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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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Are my thoughts destroying me?... Yes... Yes they are. - June 2nd 2016, 06:12 AM

I had a weird thought earlier. Ive been starving a lot lately and just not eating much and losing a lot of weight. Anyway, earlier i had a huge craving for sweets and junk food but i knew i couldnt give in. I was actually thinking about eating a bit more than every few days because i didnt want my metabolism to slow down and store fat. But i dont want to go down that road. Im such an ambitous person that i will do anything for my goals to happen even if its not at heart anymore. I suddently want to start eating healthy (meaning more food) again but something is just holding me back. I need to stop thinking about this and get on with my life of starvation.

I swallowed way too many diet pills to supress my appetite and now my stomach hurts. Im in pain from starving and im already experiencing the mental and physical pain from it. I know i need to stop but i just cant. And im super depressed, i keep thinking of suicide. What should i do?
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Re: Are my thoughts destroying me?... Yes... Yes they are. - June 2nd 2016, 07:24 AM

Hey Cheyenne,

Intrusive thoughts like this can be so difficult to work through. I'm sorry that you're dealing with them at the moment, but you should be so proud of yourself for reaching out! That's a great first step in the right direction.

First things first, take a step back and try to think about what starvation and diet pills are doing to your body. Chances are you have a lot less energy than before, you feel yourself getting tired faster, and you never feel quite like yourself. In addition, starving yourself will actually make it more difficult to keep weight off if you ever do eat more than you're used to. When your body adjusts to a certain level of starvation, it will start to realize that something is wrong and that it isn't getting the nutrition that you need. So, when you do eat, your body will hold on to more of the nutrients in whatever it is that you eat than it normally would because it doesn't know when it's going to have the chance to get those nutrients again. Your body may stop digesting food properly and, as I said before, will make it a little bit more difficult for you to lose weight.

It's great that you're starting to think about a healthy diet instead of starvation. Realistically, you'll lose weight in a much healthier way by maintaining a healthy, nutritious diet and keeping up with an exercise routine. If you rely on starvation to keep weight off, your results will reverse pretty quickly when you do start eating normally again. However, by going about things in a healthy way, you're more likely to see much more permanent results. Have you thought about talking to your doctor about what is going on? If not, it's something that I would definitely recommend! They may be able to refer you to a nutritionist/dietician or provide you with a comprehensive nutrition plan themselves for your age, body type, and goals. Perhaps you could even ask a friend or family member to start eating healthy and working out with you to help motivate you to keep up with your routine.

I hope this helps some!

Take care,

wanderlust consumed her;
foreign hearts & exotic minds compelled her.
she had a gypsy soul
and a vibrant heart for the unknown.
-d. marie
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Re: Are my thoughts destroying me?... Yes... Yes they are. - June 10th 2016, 04:53 AM

Thanks so much.
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