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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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daisyduck Offline
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weight gain with ED / experience with dietitian - January 20th 2016, 02:05 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of eating disorders, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I haven't posted on here in a couple years but i used to be an active poster. Something has arisen and i'd prefer to bring it up here than on another forum.
I will exclude numbers.

I see a dietitian. I had/have anorexia which has morphed into EDNOS which has morphed into BED. I am currently xxx lbs higher than my lowest weight and xx lbs higher than my baseline. I went to treatment for the anorexia and all that jazz a couple years ago and recently sought out the dietitian after all the weight gain.

Anyways I thought she was wonderful. She weighed me once a week. Blind weights. Told me i was stable no weight gain. WELL SHE LIED. I confronted her that i was concerned about my weight and she confessed that i had actually gained but that that wasn't her concern. I PAY HER TO BE CONCERNED. I weighed myself to day. I've gained xx lbs in just two months. She didn't tell me when it was just a little....instead i've gained double digits.

I haven't even binged regularly recently. I don't know where the weight is coming from. I'm getting some medical testing eventually but i'm worried.

Of course now my mindset has shifted to the anorexic mindset. no more food. ever. and i know that's dangerous but i know i can lose a lot of weight very quickly if i try.

I am so angry. so devastated. I want to self harm so much.
   
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Re: weight gain with ED / experience with dietitian - January 21st 2016, 10:55 AM

Hey,
I'm sorry this has happened. She shouldn't have lied, but maybe she thought she was protecting you.
I think you should try to see someone for the anorexic thoughts. This is something that needs to be stopped as soon as possible, as you probably know, to avoid a full blown relapse. As someone who has been through several different eating disorders I know how easy it is to give in and start losing again, but you're stronger than that, and you can beat this.
Take care


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