guys avoid you! "

"do you see that girl? she's huge!"
"oh my god do you see how short her shorts are? but how fat her legs are?"

things said to me then things said about others, pisses me off, thats when i wanna go "listen to this, listen, learn it, live it, _LOVE IT_!!" (k i tried to post link but wouldnt let me, song it Little Thing's by One Direction! ^_^ listen to lyrics not the band if ur like me and not exactly a 1D fan XP)
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 05:12 PM

I had a customer come into the gas station that I work at and tell me that I needed to watch what I eat, and how much I eat because if I got fat I wouldn't be attractive.




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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 05:30 PM

"I wish I were anorexic"
No, biotch, you don't. It's so awful. And you're ignorant for want something like that.

"I'm getting so fat by eating all this"
You're a freaking stick, no you're not"

"How'd you lose all that weight?! You look so good!!"
I'd honestly prefer no one ask me that question because it triggers me more.

"You'd have a killer waistline if you lost that tiny pouch"
I'm not sure if that was a compliment or...

"You're too anorexic, eat a sandwich"
That's so triggering for me.

Damn people


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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 06:09 PM

I've heard the following:
* " Whats that on your stomach? Oh its just fat. "
* " Looks like you've gained some weight. "
* " Omg do you ever stop eating? "
* " When aren't you hungry? "

Last edited by sydney1999; July 29th 2013 at 07:33 PM.
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - July 29th 2013, 06:49 PM

"Go do yourself a favor and eat a hamburger."

"Wow, you ate today! Let's go write that one on the calendar for everyone to see."

"Right, I forgot that you don't eat."

"You're so fat. What do you survive off of, milkshakes?"

"You try too hard."

"Why didn't you eat? You're such an embarrassment."

"Come over here, you skinny bitch."


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 2nd 2013, 02:07 PM

I also love this idea for a thread. A great place to vent and discuss such a common issue. It's always frustrating when people don't understand how much the comments they make can really affect a person. I'm going to have to agree with Glitter on a lot of the things she said, as I've encountered them as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glitter. View Post
"I wish I were anorexic"
No, biotch, you don't. It's so awful. And you're ignorant for want something like that.
^ This. Most of the time this is said by people who don't understand or know what you're going through. But it still is bothersome and hurtful nonetheless.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glitter. View Post
"How'd you lose all that weight?! You look so good!!"
I'd honestly prefer no one ask me that question because it triggers me more.
I agree so much with this. Anytime anyone asked me this question, it affected me deeply. You almost want to tell them that it's not as grand as they seem to think, and you don't look/feel as great as they see you. However, just a smile and a simple answer tends to fend off too much prying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glitter. View Post
"You're too anorexic, eat a sandwich"
That's so triggering for me.
This is something that happened to me, quite often. Whether it was a joke or people were genuinely concerned (I did encounter both) it was equally triggering and upsetting. I actually had "friends" in high school who didn't fully know my situation, but would notice that I didn't eat lunch, or snacks, or whatnot. I would end up being cornered in a hallway or the cafeteria by these people and made a scene of, as they were forcing me to eat something in front of people. They felt this was helping me but all it did was make me feel embarrassed. Not to mention the urges to start punching, haha.

Anyhow, that's just my two cents from my own experiences. People often think they're helping when they don't understand the situation or the specific disorder. I think there should be better education in place for people to understand how much their comments can hurt a person. Also better resources for young people to reach out for help, because I know at least where I'm from I didn't know of any.

Lastly, some people tend to stereotype this as a female problem. I found when I finally did reach out for help many people didn't take me seriously because of my gender. I wish there were more resources (even on the internet) for males to feel confidence in their body image and their self worth. Again, just my two cents.


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 2nd 2013, 07:19 PM

"Oooooh that's bad!" When I was eating a cookie. Ummm it's hard enough for me to eat this shit especially in front of someone, soo I prefer you keep your dumb comments to yourself. <3


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"This is not how my story will end"



   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 2nd 2013, 11:42 PM

You look good. Have you lost weight?
I've been working out at the gym and lost so much weight. Not sure how I EVER let myself get that big.
You're looking thinner around the neck, you must be losing weight.
Your pants look like their fitting looser, what size are you now?
Look at him/her they need to eat. They look anorexic!


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 3rd 2013, 02:31 AM

"She can eat whatever she wants, and I have to try so hard"
Listen, don't try? You're beautiful, and you don't have the self esteem of a frickin.... I don't even know. And I can't eat whatever I want, Kay?

"She hates you for eating ice-cream"
Would you prefer me to eat nothing again?

"You're a twig... just like me when I was anorexic"
Well I'm not you. Can you not think about yourself for just once?

"You don't need to lose weight"
And you don't need to get into my business.

"Oh, hey, you're back from Disney! Did you lose any weight?"
.....uh...I doubt it but I could fix that if you'd like?

"I could break you you're so thin"
You wanna try? please?

"You'd have the perfect body... you know, if you had a figure and an ass and some boobs and maybe if you lost a little of that tummy"
.........you're my aunt, aren't you supposed to lie to me and make me feel better??

"Dude, how much do you even weigh now, (edited) pounds?"
Actually, no. But thanks for the encouragement guys. Really.

"You don't need to be skinnier, you're already an anorexic stick"
......ouch much? I'm not anorexic.....I'm just not pretty. Or thin... so stop it.

"You should do a sport or something, it really helps take off the carbs and pounds and shit"
.....no thanks... I'm not into sports?

"Dude, you're shivering, did you eat today at all?"
What does it matter?

"I'm so chubby"
Actually, you're beautiful, and everyone likes you.

"I wanted to get rid of my stomach fat so people could like me and I could get a girlfriend/boyfriend"
Yeah? I didn't eat for... urg.... a long time, and still got rejected from guys. Because its never enough.

"Sorry, I gotta put you down, you got heavy"
......I'm sorry..... I love you too... <--- that one, yeah, that one hurt so badly. Thats the guy that I love to death....

Ugh. People.

Last edited by SparklingWine; August 3rd 2013 at 03:02 AM. Reason: Please don't post weight figures, as they are against the CoC. Thanks! :)
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 3rd 2013, 03:13 AM

"Wow, you don't look like you weigh that much!"
Is this a compliment or an insult? I don't even know.

"Remember when you weren't eating?"
Thanks for reminding me.

"You looked anorexic in 7th and 8th grade."

"Girls are stupid, who starves themselves to lose a few pounds?"
Shut. Up.

"That girl could stand to eat a cookie, she is wayyyy too thin."



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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 7th 2013, 08:56 PM

*After losing a bunch of weight from unhealthy behaviors*
"OMG, YOU LOOK SO GOOD, HOW'D YOU DO IT?"
"...diet and exercise?"


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& the sun said “it hurts to become."
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 7th 2013, 09:23 PM

"I hate emo's"
"how can people get addicted to self harm, if they were normal they wouldn't"
"you must hate everyone if you self harm"
i hate friends
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 04:59 AM

"Oh, yeah. I used to make that back when you used to eat."
"If you get under this amount of weight, I'm going to take all of your electronics away."


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 07:02 AM

This was from my doctor, when I went for back pain after taking a pretty bad fall off a ladder.

"Did you ever think that maybe your back is bothering you because you're not as thin as you used to be"

I'm not remotely overweight but, thanks for that.


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 07:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brodskie View Post
This was from my doctor, when I went for back pain after taking a pretty bad fall off a ladder.

"Did you ever think that maybe your back is bothering you because you're not as thin as you used to be"

I'm not remotely overweight but, thanks for that.
Oh my friggen god. So many doctors are so sucked into this idea that gaining weight is the devil, and they're friggen medical professionals! Recently, at my gynecologist appointment (that's right, my "lady part doctor"), he started asking me about my diet since my weight had gone up since my last appointment. Since really, that has anything to do with my dang vagina. They refuse to listen to modern science that isn't from the 1980's exercise/weight loss craze where BMI is everything and calories are monsters. Grrr.


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 10:39 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coexist. View Post


Oh my friggen god. So many doctors are so sucked into this idea that gaining weight is the devil, and they're friggen medical professionals! Recently, at my gynecologist appointment (that's right, my "lady part doctor"), he started asking me about my diet since my weight had gone up since my last appointment. Since really, that has anything to do with my dang vagina. They refuse to listen to modern science that isn't from the 1980's exercise/weight loss craze where BMI is everything and calories are monsters. Grrr.
I agree! I'm rather sick of family practitioners (or in your case, gynecologists) who are not nutritionists and receive little to no dietitian training, making comments about food, diet, and modern healthy eating. Truthfully, they don't really know what they're talking about and I'd prefer if they keep their comments to themselves.


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 11:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coexist. View Post


anything to do with my dang vagina.
Traci, did I ever tell you that I loved you?

But yeah, I get your point. Some people just don't get it, and well, you kinda just gotta accept that there is gonna be ignorant people, roll your eyes at them and move on.



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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 02:18 PM

This came from my own Dad.
"If you ever refuse to eat, we will force feed you. We will shove it down your throat."
I know he's just worried but seriously.. he scares me.


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 02:54 PM

Im only 5'3 and I finally have a healthy weight but it used to really get to me when i knew I was dangerously underweight and told people i was trying to gain weight. they were all: "But youre so thin!" "You look fine!" "I wish i was skinny" Like seriously? I looked like a starvation victim. They just didnt get what i was trying to do.





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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 8th 2013, 05:55 PM

"Go eat a hamburger, you look sick"
.......thanks dearest uncle for those kind words
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 9th 2013, 06:33 AM

"Is that all you're going to eat?"
"Ew, you're still eating?"


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 9th 2013, 06:53 AM

*grandparents says we are going to eat*
*i stand up*
"You see, once you mention food she hops right up, this girl can always eat."

Me: .....heh..yeah...

Really!? Way to make me feel good about myself >.>

"You're really going to eat all of that!!"

"That girl needs to eat a cookie or something..."
She looks fine to me.

"You'll lose weight when sports start"
So I do need to lose weight?



When I'm sad I think, "I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt!"

You can't change fate, but you can change your attitude towards it.
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 9th 2013, 07:43 AM

My favorites are the "That girl/you need to eat a sandwich/cookie/burger" comments.

As if that extra food is going to change my disordered image of myself, my habits, and restore my weight. Really.


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 9th 2013, 06:19 PM

"Wow, so are you better now? That's a lot of food."
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 9th 2013, 06:40 PM

Wow, that's a lot of food. (said not sarcastically, just because my friends are dumb)
Um.. It's one sandwich and it's my only meal all day..

I haven't eaten anything all day.. hmmm maybe I should eat... nah, can't be bothered.
Triggered triggered triggered triggered

I weigh like x pounds or something, my BMI's like x.
I don't want to know, I don't need to know, shut up I know you're thinner than me

You should go on this fasting diet with me.
NO. NO I SHOULDN'T. This from my mum who also told me I should never skip meals because it made me too grumpy... Ugh

You look pregnant/ you looked pregnant when you were bigger/ I was worried people would think you were pregnant.
Oh wow, food triggers and gender dysphoria triggers all in one sentence

Are you going to try and lose weight?
SHUT UP


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 11th 2013, 03:56 PM

"You don't need that"
or something else with the implication that I am to overweight to have something cause simply being hungry doesn't apply here... uh... thanks?

"I'm fat"
Now comments about intentions to lose weight generally won't bother me. But "I'm fat" to a person who is trying to lose weight (for a reasonable reason) who is bigger than you, that's just downright insensitive. Even if they had no idea I struggle and am trying to get healthier they'd be stupid not to realize that they're smaller and claiming to be fat is just obnoxious when it's apparent that their friend is the one who's really got a struggle... Like "what's that make me?". I find people aren't so bad about that any more but I used to get really annoyed by that. It's one thing to want to lose weight but calling anyone (yourself and others) fat just irks me a little haha




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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 11th 2013, 06:45 PM

People have said this all my life, I get I am 4 9 and I am 20, doesn't mean you should say,

"You're so small/short"
"You're my elbow rest"
"Your so cute, your so small"

Just I get it... been the same height for 5 years, get over the fact I am so "small/short"


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 11th 2013, 07:44 PM

'Is that all you're eating?' Obviously, idiot.
'Gosh, you look so good, you've lost so much weight.' Thanks babe, didn't hurt at all getting here.
'She's been going to the gym and eating healthy.' Ha, ha ha, ha hahaha sure.
'Ugh, you're so skinny, and I'm so fat.' Next joke please.
'We can't all by as slim/skinny as Em.' I'm not even skinny.
'But you used to be so chubby!' Really?!
'You've lost weight.' Oh my God I hadn't noticed thank you so much for pointing that out how can I ever repay you.


I'm perfectly normal; it's the rest of the world that's insane.



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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 13th 2013, 03:55 AM

Someone just said this to me and I'm literally in tears as I type this. I have noooo idea why it upsets me so much.

"Wow, I'm fat. I wish I was as thin as you." .. Knowing that I have an eating disorder. Then saying "I'm kidding".

Or when people wave food in your face saying, "I know you want some!"


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 15th 2013, 12:48 AM

"What'd you eat today?" I answered the question. "Its not like your anorexic or anything."


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 15th 2013, 03:06 AM

I hate when people make comments about others bodies'. Like I'm pretty sure every female has been engaged or exposed to the boon conversation when friends try to pick and pour out what boob size you are . I feel that conversations like that can play on person's insecurities. We don't know who's insecure until they say so. So those girls had no right talking bout who's eating this much and who gained weight cause at the end of the day no one cares and it's about how that individual views his/her body.
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 15th 2013, 04:25 AM

"Is that all you're eating? Its not even healthy! Like, I'm not sure whether or not that cupcake you're eating is good for you because its food and you don't need to lose weight or bad because its unhealthy and you don't need to gain it. Eat something, you know... better. You aren't skipping meals again are you? Come on. Don't do this to us again. Go eat something real. But not junk."
.....no. I think I just.... won't eat anything now. Love you too.


"Taylor you won't be a teenager forever, stop eating like a horse, you'll regret it one day"
you're kidding me right? You know sometimes, I already regret it. I Always regret the food I eat. Thanks. Really.


"You know, you take way too many pictures of yourself (talking about my photography here). Selfies and pictures of oneself are a sign of low self esteem and confidence. Are you self conscious about your body? Or like, your weight? ....you should be. Its not natural how scrawny you are."
Triggered triggered triggered triggered triggered please stop.
   
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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 15th 2013, 01:02 PM

"I don't shop there anymore." "Oh, that's because you can't fit."


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Re: Stupid things people say. - August 16th 2013, 02:59 AM

"You weigh ____? Danggg you're fat."
Dude, you're in my weight class -_- shush...but then they say "just kidding," when they see the look on my face. *sigh*

"I'm just saying that you're going to have weight problems when you're older."
Gee, thanks for that mom .___.


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