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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
renai. Offline
Not a n00b
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Name: reh-nay
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"you don't look bulimic" - May 31st 2015, 04:15 PM

A few years ago, I struggled with anorexia and bulimia, and I would constantly hear things like "you don't look like you have an eating disorder" or "maybe you should keep it up, you need to lose weight". I've always been overweight (technically obese). But I still suffered the same effects that anybody else would - I lost my hair, I was exhausted, my nails were horrible, always cold...ya know.

Well about a week ago, I had a bulimia relapse. And so I binged and purged for three or four days. Then I had a thought.

I love the way I look. I love who I am. The ONLY thing I would change about me is that I have a double chin. But I'm okay with who I am. I have great hair, beautiful eyes, my eyebrows are on fleek right now. So when people tell me "there's no way you had bulimia, you are way too fat" I just say F*CK YOU. Because you will never know the heart problems and thyroid problems I have now because of what I put my body through then.

I'm stronger than I've ever been, and I'm beautiful as heck, and if you can't see that, you're not worth my time.

Ladies and gentlemen, don't ever let anybody tell you how you should look. Period.

- renai.

it's just a spark, but it's enough to keep me going. and when it's dark out, no one's around, it keeps glowing.

the truth hurts but it hasn't stung enough to stop me.

see, you're just wasted and thinking 'bout the past again, darling, you'll be okay.

You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way. - song of songs 4:7

Last edited by renai.; June 1st 2015 at 02:34 AM.
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Palmolive Offline
Purr Purr Purr.
Jeez, get a life!
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Re: "you don't look bulimic" - May 31st 2015, 05:47 PM

I'm so happy to see this. You deserve to be happy about how you look despite struggling with eating disorders. You've gone through a lot and the fact you can stand here and say you are happy with yourself in wonderful and hurrah to that. If you ever need anything, know that I'm always a PM away so don't feel afraid to PM me. But stay strong and keep fighting. Be PROUD of yourself!

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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emma01 Offline
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Re: "you don't look bulimic" - June 2nd 2015, 10:19 AM

Ugh why do people think its OK to judge your mental state by your physical appearance. So not cool.

But I am so so happy for you! Your attitude is amazing and you've done so well! Keep it up girl
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
SparklingWine Offline
Normality, my friends.
Jeez, get a life!
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Re: "you don't look bulimic" - June 2nd 2015, 03:30 PM

Unfortunately there are stigmas attached to eating disorders and the way one should look should they have an ED. It's sad because people who don't understand the illness are the ones that have the worst, uneducated comments that can leave a person feeling bad about themselves. A lot people are very uneducated about Eating Disorders, and I think that's a reason why there are stigmas, and negative comments.

As for you, you're a freaking rock star! You took a very negative experience and turned it into something you could use towards recovery. This shows that you're strong, and you can get through the bad things you may come across in your life. You very much are beautiful! And I'm so proud of you for realizing this.

Take good care of yourself, and I'll be around if you need me. <3

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Heathen Offline
Beauty and Bedlam
Jeez, get a life!
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Re: "you don't look bulimic" - June 3rd 2015, 12:07 AM

Thank you so much for sharing this. It's incredibly inspiring.

I told my psychiatrist I thought I might have an eating disorder and she just proceeded to tell me that it was good I was concerned about my size because I needed to lose weight. It was incredibly hurtful and threatened the level of trust I had in her. Eating disorders can happen to people of any size and they shouldn't be discounted just because someone doesn't look a certain way. I'm glad you are in a place where you feel comfortable with how you look. That's incredibly important and it's great that you've achieved that.

The moon asked the crow
For a little show
In the hazy milk of twilight
No one had to know
The moon asked the crow...
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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Chai. Offline
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Re: "you don't look bulimic" - June 3rd 2015, 02:38 PM

I know people who think Eating Disorder is an attention disorder. Seriously, people who are unaware of what this disorder actually is, are the main cause of such unreasonable comments. It's not something that can be changed because actually making people understand that something apart from their point of view is the truth, is not an easy task. But what can be changed is how we react to such comments. And you girl, are an inspiration to all of us with eating disorders. I have to agree with Lynds, you are a rockstar. You're attitude is amazing and I am so glad you have come to realize that you are beautiful. Because, you are. Never forget how beautiful you are and don't let anyone think otherwise. <3

"Being happy isn't about having everything in your life perfect. Maybe it is about stringing together all the little things."

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you dont look bulimic

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